~Nick To the Rescue~

[Baby_Girl89]

Hey there fan fic readers. Izzy here, here's one of my infamous fan fics. For those of you who read it before there's more towards the end for you to catch up on and for those of you who have never read it, there's plenty for you to see. I hope you enjoy. :D

http://www.photobucket.com/albums/0603/AngelEyesJBT/IZZY/Rescue.gif
^^Thanks to Rae for the banner.^^

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 1~

I was starting a new life. I was moving onto college a place to start all over again, to let go of things of the past. But there was just one thing haunting me from the past that I just couldn’t let go of. Why, I often asked myself, is this still going on? I figured that once I moved on I could make the whole nightmare go away.

But unfortunately I was wrong. It seemed like nothing I did could make the situation disappear. Why I had to fall in love with the idiot to begin with, I don’t know. I didn’t think that it would ever really mean anything. I just thought that it was nothing more than a celebrity crush. However, it turned out I was wrong and that it was going to be the most excruciating experience of my life as well as the most joyous.

I had first discovered Nick and the rest of 98° when I was fifteen. I had some “contacts” with them through some other things that they had done before, but I never really knew who they were until then. I had first come to realize who they were when my cousin started to play their CD all the time. It was his voice that had me captivated. When I initially saw them, it was Drew who caught my eye, but Nick’s voice was like no other I had ever heard before. You’ve heard of love at first sight, well I was in love at first listen.

At first it wasn’t anything much, just a simple celebrity crush type of situation that almost everyone goes through. But for me it turned out to be something so much more than that. At first it was all fine and dandy, because I had been deceived into thinking that he was single. There’s something that has to be understood about me, I would never go after another woman’s man celebrity or not. I felt that it just wasn’t right to fantasize about a man that’s taken. So one day, a couple of months after the whole thing had started, I found out some devastating news. The idiot had a girlfriend.

Well surely you’d think that the first thing I would do would be to try and figure out ways to get him out of my head right? Wrong, I spent the entire time denying the whole thing I even made jokes about being his girlfriend. Then of course I had to see Jessica herself confirm it, and then I saw them together more and more often, but to me it didn’t seem to matter. It was strange how the denial sank deeper and deeper. I spent my entire sophomore year of high school dreaming that he would find me and want to be with me. It was pretty bad though considering he was nearly eleven years older than me.

But then it wasn’t helping either, when my friends sort of egged me on and told me that it could happen. So there I was falling in love with a man who was ten and half years older than me. He was the only crush I was to have that year, real or otherwise. My true problem was I had spent such a great amount of time wishing for someone I never thought would come to life and here he was, trapped in Nick. I swear it was like I had been dreaming about him since I was ten.

I had so many qualities that I had wanted in a guy, sure that I would never in my life be able to find him. And then one day all I had to do was listen to his voice, which was actually Mulan’s fault by the way, and I became helpless. Could you possibly tell me the logic in that? Was there a reason for this insanity to have begun? I spent the next two years of my life trying to get him out of my head.

I kept on trying until that day.

After I found out that Nick got engaged I worked even harder to get him out of my head. As I was working on getting Nick out of my system, I had to try many different things. One of my hobbies was to write fake love letters to this guy that I had spent those last three years despising as well. He was such a pain, so I figured I’d find a way to get back at him. However, my plan backfired and the “fake” love letters had started to hold a bit of truth in them.

When I had finally found the courage to tell him who I was, it turned out he started to fall in love with me because of my letters. But there were already roots to his madness. It turned out he had wanted me the whole time I had despised him. Small world, wouldn’t you say? He was just always afraid to say anything because he felt that I wouldn’t return his feelings. Well he was right.

Anyway, after that we started dating for a while. I thought now that I’ve actually encountered having my first boyfriend perhaps, I can begin to get over Nick. For you see I’d never actually had a boyfriend or had a dating experience. I believe that I thought that, that was one of the reasons I had Nick on my mind ever so constantly. Well apparently I was wrong. I still thought about Nick all the time. It didn’t seem to matter that I was already with someone.

One day my boyfriend had taken me out to dinner and little did he know it was going to be his fall.

We were sitting in the restaurant just talking. My boyfriend started to look a little uncomfortable and so I asked, “What’s wrong Sean?”

He took my hand and somehow, somewhat forced me to look into his eyes and said, “Well I don’t want to pressure you or anything and you know that I love you, but I was wondering...”

“What sweetie?”

“I was wondering when we were going to have our first kiss.”

So I said, “But I’ve already kissed you.”

I could see that he was trying to be calm and patient with me. “Well I meant on the lips, not the cheek. I mean we’ve been together for almost five months now, and I just wanted to you know ... “

“Sean I’m sorry. I know this is hard for you but you have to understand, never having done this before I have to know that I’m ready before I just kiss you. I’ve told you time and again that I’m what most people would call a pure virgin. Everything in this relationship is new to me.”

“But I love you.”

“I know you do, but if you really want this, how do I know that later on you won’t want something more?”

"I would never do that to you. It’s just that I’ve never been with a girl this long and never got a kiss.”

“Sweetie, it was hard enough to kiss you on the cheek. It’s still going to take some time for me to even truly get used to dating you.”

“I know. But it’s been five months!”

“I know that’s a long time, but ... “ then I looked at our linked hands. I didn’t know what to tell him. It really was a difficult situation for him and me. It was my first, but it wasn’t his.

“All right well then let’s talk about something else,” he said calming down. I started to get a little nervous when he said that and I had no idea why. So then I started to look around the restaurant and I spotted someone who looked familiar. He actually looked a lot like Nick but I couldn’t believe it. And he was staring right at me too. Then I looked away. That’s when Sean busted out with, “Why are you always looking at other guys?”

I could see his insecurity mounting. It’s true I did look at other guys, but it’s not like I flirted with them or did anything wrong. Besides, he did the same thing, didn’t he? “Well, Sean I may look at them, but it’s you I’m with. Don’t you look at other girls every once in a while?”

[Baby_Girl89]

“I used to, but ever since I started dating you, I never had a reason to.” When he said that, my heart started to melt a little. But I couldn’t seem to stop myself from looking at the other guy. He looked like he was on date too, but every time I turned around, I saw him looking in my direction. Are Sean and I causing a scene? I thought. So I looked around and saw that everyone else was minding their own business. So what was going on? Sean snapped me out of it by saying, “And why are you constantly staring at that guy? What does he have that I don’t?” He was raising his voice and now he was causing a scene.

“Sean, please calm down. People are beginning to look at us. Please stop acting like this.”

“Acting like what?” Then he proceeded to stand up to finish letting out his anger. “How do you expect me to act when I take my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant and all she can do is stare at another guy?”

At that point the guy got up from his table leaving his girlfriend dumbfounded. He walked over and said, “Excuse me sir, but I don’t think you have a right to talk to your girlfriend like that.”

Sean was a little taken back by the comment and just stood there.

So I said, “Excuse me sir, but I can handle him. Thank you anyway.”

He said, “I’m sorry. I just can’t take it when a guy goes off on his lady like that.”

Then Sean said, “Look Mister whoever you are, I will talk to her the way I want to talk to her. But you’re right, I was out of line.” Then he sat down and said to me, “I’m sorry, Honey I just couldn’t take what was happening.”

“It’s all right Sean, I forgive you.”

The man looked quite pleased with himself and said, “There that wasn’t so hard now was it?” Then his girlfriend came over to collect him and she oddly enough looked like Nick’s fiancée Jessica.

She said, “Nick are you done playing hero now?”

That’s when it hit me. I had to know who this guy really was. So I said, “Sean darling will you excuse me I need to do something?” Then I stood up, looked at Nick and asked him, “Would you mind if I talked to you for a while?”

He looked at me in a pleased shock and nodded his head. He left a flabbergasted girlfriend and I left an annoyed boyfriend. We went to the foyer. I had to make sure that I wasn’t going nuts. He seemed to sense my feelings and asked me, “What’s wrong?”

I replied with, “Well forgive me for being too forward, but you remind me of someone.”

He looked at me with smirk on his face and said, “Oh really, who?”

I didn’t have much of a choice but to say, “I know this is going to sound completely idiotic and you probably won’t even know who I’m talking about but...”

“But who?”

“But you look like this guy Nick Lachey from a group called 98 Degrees.”

His smile got even wider and he looked amazing. He made me weaker in the knees with one smile than Sean ever made me feel with anything else. “I wouldn’t say that’s crazy.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m who you think I am.”

“What?!” I exclaimed in total surprise.

“That’s right, I’m Nick Lachey. And I’ve been waiting for you my whole life.”

I was speechless and yet somehow I managed, “Are you kidding me?”

He replied, “No, when I first saw you I couldn’t believe my eyes. I thought I was just hallucinating. Jessica was getting just about at mad as your boyfriend there. But now that I’ve found you I’m never going to let you go.”

“What about Jessica?”

“I’m going to have to break up with her now aren’t I?” he responded.

“You don’t expect me to just break up with Sean like that do you?” I may have still been in love with him, but he didn’t know that and I wasn’t going to give into temptation. He might not have been what I wanted, although I seriously doubted that.

“Well I guess not, but I’ll be there for you if anything goes wrong.”

“Are you still going to break up with Jessica?”

“Yes. I can’t very well be with her if I’m going to spend my life thinking about you.”

“I can’t date you, you know?”

“Maybe not now.”

“What if not ever?”

“Then can’t I just be your friend?”

What a horrible question to be asking me. So I changed the subject, “So what are you and Jessica doing here anyway?”

“We wanted to go somewhere secluded and private. And I guess it was fate that led me here. So what about it? Can we at least be friends?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think Sean would approve.”

“Do you do everything your boyfriend says?”

Little did he know that I didn’t want to answer him because I was afraid of what might happen. This would probably end up as one male/female friendship that would turn out to be more, much more. But I said, “No and I suppose there wouldn’t be any harm in having you as a friend.” I hope, I added to myself.

“So can I get your name and maybe a number so that I can call you?”

“It’s Jennifer.” Then I found a napkin took out a pen and wrote down my number and handed it to him. “This is my number. Feel free to call me when you get bored.”

“I’ll be sure to do that.”

“Well we better get going.”

“But I’d much rather stay here and talk to you.”

“Putting off a break up?”

“That and wanting to be with you.”

“Maybe this friendship thing won’t be such a good idea after all.” I reached over for the napkin, but he stuck it in his pocket and I wasn’t about to go there.

“It’s too late for that.” I playfully smacked him in the arm and we walked back to our respective tables.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 2~


I sat down and looked at Sean. He had a look of shock and confusion on his face. “What was that all about?” He asked, surprisingly calm.

“Nothing, Honey, I just needed to ask him a couple of questions.”

“Do you... do you know him?”

“Well not really.”

“Then what could you possibly have to talk to him for?”

“Sweetie, stay calm.”

Taking in deep breaths, he whispered, “I’m trying. I just want to know what that was about.”

“Sean, it’s nothing you have to worry about, okay. So let’s just finish our meal and get going.”

“If you say so,” he said breathing in a sigh that said he didn’t really want to let it go.

“Just trust me, will you?”

“Of course I trust you.”

“Do you?”

“Yes, I trust you, more than anyone else in this whole world. You’re one of the few people that I can trust.”

“Then stop being so insecure and act like it.”

“You’re right, I’ve been overreacting. Will you forgive me?”

Smiling at him I said, “Of course.”

Meanwhile, Nick and Jessica had left. He was about to break that poor girl’s heart and it was going to be my fault. He didn’t even have me and he was still planning on leaving her. Maybe he knew something I didn’t yet. So Sean and I finished up and then we left.

He drove us back to the campus. When we got there we decided to go for a walk. We just walked around the campus holding hands under the moonlight. Under the circumstances I might have had the urge to kiss him, but something didn’t feel right. I couldn’t seem to get my mind off of what had happened at the restaurant. Nick was fighting his way back into my mind fiercer than ever. And now he was a clear and present danger to my life.

We finally just found a place to stop. He held me in his arms. Even though it was a warm night I was shivering and no matter how tightly Sean held me, I seemed to get colder and colder. I didn’t understand what was happening. Looking back I’m not so sure I understand it any better now. Maybe I knew it just wasn’t going to work out with Sean. I just wanted to give the relationship a chance. I’m not sure why I wanted it to work so much, because I knew that somewhere within me, I just knew there was never a real chance.

After standing outside for a while in each other’s arms Sean walked me back to my dorm room. I thought, This is it, the chance to give him what he’s been waiting for. It’s a good chance to get this kiss thing over with. So I looked up and was about to kiss him when I just couldn’t do it and I turned my head to kiss him on the cheek once again. Then I watched him walk off.

I remember thinking to myself, Why didn’t I just kiss him tonight? I’ve had two perfect chances and I just couldn’t do it. Now I know there was a reason for it. He just wasn’t the one. I had waited so long for my first kiss that I wasn’t planning on just giving it away to anyone. I think I still felt a little uncomfortable about dating him. How does someone get over something they’d felt for so long? I mean dating Sean was just an experience that I never expected to have, I mean it was just strange.


* * * * *


I went to sleep that night reliving the scene over and over again. I couldn’t believe it had happened. It just didn’t seem real. How could it be? I was even beginning to think that the whole Sean thing was just part of my imagination. Then I was awoken by the sound of the telephone ringing. It turned out to be Sean.

“Morning, Sunshine.”

“Sean, is that you?”

“What you don’t recognize my voice anymore?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t get to sleep until late last night and I’m still a little groggy.”

“It’s all right. Do you mind if I come up?”

“Oh, I’m not quite dressed yet.”

“That’s fine with me,” he answered coyly.

“Sean!” I said trying to control my giggling.

“I’m just kidding. Why don’t you just call me back when you’re ready?”

“Okay. Can I ask you something first?”

“Anything, Baby.”

“What happened last night?”

“You mean you don’t remember?”

“Vaguely.”

“We went to the restaurant last night and then we took a walk around campus.”

“That’s it?”

“Pretty much. Why?”

“I was just curious, that’s all. Needed to make sure my memory was still intact. That’s what I thought happened. I’ll call you in a bit. Bye.”

“Bye. I love you.” Then he hung up. Well from that I definitely thought I had made up most of the night. As you can see he forgot to mention the whole other guy thing. So I just thought that once again I had spent another night only dreaming about Nick. But then the phone rang again. Naturally I thought it was Sean again, that he had forgotten something.

So when I picked up the phone I said, “Yes Sweetie?”

The voice on the other side said, “Well hello to you too.”

Since it wasn’t Sean, I was a little embarrassed and so I said, “I’m sorry I thought that maybe it was my boyfriend calling me again.”

The voice said, “Well it could be.”

Since I still wasn’t quite awake I hadn’t recognized the voice and I said, “Excuse me, but who are you?”

He said, “You don’t recognize this voice from last night?”

I said, “Nick?” quite bewilderedly.

“Very good,” he said. Then he said, “I’m sorry, did I wake you? I wasn’t quite sure when I could call you.”

“No you didn’t. Are you who you say you are?”

“Not unless you want me to be someone else.”

“I’m sorry are you Nick Lachey?”

“Yes I am.” If I had the phone held up to my ear I would have dropped it, luckily I had a headset on. However, I did fall quite silent. So he said, “Hello, are you still there?”

I snapped out of it and said, “Yeah, I’m just a little out of it, sorry.”

“No need to apologize. I was just wondering if you were doing anything today.”

“Not that I know of.”

“Want to do something with me?”

“I don’t know. Do you suppose that maybe you could call me back later? I have some things I need to tend to right now.”

“Oh sure. When should I call you?”

“In about two hours.”

“Got it. Bye.”

“Good-bye.” I hung up the phone. My mind was reeling once again. I couldn’t believe what had just happened. This time there were no witnesses so I couldn’t possibly ask anyone. I had the incredible urge to *69 him. But I decided to wait and see if he would call back. Meanwhile I had to get ready and call Sean back.

[Baby_Girl89]

After I finished fixing myself up about 10 minutes later I called Sean. His roommate picked up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hey, can I speak to Sean?”

“Oh he just left. Do you want to leave a message?”

“Could you just tell him that his girlfriend called and that he can come up now?”

“No prob.”

“Thanks.” Two minutes after I hung up the phone there was a knock on my door. I thought, Wow that was fast. I opened my door to find my best friend Alex there.

“Hey what are you doing here?” I said giving her a hug.

“What a girl can’t come to see her best friend?”

“Well it’s just that I’m used to having you call first.”

“Well I tried, but you’re line was busy. So I figured I’d just show up. I knew you were here and that’s all that mattered.”

“There’s something I have to tell you. Oddly enough I didn’t write about it so I just have to tell you.”

“What? What is it? Did Sean hurt you? I swear that boy is more trouble than he’s worth. I’m going to hurt him if he did anything...”

“Alex you know better than that. That boy is practically obsessed with me.”

“I know, I know, it’s really unhealthy.”

“Anyway, it’s something bigger than that.”

“What?”

“Remember how I said that I would never meet Nick so I better get over it?”

“Yeah.”

“Well something happened last night...” Knock, knock. “Hold on.” I went to get the door and there Sean was standing there with flowers.

“I was wondering when you’d call.”

“I told you I had to get ready first.”

“Well it was well worth the wait. By the way my roommate thinks you have a sexy voice.”

“Like I needed to know that.”

“Well don’t worry, he knows you’re mine.”

Under her breath I could hear Alex say, “If only you knew the truth, if only you knew the truth.” Alex was the only person around me that knew how I felt about Nick. She knew I couldn’t tell Sean that I loved him because I had feelings for Nick and that I didn’t love Sean.

I had him come in and I walked over to where Alex was sitting and I told her that I’d have to tell her later. But I realized I hadn’t even written in my friendship book yet so as I sat there and wrote, Alex was forced to talk to Sean. She didn’t really like the idea that we were dating but she had to admit that he had changed ever since he started dating me. She still thought that I could’ve done better. I told Alex as much as I could in the book in the short amount of time I had to write. Then we switched books and she left. She had some other things to take care of, and she felt like the third wheel. I didn’t want her to go, but she really needed to leave.

So Sean and I sat there and talked for a while. He didn’t bring up the events of the night before. Gee, I wonder why. I think Sean wanted to forget that the whole ordeal had ever happened. Maybe he sensed that he was going to lose me. He told me that he was going to have to go to work soon, even though he would rather have stayed with me. He hoped that I would be able to find something else to do. So we just sat there and watched a movie until he had to leave. Something still didn’t feel right.

When the movie ended, Sean left to get ready for work. Once again I had the perfect opportunity to kiss him and I just gave him a peck on the cheek. Then right on schedule, just as Sean had left the phone rang.

I picked it up and said, “Hello?”

It was Nick. Two hours time had passed right on the dot and I hadn’t even realized it. “Hey. I called back as promised.”

“Wow you’re really punctual.”

“I get that a lot. But I had to make sure to get it right this time for sure. Something this important deserves my attention.”

“Don’t tell me you sat there watching the clock this whole time.”

“No, I’d blink every once in a while.” I started to laugh. “Can’t get enough of that beautiful laughter. I can just imagine your face right now.” I felt so relaxed talking to him. It was like no other feeling I had ever felt. It was like I had always imagined it. He made me feel like myself. No other guy had ever done that before. It was like magic. But I couldn’t risk anything yet. I barely knew the man, although it felt like I’d known him forever. “So what are you doing now?”

“Well I should be working on my homework, but knowing my teachers nothing needs to be done.”

“Oh so you’re a student.”

“Yeah.”

“Where at?”

“NAU.”

“Northern Arizona University. Is it a good school?”

“So you do know the name of the university here?”

“Of course, doesn’t everyone?”

“No, but I guess since you were dining pretty close to here last night, you’d have to know the school, wouldn’t you? And yes it is a good school.”

“So what are you doing then, if not your homework?”

“Nothing really. My boyfriend just went to work and my best friend’s busy. So I guess I’m hanging out by myself.”

“Well how about I hang out with you?”

“Don’t you have anything better to do than hang out with a college freshman?”

“Well my girlfriend and I broke up last night. So...nope.”

“Aren’t you moving a little bit fast? I mean shouldn’t you wait a while before you try to jump right in. It wouldn’t look too nice to be behaving the way that you are.”

“Well I broke up with her and I’m not moving too fast. I just need to hang out with a friend to mend my broken heart.”

“Uh-huh. So you went through with it, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It wasn’t your fault.”

“Right,” I answered sarcastically.

“No really. I guess I always knew that it wasn’t going to really work out between us. I guess we both just wanted it to, but in my heart I felt that you were out there, but since I couldn’t find you I had to move on.” I didn’t know how to respond to that. I felt pretty much the same way, except for the fact that I knew he existed. It must’ve been so hard for him.

“I’m still sorry.” I didn’t know what else to say.

“It’s okay. So how about it? Want to hang out with old Nick Lachey over here?”

“You’re not that old,” I replied.

He chuckled and a smile spread across my face. He really was like what I imagined. Then I started to fall in love with him for real. “So where are you living?” he asked, breaking me out of my thoughts.

I hesitated, but then I said, “I might as well tell you. What do I have to lose?”

“Exactly.” So I told him. Little did I know I was going to be up for the ride of my life starting with that moment and the next month of my life. I may have had an excruciating experience in loving him before, but this was going to prove to be quite different. It didn’t really seem wrong at the moment, but I found that I was going to be wrong. From then on my life flipped upside-down and I was in for one heck of a roller coaster ride. My emotions were going to go haywire.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 3~


Five minutes later there was a knock at my door. I once again thought it was going to be Sean. Well for once I was right. I opened the door and he said, “I just couldn’t leave without seeing you one last time.”

“Sean, aren’t you going to be late?”

“Nah, I still got a few minutes before I absolutely have to leave.”

“You are such the procrastinator.” I opened the door wider and let him in.

“Well only when it comes to you.”

“Don’t blame me.”

“Besides I didn’t want you to be alone.”

“It’s not like I’m incapable of being by myself.”

“I know.” Knock, knock.

“Just a second.” I walked over to the door to answer it and I found myself once again face to face with Nick. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I shut the door in his face and turned around to look at Sean.

“Who is it Honey?”

“No one important they got the wrong room, I think.” Knock, knock. What choice did I have but to turn around and open the door? I stepped out of the room and said, “Sorry about that. You kind of caught me unexpectedly. I didn’t think you’d be here so soon.”

“I was pretty close to here, actually. Are we gonna stand out here and talk?”

“Oh um...”

Then my door crept open and Sean came out, with his back turned to us as he said, “Sorry, Babe, but I’ve gotta get going.” Then he turned around and saw me and Nick standing there. “What’s he doing here?”

“Well you wanted me to keep myself busy right?” I answered a little uncomfortably.

“Yeah, but not with him.”

“Honey, he’s just a friend,” I said after calming myself.

“I thought you said you didn’t know him last night.”

“Well we just became acquainted last night.” He gave me a questioning look that said Yea, right. So to change the subject I said, “Shouldn’t you be heading off to work now?”

He looked like he gave Nick the evil eye as he hugged me. I could see it in his eyes as he neared me and as he let me go. “I’ll call you later. And remember I love you.”

“I know Sean, I know.”

Before he headed off he held my gaze and said, “Bye.”

I called, “Bye,” right after him.

Then Nick snapped me out of watching him go by saying, “So what shall we do now?”

I turned my head, looked at him and said, “Well I suppose we can go into my room. Don’t worry, as you can tell we don’t have that, no guys in the room rule.” So we walked in and he distinctively headed toward my bed.

When he sat down, he posed a question for me, “I noticed that your boyfriend...”

“Sean.”

“Right, Sean, said that he loved you but you didn’t say it back, why?”

“Because I didn’t feel like it.”

“But he looked like...”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Like I’ve never said it before and that he was sort of hoping that I would say it now?”

“Yes, actually. Is that the case here?”

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

“Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to pry it’s just that...”

“No, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bite your head off. No, I haven’t said it before. I guess I’m just afraid of getting hurt.”

“Why, do you think he’d hurt you?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I’m more afraid of hurting him.”

“Interesting. Do you mind if I ask why?”

“Well, when you put it that way, I just don’t think that I love him. In fact I’m not even really sure why I’m dating him at all.”

“So why don’t you just break up with him?” He sounded pretty hopeful with those last few words of his. It was like he thought that there really was hope for us after all.

“I can’t just break up with him, because I don’t love him. I mean not everyone falls in love with the person they’re with right off the bat. It takes time.”

“Not always.” He was really egging me on. It seemed to me like he wanted me to say something specific, but I wasn’t going to give it to him that easily.

“Well I have to give him a chance.”

“Tell me something, if you would.”

“What?”

“How do you feel about... Sean?”

“Well I care about him, quite a change from how I felt before we started dating.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well back in high school...”

Interrupting, “You’ve known him since high school, and you’re only dating now?”

“Will you let me finish? Yes I’ve known him since high school, but that’s just it, he was really annoying. According to him it was his way of showing me that he liked me. Odd if you ask me, but who am I to say how he really felt? Anyway, when we got up here, I was still despising him only less so. It seemed that something had changed. I wasn’t really sure how to interpret anything, but I decided to pick up a hobby. It was my only refuge to try and get this guy out of my head, only it hasn’t really worked. Anyway...”

“I’m sorry, but what do you mean it hasn’t really worked?” He actually started to sound a little scared.

“What?”

“You said you were trying to get this guy out of your head, but it hasn’t really worked. Is he still there?”

“Yeah, kind of.”

“Well why don’t you go after him? Or was he your last boyfriend or something?”

“Wow, you ask a lot of questions.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be, I like the curious, it tells me that their brains actually work.” A smile spread across his face and once again I felt my knees get weak, good thing I was sitting. “Anyway, for your information, he was a bit unavailable at the moment and really hard to get to.”

“Well, what about now?”

“I’m not so sure anymore.”

“So what are you waiting for?”

“I don’t know.”

With that we just sat there. He had a pretty good point. He did make it quite clear to me the night before that he wanted me just as much as I wanted him. I mean he did break off his engagement for me. So why didn’t I just take the chance to be with him and see what it would be like? I guess that maybe I liked the chase. Maybe I just wanted him to know what it was like to be me for the last three years, although I wasn’t about to make him wait that long.

Or maybe, I was afraid of getting hurt, by him. I didn’t really know him and if he could just break off an engagement that easily, how could I be so sure that he wouldn’t do something like that to me? No one really falls in love that easily with someone, right?

[Baby_Girl89]

He finally broke the silence, “So what do you want to do?”

“I don’t know. You were the one who suggested a meeting.”

“I just needed an excuse to see you again.”

I disregarded his last remark and said, “Well I guess we could watch a movie or something.”

“Any good theaters around here?”

“I wouldn’t really know. Sean and I usually see a movie at the theater here on campus and their not playing anything tonight.”

“So what should we do?”

“Well I have some movies we could watch, if you don’t mind watching quote unquote chick flicks.”

“Not as long you’re with me.” I stared at him, but he didn’t seem to notice. “So does that mean we’ll be sitting here in your room?”

“I guess so.” I got up and went to go see if I could find anything good for us to watch. Then suddenly my 98º Heat It Up video fell down. I hadn’t noticed, but he did.

“So you’ve seen the video.”

Still looking for a movie, I said, “What?”

“Our video, you’ve seen it.”

I turned around and saw him smiling at me. It was a pretty worn out copy. I started to blush a little and said, “Yeah, so what’s it to ya?”

“Well it proves that you like me.”

“And what pray tell makes you say that?”

“Well as I can see from this copy, you’ve watched it quite a few times.”

“Maybe, but it’s not because I like you, exactly,” I said trying to contain myself.

“What then?”

“I confess, I’m in love with your brother, he’s the one I can’t get out of my head.” His face fell and he looked like he was about to die. “I’m just kidding Nick. Jeez, Louise. Although I do happen to think that he’s very cute. So I like the way you guys sound, so sue me.”

“Oh,” he answered still sounding a bit disappointed.

“Plus I liked seeing that you guys were still down to earth. It’s a very rare quality in superstars and that you guys can act like idiots too.”

“We’re not that big.”

“Your message boards would prove otherwise. Have you ever visited that thing?”

“Not really. I have a few times.”

“The girls are nuts about you in there.”

“What about you?” he asked looking hopeful once again.

I fell silent before answering with, “I plead the fifth. So anyway, how about Summer Catch?”

“Sure why not. Freddie cracks me up. He’s a great guy. You really should meet him sometime.”

“Are you telling me you know Freddie?”

“Of course.”

“So is that a yeah or a nay on Summer Catch?”

He looked thoughtful as a smile crept upon his face as he said, “Sounds good to me.” So I put the movie on and sat on my bed. He scooted closer. I started to scoot away. Then he just sat there for a few more minutes and then scooted over a little more. I decided to get up to find the remote. When I sat back down I moved to the other side of the bed. He started scooting closer to me in that direction. I didn’t know what to think. I quit bothering with it and he eventually managed to sit right next to me, not even an inch away. Our legs were touching and I swear it felt like an electric shock was surging through my body.

Although I have to hand it to him, not putting his arm around me. Not for lack of thought, mind you. I did see him look like he was going to, but then thought better of it. Maybe he had finally decided to respect my decision. I must admit I kind of hoped that he would have. But he was probably too much of a gentleman to truly go through with it.

During the movie I decided to make some popcorn. When I took it out, we started chowing down on it. There were a couple of times when we went for it at the same time and our hands touched. We’d look at each other and then look away. It was strange acting like two teenagers who just started dating when we were nowhere near that circumstance. But it felt natural, and real.

At that moment it never really occurred to me that maybe I should have told him that it just wasn’t going to work out. I probably should have, considering the age difference. But I don’t think it really mattered. Maybe he didn’t realize how much older he was from me. Besides three more years isn’t that bad is it, I mean Jessica was seven years younger what difference did three more make? A lot to some people. Did he know?

When the movie finished Nick broke the silence. “Man I love that movie.”

“Do you? What else do you love?” I asked. Sounds kind of flirty doesn’t it? Like I tell my friends I don’t know how to flirt and yet it seems to come naturally, but perhaps that’s the best kind.

“I probably shouldn’t say.” He looked sad.

“What? Jessica? Do you regret your decision?”

“No, to both questions,” he looked sadder.

I got concerned, “Did I say something wrong?”

“No, it’s not your fault I’m in love with you.”

“Don’t say that.”

“But it’s the truth.”

“Nick, do you realize you’re proclaiming love to a girl who’s ten years too young for you?”

“Well Jessica was seven years younger than me, so what? Three years doesn’t change much. Besides can’t you feel the connection?”

“I’m not going to answer that.”

“Why? It’s because I’m right, isn’t it?”

“Nick, it’s too early. I think it’s time that you left.”

“But I’ve only been here for two hours.”

“Maybe two hours too long.”

“What are you saying?”

“I don’t know. I’m sorry. I just need to think and clear my head. Would you mind leaving?”

“Can I call you later?”

“That’s up to you. Can you?”

“May I call you later?”

“Sure, if I don’t answer, just leave a message.”

“May I see you tomorrow?”

“You catch on quick. I have school tomorrow, but if I’m not busy, maybe. Why don’t you call me and I’ll tell you then?”

I walked him to the door. As I stood there and looked into his deep beautiful blue eyes I just knew he was what I was waiting for and yet I was still too afraid to really admit it to myself. “I’ll call you.”

“I’m sure you will. Bye.” I had such an incredible urge to say “I love you” but I just had to fight it. No matter how much I really did love him I just couldn’t risk it yet. I watched him walk off, whistling such a happy little tune. Didn’t sound like anything I knew, but hey he’s technically from a different generation. It didn’t occur to me that he could’ve been writing something.

[Baby_Girl89]

When I finally shut the door. I just stood there with my back to the door, thinking, What’s wrong with me? Here he finally is and I can’t get myself to tell him how I really feel. Why am I trying to fool myself with this foolish thought of staying with Sean, when in my heart I know I want to be with Nick? Nick’s not the idiot, I am. I walked to my bed and sat down. I could still smell him in my room. It was the greatest smell in the world. I started thinking, I should just break up with Sean now, before I hurt him later. It wouldn’t be right to string him along like this. But then a voice inside me said, Don’t worry about it, you worry too much. When it’s time everything will come into play.

I was going crazy. Here I was stuck in the worst position in the world. The guy I loved, loved me back, but I couldn’t tell hi m. The guy I was with loved me, but I didn’t love him. The smart thing would have been to break up with the one I didn’t love and be with one I did. However, I didn’t want to hurt the one I didn’t love because I did care about him, me and my conscience. It was really strange because I never in my whole life imagined it would ever turn out that way. I never thought that I would ever even consider dating Sean and here I was his official girlfriend. And I never really thought that Nick was gonna show up, so I had to move on. And then the moment that I do, that’s when he has to interrupt my life? Why couldn’t life be simple? Why didn’t Sean just break up with me? He couldn’t because he loved me, that's why. That, unfortunately, made it harder to deal with.

I figured by that time, he would have let go of the relationship, but no, he was willing to be patient with me. He could have moved on and have found someone better, but no he stuck with me. I couldn’t hurt him, I changed him. Since it was my doing he deserved the chance. He was proving to be a wonderful guy, but there was that nagging feeling that just said, “Stop it.” What was I supposed to do? After I got the chance to be with Nick, I still ended up not having it. What a life I lived.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 4~

Later that day, I was in a daze, I didn’t know what to think anymore. I was so confused I felt like my head was about to explode. I was pretty surprised that it hadn’t happened already. I still couldn’t fathom that I had actually met Nick. Not only that but he wanted me, little old me. Was I kidding myself, or did I actually think that it was possible for this to be happening to me?

I decided to take a nap to try and clear my head. I got about an hour’s worth of sleep when the phone rang. It was my roommate. “Hello, Jenn? It’s Carrie; I just called to tell you that I’m going to be out the rest of the week.”

“What about classes?”

“Oh don’t worry about that I’ve already talked to my professors about it, there’s no problem.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about it before?”

“I was going to, but then I forgot. Sorry, I know how you worry. Sometimes I feel like I’m living with my mom.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s not a bad thing. Besides I think you’ll make a great mom one day. My parents really appreciate that someone’s looking out for me out here.”

“Well have fun.”

“Don’t worry I will. See you in a week. Bye.”

“Bye.” Then I hung up the phone. So, I thought, I have an entire week to myself. Doesn’t this seem like a familiar situation? Happens to me a lot doesn’t it? At least she didn’t move out. My first roommate moved out on me because she needed the space. She was cool though.

I decided that I wasn’t about to get anymore rest so I got up and turned on the TV. Oddly enough it was turned to MTV. I had no idea why. I hardly ever watched that channel. Anyway, MTV had one of its famous news reports come on. Brian McFadden was giving the news, so of course I had to watch. I just stood there watching and listening to what he had to say. Not that I really cared, but they were always fun to listen to. Then a picture of Nick and Jessica popped up in the right hand corner.

“This just in, it has been reported that favorite music couple Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson are no longer together.”

I was still out of it. Once again I had forgotten that I actually knew him and said, “What!?”

“It’s true. The two were reported to date the wedding to be in October, but then they postponed it for business and personal issues.”

“How did these people find out so fast?” My memory seemed to be coming back.

And as if he was reading my mind Brian said, “Reports were made true when Ms. Simpson came home alone on a plane from Flagstaff. She saw Carson Daly in the plane and just started spilling. Jessica thought it best for this to be one way for her fans to find out. She’s also posting it on her site. To check out this piece of news log onto www...,” (http://www...,”) I stopped listening after that. I turned off the TV and just sat back down.

It just didn’t seem to make any sense to me. Why in the world would Jessica want to go around blabbing her problems to the world? Did she think that it would make it better for her or something? I mean when she was with Nick and some things happened she was quite content to keep quiet about it, but now that she’d lost him, the whole world has to sympathize? Well I wasn’t about to buy it for one minute. But I wasn’t about to give into Mr. Lachey’s seductive ways either, no matter how much I wanted to.

Snapping me out of my thoughts, the phone started ringing again. I was becoming quite the popular one.

I answered it, only to find Nick on the other side. I was beginning to think there was no way I was allowed to believe that the whole thing never really happened and that I was only dreaming. “Hi there, Jenn.”

“Hi, calling kind of early aren’t you? You only left about an hour ago.”

“I know, but I suddenly realized that I don’t have my jacket. Do you suppose you could look to see if I left it there?”

“Sure, hold on.” I started searching for the jacket while he talked to me. He kept asking me about whether or not I changed my mind or what I was planning on doing. And then I found it, under my bed. “Okay I found it. Do you want me to just hold it for you until you find some time to come and get it?”

“I can come and get it now, if you don’t mind.”

“You mean a strong guy from Ohio can’t survive the cold of Flagstaff?”

“Maybe, so what do you say?”

“It’s your choice.”

“I’ll be right over.”

“All right see you.” After I hung up the phone, it rang again. Stupidly I thought it was Nick. Don’t I ever learn my lesson? “Yes Nick.”

“Nick, this isn’t Nick. Who’s Nick?”

Of course, with my luck it turned out to be none other than my boyfriend Sean. “Sorry honey.”

“Well who is he?”

“No one you need to worry about.”

“I don’t like the sound of that. Is he the guy that was over at your place earlier?”

“Yes.”

“Well at least that means he’s gone.”

“Why did ya call Sean?”

“What, I can’t call my girlfriend anymore?”

“Well, that’s not what I meant, Honey, I just meant that I thought you were supposed to be working.”

“I am. I’m just on my lunch break.”

“Well then shouldn’t you be eating, instead of calling me? I don’t want you to starve yourself over me.”

“I uh…already ate,” he lied.

“Don’t start. I know you didn’t. Promise me you’ll eat as soon as we get off the phone.”

“All right, I promise. You know for a woman who sneaks around with other guys you sure do care a lot.”

“Sean Brandon Peterson, I cannot believe you just said that to me,” I said exasperatedly.

“I’m sorry. I just wish I could be with you, instead of here working.”

“You have a funny way of showing it and at least you are working. I definitely could’ve done worse.”

“That makes me feel better, thanks,” he said sincerely.

“I knew it would.”

“Well I better get going then. I love you. Bye.”

“Bye.” I did it again. I just couldn’t say those three little words to him. Problem was those three little words could do a lot of damage if they were said carelessly. And I’m not careless when it comes to the subject of “love.” The truth of the matter was as much as I cared about Sean I just didn’t love him, not the way he wanted me to anyway. I loved Nick. But I wasn’t willing to hurt Sean to be with Nick, and in saving Sean I was hurting the man I truly loved and myself. I don’t know why I was pushing for a way for me to fall for Sean when I ultimately knew it was something that would never happen.

Nick arrived moments later to get his jacket. But instead of leaving, he decided to talk to me. Apparently when I opened the door I had a sullen look on my face. “What’s wrong?” he asked, ever so kindly and sweetly, as he walked through the door to sit beside me.

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.”

“Well that’s just too bad; I’m going to worry about it. I broke up with my fiancée to be with you and I’m going to make sure you’re not feeling down.”

“Well you might have broken up with her, but it wasn’t for me.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You can’t tell me that deep down inside you didn’t feel that maybe that wasn’t the right relationship for you anyway.”

“Maybe, but it took me finding you to realize it I suppose.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“And you still don’t have me. Why don’t you try moving on then? Finding the right girl for you? Don’t use me as your excuse.”

“You’re not my excuse, you’re my reason and how on earth did this become a conversation about me?”

The look on his face when he said that put a smile on my face. I couldn’t help myself, moments later I started to crack up.

“What are you laughing about?” I just couldn’t contain it, it got worse and worse. Then he started to smile and laugh too. It was so contagious. I’m sure the people out in the hall probably thought that we were raving lunatics the way we were laughing. Then he said, “Well I’m glad I could make you laugh and smile. I was beginning to wonder where it was.”

I just turned to him and smiled even more. I didn’t and don’t know why but he just had that affect on me. “Well, I was beginning to wonder myself.”

“Now, do you wanna tell me what had you so down before?”

“No, not really, but I suppose I have to tell someone before I explode, and my best friend’s too busy for me right now.”

“Well then use me.”

My face had fallen during that, but I managed a slight little grin. “Well my boyfriend called.”

“Did something go wrong? Did he break up with you?” he asked, just a little too anxiously.

“Gee, don’t sound so sad,” I said sarcastically. “No nothing like that,” I continued normally, “It’s just that...”

“I’m listening, take your time,” he said patiently.

“Well it’s just that I had the perfect opportunity to tell him that I love him and I just couldn’t do it.” I quickly spit out before I had a chance to stop. Then after a slight pause I asked him, “Have you ever had that problem?”

“Believe it or not, I have. There were a lot of times that I could tell Jess that I loved her. I did, don’t get me wrong...”

I had to interrupt with, “Then why aren’t you still with her?”

He answered, looking deep into my eyes, with, “Because then I found you.” Then he continued with his explanation, “But then there were times when you would come into my mind and I just couldn’t find the words, especially just a few months ago.”

“Huh,” I let out. Then I sighed.

Taking a deep breath he interrupted my thoughts to say, “Well I guess I should probably get going. I mean you don’t want to spend all day with me.”

“You could convince me otherwise.” At that moment I just didn’t want him to leave. Was that wrong? It must have been. I mean I had a boyfriend already. I shouldn’t have been spending time with another guy, but it felt so right.

He just looked at me and said, “Well weren’t you the one telling me to leave before?”

I stood up and looked into his amazing deep blue eyes and said, “I’ve had some time to think, but if you feel like leaving I’m not going to pressure you to stay. I’m just saying that it’s an option this time.”

“Really well, are you sure? I wouldn’t want to be intruding in your space.”

“Oh I’m fine, but you’re making it sound like you’ve got other things to do, which you probably do, so maybe you should go after all.”

“No, no, I’ve got absolutely nothing to do,” then as if he were thinking about it, “except spend all the time in the world getting to know you,” then he added quickly, “as a friend, that is.” But I could tell he still wanted more. I could also tell that by saying that he was trying to show me that he respected my decision. He was making me feel at fault for him being 29 and still unmarried.

How I would have loved to have changed that for him right then and there, but it wasn’t my choice. Anyway, I told him about the MTV news report. He was quite baffled by what I had to say. He didn’t understand it either. He didn’t know why Jessica would go off telling their business so quickly. When something serious had happened between them it was usually her thought to keep it quiet until a little while later. For her to just tell Carson right off the bat was nothing like her.

“Maybe she intends on getting you back.”

“She can try. The best she’ll get out of me now is friendship. Maybe that’s all I’ve felt this entire time. Maybe that’s why I could say it at one time and not another.”

“Is that what you really think, Nick?”

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Then why pray tell, did you keep pursuing that relationship? I mean you proposed to the poor girl, just to break her heart? That couldn’t be true. I know I’d feel broken hearted.” Then realizing what I had just said, I quickly added, “I mean if a guy had dumped me for someone else, especially after being engaged to him.”

“Well thanks for making me feel worse than I already do.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that it’s just...”

“I know you were trying to make me see what I’ve done. But I’ve seen it already. I feel bad that I had to break up with Jess, but I couldn’t carry on with the charade after finding you. Imagine how much worse she would have felt if she found out about you after we were married.”

“Who says she would have had to have found out?”

“Because knowing my brother he would have said something to Jess about my ‘dream girl’.”

“Who’s to say, I’m really who you think I am? I could be some psychotic killer that hasn’t found her true potential.”

“Let’s just say it’s a gut feeling. And I’m pretty sure if you were a psychotic killer you wouldn’t be telling me that.”

“Maybe, but you never know,” I said in my most mysterious tone.

“I can also tell how kind you are by the fact that as much as it’s hurting you to be in this relationship with Sean you’re still in it because you don’t want to break his heart. You know that if he loses you, he’s going to be desperately hurt, and you’d rather hurt yourself.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t I? I was in the same situation. Trying to make something happen that just wasn’t going to work. Luckily I didn’t reach the point of no return.”

I smiled, “‘Point of No Return’ that’s a Phantom song. It’s one of my favorite musicals.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. My favorites from it are ‘Think of Me,’ ‘Phantom of the Opera,’ and ‘Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again.’”

“Can you sing any of them for me?”

“I don’t think you’d want to hear me sing. Anyway, where were we…ah yes, I’m not trying to spare his feelings.”

“Oh no, then what would you call it?”

My body tightened, and I felt like I couldn’t move. He trapped me, the fox. I had no idea how to answer him. I wanted to push him out of the room to avoid having to answer the question, but I still needed him with me. What was I suppose to do? I think he sensed my discomfort and decided to help me by changing the subject.

“Okay, you don’t need to answer it, but at least think about it. So how about we watch another movie?”

I felt my entire body relax and I could move again. “Sure, why not? What should we watch?”

A sly grin crept upon his face as he said, “98º Heat It Up.” I smacked his arm for that.

“Are you kidding me?”

“Yeah, I just wanted to see what you would do. Interesting experiment I’m never going to do again.”

“No wait, maybe we should. Then I can point out what a real dork you are.”

“Really?”

“Really.” Then he had this look of hunger in his eyes and he lunged at me. He started to tickle me like no tomorrow. I tried to retaliate, but I couldn’t seem to get to him. When he finally let up, I couldn’t let him go “Scott” free so that’s when I got him back. It was the most comfort I’d felt with a guy in I don’t remember how long. Nick made me feel alive and okay to just be me.

[Baby_Girl89]

When we finished our tickle fight, which I have to say he won, (he’s bigger and stronger than I am, you didn’t expect me to win did you, besides he fights dirty) I put the video in. We just sat and watched for a few minutes. After that I started to ask him questions about the video I swore I’d get answers to one day. He had some pretty interesting answers. I also pointed out some interesting things about the video and the music videos. He was very surprised about some of the feedback. He told me that he had never really sat down to watch it that way before. He said that it was nice to get some “fan” feedback, using the word “fan” quite casually. He knew how not to make me mad already. A skill Sean still hadn’t acquired after knowing me for almost four years.

When the video was finished, I asked, “So how did you like watching yourself on the video?”

“It was interesting. But it was more interesting watching you watching me on the video.”

“Okay.”

“And what were all those comments about my brother?”

“What, I can’t help it if I think he’s cute. Do you suppose I could meet him sometime?”

His face fell, “Well I suppose.”

“Why the sad face? Don’t make me bring out the tickle monster again.” With that he gave a smile, although I could tell he was trying to contain it. “There that’s what I want to see. Besides you have nothing to worry about, Drew’s a married man I know that. I wouldn’t do anything; I just think it would be cool to get to know him as a person, along with the other two, that’s all.”

“Really?”

“Yes really. You’re a very paranoid man you know that?”

“Actually, I’ve never behaved this way before.”

“You’re not going to blame that on me are you?”

“Maybe not completely.”

I sort of pushed him with my shoulder with that comment and then he started tickling me again. He ended up toppling over me and then he just stopped as he landed on top of me in that compromising looking position. I remember thinking to myself, Boy am I glad that Sean’s not here to see this. He just lingered there, for a while. I kept thinking, Is he going to kiss me? And then I sort of pushed him off of me. He apologized for not moving sooner. I told him it was all right. Then we just sat in silence for a while. My mind starting spinning a mile a minute, I was suddenly very aware of how close we might have come to doing something we shouldn’t have.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 5~


Nick ended up staying for another four hours. Then I heard a knock on the door. I went to answer it only to find Sean standing there. “Hey Baby.”

With a surprised look on my face I said, “Hi Sean.” I started to walk out of the room pushing Sean back.

“Why are you pushing me back? Can’t I come in?”

“Oh, I uh...um...”

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing, what makes you say that?”

“The fact that you can’t seem to answer my question about why I can’t go into your room.”

“Oh all right, I confess, my room is a mess and I can’t let you see it that way.”

“That’s crazy, you’ve been to my room a thousand times and you’ve seen the mess in there.”

“That’s different you’re a guy. I expect that from you.”

“Thanks.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Well maybe it’s time I see what your mess looks like,” emphasis on the mess.

“No, because then it would destroy the image of me being perfect in your eyes,” I said in mock distress.

“Nothing could ever destroy that image, but if it means that much to you, we’ll just stay out here.”

“I’m sorry Honey, I’m afraid we can’t do that either, I have a lot of studying to do and you know how important it is for me to do well.”

“Can’t we just talk for a little while?”

“No, Baby I’m quite bogged down.”

“All right I’ll go.” Then he bent to give me a hug, and I kissed him on the cheek. “I love you.”

“Okay, bye.” Then he walked off. I went into my room and saw Nick standing there with a grin on his face. “What’s with you?” I asked him.

“Nothing.”

“Oh no you don’t. Nicholas Scott Lachey you will tell me what you’re thinking right this instant.” Then I burst out laughing. I couldn’t believe I called him by his full name. Then he started laughing too. Laughter truly is contagious. When we finally stopped I said, “Seriously, what’s got you smiling like that?”

“Well I don’t want to sound like a bad person but I couldn’t help noticing that you didn’t tell him that you love him again,” emphasis on again.

My face dropped as I said, “That’s none of your business now is it?”

“Well no, but you asked.”

“True.” I looked at my clock and saw that it was getting to be quite late. “Nick I hate to do this but I think that maybe you should leave.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty late.”

“No I mean you hate to have to tell me that?”

“Look, don’t make this worse than it already is. Besides, knowing my boyfriend he’ll find an excuse to come back and I can only keep him away for so long.”

“Why didn’t you just tell him about me then?”

“Because I know that he probably would’ve gone nuts and I don’t really need that right now.”

“All right, well I guess I should get going then.”

“Hold on, I’ll walk you downstairs. Let’s hope to God that Sean’s in his room already.”

I walked Nick downstairs and as we got out of the door I spotted Sean standing at the front desk. I felt so evil, if I had just told him the truth, Nick and I wouldn’t be in the mess we were in. Why did I feel like I had to lie anyhow? It’s not like we were doing anything wrong, were we? Did my subconscious mind think that something had gone awry? No, I just didn’t want Sean causing a scene, right? At that moment I shoved Nick towards the back and told him he could go out the back way, and if he didn’t know what to do to just wait for me. So he backed up and out and waited for me patiently. I felt so bad for him. He would’ve done anything for me, still does in fact.

Anyway, I walked over to where Sean was and surprised him. “Boo.”

He turned around and a smile crept upon his face, “Hey, I thought you were doing you’re homework.”

“Well I came down to just give you a little surprise, but I expected you to be in your room. What are you doing up here?”

“Well I was on my way down when I decided to stop here and give the front desk a message, before I headed back. I was just about to leave. Wanna go down with me?”

“Actually, I forgot something in my room. You go on down and I’ll see you in a bit.”

“I can wait here.”

“Well, maybe you should go see if your roommate’s home or not,” and then I gave him a wink.

“Oh, okay," he replied getting the message. Then he kissed me on the cheek and was on his way. I think it finally cheered him up, after what had been happening over the past few days.

After I saw him go through the door I quickly went to the back where Nick was just sitting there, humming a tune waiting for me.

“Hiya, Handsome.”

Startled he said, “Oh, hi, you kind of took me by surprise there. So how did it go?”

“He went downstairs to his room and he’s waiting for me.”

“I take it, you handled everything pretty well.”

“Yeah I guess so.”

“Why didn’t you just tell him I was here? If he trusted you enough he shouldn’t have to get all crazy jealous.”

“It’s not me he doesn’t trust,” I said eyeing him. “Let’s not get into this again, okay? Come on I’ve got to get you out of here before he realizes he’s forgotten something, again.” So I took him by the hand and led him to the front entrance. I walked him out the door gave him a hug and we said our goodbyes.

I went back into my room trying to come up with a plausible explanation as to why I wanted to see him. Then I had the idea. I grabbed my criminal justice books and went downstairs. When I got downstairs and was out of the door to get into the lobby I spotted Sean coming my way.

“Sean why aren’t you downstairs?”

“I figured we’d have more privacy in your room.”

“Too late, I’m down here already let’s go to your room. Besides my room is a mess remember?”

“You didn’t clean it up yet?” he asked disappointed.

“Nope, it’s only been a little while.”

“Let’s go up anyway,” he said anxiously.

“No, I’m down here already, don’t make me walk up there again already.”

“All right then I’ll carry you,” he motioned to pick me up.

“Sean, stop it. Why can’t we just go to your room?” I said giggling.

“Because my roommate has company.”

“Why didn’t you just say so?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well we could just study here in the lobby.”

“You mean you actually wanted to study? Is that what the books are for?” I started to drag him to one of the couches to sit down.

When we reached it we sat down and then I answered him, “Yeah, what did you think we were going to do? These aren’t decoys. I don’t need those remember?”

“I don’t know I guess I was hoping that maybe...you know.”

“Sean, you’ll know when I’m ready and now is still not the time. I don’t know why you have to dwell on this stupid subject, it’s just kissing. It’s not like it would be the end of the world if we never kissed.”

“And would it be the end of the world if we did?”

“It might.” Then he started tickling me too. What was it with guys and this obsession with tickling me? Him, I could actually fight back with a bit better. It was a good thing I took him to a chair that was a little bit more out of the way. When we finally settled down I made us get to work. As much as I knew he hated studying I could tell he was okay with my plan.

When we finished he said, “I’m glad you decided to study with me.”

“I’m glad too. It was a lot more fun than trying to learn all this on my own.”

“Want me to walk you up to your room now?”

“That’s up to you Sweetie.”

So then he got up and held out a hand for me. I slipped my hand in his and pulled myself up. I had to admit that this was why I was still with him. Because he was there; and he had changed so much for me, for the better. I couldn’t just leave him for a guy who was ten years older than me. How was that supposed to make him feel? It would have been bad enough to leave him, but for Nick, that would have been so much worse. I should have known that my worst fears were going to get the best of me.

Sean walked me upstairs and he gave me a hug looked me in my eyes and said, once again, “I love you. You are the most beautiful woman on the face of this planet. I can’t believe that you’re even with me, but I’m sure lucky and glad that you are.”

“Oh Sean,” talk about a perfect moment to kiss him, right? I still couldn’t do it. What kind of a person strings a guy along like that? I wanted to kiss him, I think, but my subconscious mind just wouldn’t let me. I had Nick running through my head so wildly, like signs of not needing to kiss Sean. So I just hugged him again and gave him a light peck on the cheek. I wanted to say “I love you” to him too, but I didn’t feel that way, so all I could do was let him go and say, “All right, well bye and see you later.”

He walked off with a pretty disappointed look on his face. I went inside thinking that I was the cruelest person on the face of the planet. I also thought I was one of the stupid ones. Here was a guy who loved me and treated me like a queen and I had no feelings of love for him whatsoever. What was wrong with me?

Then I remembered why.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 6~


For the next couple of weeks I was spending more and more time with Nick. Sean wasn’t too happy about it, but he had to accept it and he appreciated the fact that I even told him about it. How could I keep it a secret from him? There was no point; I wasn’t cheating on him, just hanging out with a friend. A friend I was in love with, I had sometimes reminded myself. Sometimes, it made me feel guilty. Other times I never gave it a second thought.

During those couple of weeks I also spent as much time with Sean as possible. I found that I was developing more and more feelings for him. The way I thought I could. But it didn’t seem to matter in a way. If Nick hadn’t come along, it might have meant everything, but then I just didn’t know.

One Saturday, getting ready for a night with Nick I got a knock on my door. I thought, He can’t be here yet, it’s too early. But I answered the door anyway. It was Sean.

“Surprise, Baby,” he said to me as he held out a bouquet of roses and some chocolate.

Surprised I was, “Sean what are you doing here?”

“Can’t I come to see my beautiful girl?”

“You know what I meant, Honey. Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

“Well I requested the day off. I thought we needed to spend some much needed alone time.”

“Oh how sweet,” then realizing that he was still standing outside my door I motioned for him to come in, “I’m sorry, Baby come in.” So he came in and went straight to my bed.

“So what do you want to do today?”

“Do? Oh I don’t know.” My mind was spinning around in circles again like it had been doing a lot here lately. I had something to do that night already, be with Nick, but I couldn’t betray my boyfriend like that. I had to come up with a plan. What was I going to do? Nick wasn’t due for another two hours, so maybe I could be with both of them. Then I decided against it. My boyfriend deserved all my time. I had my plan. Then I returned to Sean and said, “You mean you want to spend time with me and you have nothing planned?”

“I figured I’d give you a choice before doing anything.”

“Well I don’t know what to do.”

“Then I guess I’m going to have to surprise you.”

“You’ve been doing that quite a bit there.” Then realizing that before I could leave I had to call Nick I said, “Honey I’m sorry, but I need to make a quick phone call, you don’t mind do you?”

“No of course not, go ahead.”

So I picked up the phone and dialed Nick’s number. He answered after two rings. “Hello?” he answered with a bit of happiness in his voice.

“Hi, can you hold on a minute?”

“Sure,” he responded cheerfully.

“Sorry Sean, but I need to take this call outside. Feel free to find something to do while you wait; watch some TV if you like.” I went outside my door, shut it and sat down. “Hello Nick.”

“Yes, Beautiful.”

“Um...” I waited for the sound of the TV to come on, and sure enough it did. “I can’t see you tonight. I have to cancel our plans.”

“You do?” he asked sounding suddenly disappointed.

“Yeah, my boyfriend wants to spend some time with me today and well the truth is I have been seeing more of you than him so I think he deserves this.”

“Oh,” he said in a very disappointed tone. I felt really bad for him. He probably had our whole evening planned out and then I had to go and ruin it.

“Well how about we schedule it for another time?” I asked hoping that it would make him feel better.

“Tomorrow?” he said hopefully.

“Sure, why not. And I promise not to let anything interfere with our plans. Okay?”

“Okay, well have fun with your boyfriend then. And if he does anything to hurt you in any way...”

Interrupting him I said, “You’ll get him, I know. You sound more and more like my best friend Alex everyday.”

“So see you tomorrow then?”

“Definitely. Bye.”

“Bye, Beautiful.” Then I hung up the phone. I couldn’t help but feel a little strange about the day and about what was supposed to happen between me and Sean. I was going to find out why.

After my phone call with Nick I got up and went back into my room. I found Sean watching the cartoon network. I went to sit beside him on my bed.

“So you got everything taken care of?”

“Of course,” I said as I kissed him on the cheek. I still don’t know what I was waiting for. Well maybe I do now, but it didn’t really seem to work then, maybe somehow I did know all along.

Then he turned off the TV got up reached his hand out to me and said, “Your chariot awaits milady.” So once again I slipped my hand into his and then I realized I didn’t know whether or not I was dressed right. I didn’t feel like I was dressed right. I was wearing a t-shirt and jeans and he was wearing a polo shirt and khaki pants. I really don’t think it fit.

So I said to him, “Honey before we leave maybe I should get dressed.”

“You look dressed to me.”

“I meant dressed to fit whatever scene we’re going to, besides I want to look beautiful for my man.”

“You already are beautiful. Besides, what you’re wearing is fine.”

I looked at him and said, “Is it?”

He said, “Don’t worry; no matter what you wear you will always be the most beautiful woman in the place.”

“Why don’t you just tell me where we’re going, so that I can dress appropriately?”

“Because that will ruin the surprise.”

“You sly dog,” I gave him a smirk and he bent down to kiss me and I moved my head. Sly dog he was, but I was still too quick for him.

“So I guess we should get going.”

“You still haven’t told me what I should wear yet.”

“I told you what you’re wearing is fine Jenn. So let’s go.” He smiled at me and I actually warmed up inside, which is kind of nice when you live in Flagstaff. So off we went. When we got to the lobby he told me to wait there for him because he had to do something in his room real quick. So I patiently waited for him. His quick ten minutes still gave me a lot of time to think to myself. I found that for some reason or other I was feeling really guilty about something, but I didn’t know what. Was it because I had broken off my plans with Nick or that I felt I had to hide the fact that I had plans with Nick to begin with. It wasn’t making any sense to me. When Sean finally came back he had changed his clothes. “Does this make you feel better?”

[Baby_Girl89]

I stood up and said, “It does actually, but now people are going to think that we’re trying to match.”

“Who cares, what’s it matter what other people think anyway? I just want to make you happy,” he replied smiling down at me.

“Oh, how sweet. I never would've imagined in a million years, that we’d be this way.”

“Oh I imagined it; I just thought it was impossible. Now you’ve shown me that nothing is impossible,” he said to me.

“I guess we can go now.”

So we headed out the door and to his car. He drove around for a while and finally stopped. “Well here we are,” he said to me.

I looked around to see a very unfamiliar place. “But where is here, Sean?”

“A park where we’re going to have our picnic.”

“A picnic?” I asked shocked that he would come up with something so romantic.

“Yep, that’s why it didn’t matter to me what you wore.”

“You are so unpredictable. Every time I think I know what your next move is you pull a stunt like this.” I moved to embrace him in a hug. Then we got out of his car and he went to the trunk to retrieve our stuff and we went to find a spot to sit. We found a little out of the way place that was nice and secluded. We started eating and talking about everything. It was almost like a catching up time. As much time as we had spent together, it was just being together, nothing like this, getting to really talk about our lives what we’ve been missing out on with each other. The picnic was something we most definitely needed. I felt that it helped us to connect even more, even though later it would prove to be pretty useless.

When we finished talking and eating, we gathered everything up to return to his car. After we put everything away, he took my hand in his looked into my eyes and said, “Let’s go for a walk.” By the tone in his voice I could tell he was planning on talking to me about something very important on this walk of ours.

“Okay,” I said slightly startled by the serious tone in his voice, so we started walking.

“I need to talk to you about something.”

“I could tell, but what could you possibly have to tell me now that we’ve shared that wonderful little picnic time together?”

“I can think of something,” he announced solemnly.

“Okay, so tell me.”

“All right I’m just going to say it. I think that there’s something wrong with this relationship. We’ve been falling apart. I mean aside from today, it’s felt like nothing.”

“What are you saying Sean? Are you breaking up with me?” I think somewhere inside me I was hoping for that to be what it was. But it still would’ve hurt, and yet it was also saying it would be for the best. I think it was my internal Nick.

“No, far from it. I love you too much to just let you go. I’m willing to work on this relationship if you are. It’s just that we haven’t been spending enough time together. Not as much as I’d like anyway.”

“That’s not my fault. You’re always working. Besides I broke off a meeting with Nick to be here with you today,” I stopped; I wasn’t supposed to say anything but it slipped. I could only hope that he didn’t catch it. Why was he making me feel like I was cheating on him? I hadn’t physically done anything wrong. Maybe it was my guilt in loving Nick.

“I know it’s not your fault but...” then with no such luck it seemed to just sink in and he said, “Did you say you broke off a meeting with Nick to be here today?”

I got really quiet and I still couldn’t believe I had just told him the truth. My guilty mind was hitting me again but not the way it would from relief. I was beginning to wonder if maybe it was because I had broken off my plans with Nick and not for keeping the truth from Sean. “Answer me Jenn,” he said in more of a pleading voice than an angry one. By then we had stopped walking.

I finally spoke up, “Yes,” I said in almost a whisper.

“So that’s who you were talking to. That’s another thing; you spend way too much time with this guy. I think you’ve spent more time with him in these past couple of weeks than you have with me in the past four years.”

“First of all we’ve only been dating for a little more than five months so comparing it to the last four years is a bit outrageous.”

“Well I guess I was counting classes.”

“But anyway lately it’s only because you’re working all the time. Don’t you know how hard it was for me to break off my plans with Nick today?”

“Why? Is it because you’d rather be with him?”

That comment hit me so hard, “Sean how dare you say that to me. I thought you knew me better than that. I guess I was wrong. You should know it’s because I had plans with him first and I don’t like doing things like that, but I did today, because it meant that I got to spend more time with you and here you are giving me the damn third degree.” Tears started to stream down my face. Why did he have to do that to me? After the wonderful day we had shared and the connection I was sure was there. It probably would have been better if he just decided to break up with me. At least then I could have gone on without feeling guilty and he wouldn’t have been doing this to me. I should have known it would have come to that. I was just so taken in by everything he’d done for me.

He just looked at me, and then he started to wipe away my tears. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just felt so bad that you were spending more time with him and I was afraid that I was going to lose you.”

I started to laugh through my tears a little, “Sean you worry too much. Nick is just a friend. You’re the one I’m with, not him.” Then he pulled me into an embrace that felt like everything was going to be okay after all. He finished wiping my tears away and we walked back to his car. We got in and he drove away.

When we got back to the dorms he walked me up to my room. I let myself in and we said our good-byes. He said, “I love you,” hugged me one last time and walked away. He didn’t even try to get his kiss this time. I’m sure he knew he’d screwed up.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 7~


The next morning I woke up with a headache. I had spent the rest of the night from before trying to figure out how to solve my problem. I came to the conclusion that if I were to really find out whether Sean was the one or not I had to kiss him. Then I could make a conscientious decision. I probably fell asleep trying to come up with a plan. When I went to sleep I started to relive the day, exactly as it had happened, all good and bad things. Then when I had slipped into total unconsciousness this is what I came up with.

I was in the kitchen baking cookies with my eldest son and eldest daughter. I was dressed in what looked like a fifties mom outfit. It was quite interesting, I had the dress and apron on and everything. Anyway the first thought to run through my mind in seeing that was “Who’s the father?” Anyway we were making a mess, but it was nice being with my children.

My daughter then asked me, “Mommy, when is Daddy coming home?”

“I’m not sure Sweetie, but I’m sure he’ll be home soon.”

“Mom,” my son asked, “Are we making these cookies for Dad?”

“Not really, but if he shows up today it certainly will be a nice surprise for him won’t it? Okay now, you two keep mixing the batter, while I go check on the cupcakes.”

I watched as my two beautiful children continued to work extra hard to make sure that the cookies came out right. They both had flour all over themselves from the cupcakes it was such sight to be seen. I could feel this unconditional never ending love for them. As I went to check on the cupcakes I heard the door open and a voice call out, “I’m home everyone.”

“Daddy’s home,” my daughter shouted. She almost jumped out of her seat.

“Calm down, Belle,” it was a nickname for Jesabel.

“Sorry Mommy.”

“It’s okay Honey.”

“Can I go see Daddy now?” she asked me.

“No, stay here and finish up. I’ll go get Daddy; he’ll be so surprised to see the two of you baking.”

Then with a really wide grin on her face she said, “Okay Mommy.”

“All right, now Anthony, you watch your sister okay. You’re in charge make sure nothing goes wrong.”

“Got it Mom.” Then before I left the kitchen I told the cook to watch over my children. You didn’t think I would leave two little kids in the kitchen alone did you? Then I left the kitchen through the door and caught my husband before he went anywhere. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. My husband was...Nick.

He looked so handsome in his business suit. He had the biggest and brightest smile when he saw me. We embraced in a hug and engaged in a mad passionate kiss of love. When we released each other, we just lingered there staring at each other, like the first time. When I finally found the words to speak I managed a, “Hiya Handsome.”

He answered back with, “Hey there Beautiful.”

Then we embraced each other again as I said, “I missed you so much, but I didn’t expect you home so early.”

In the release of the embrace he said, “I couldn’t stand to be away from the people I love much longer so I had to come back as soon as I could. I’ve missed you Beautiful. It was so hard for me to go to sleep last night.” Then as if he suddenly realized what I was wearing he said, “What is this? You in a dress, willingly, with no place to go?”

“Yeah got a problem with that muscle man?”

“No. Just shocked. But I must say you do look damn sexy in that outfit. Better be careful or I might be tempted to undress you right here right now.”

“Don’t you dare,” I said giggling in his arms. Everything felt so right, to just stand there in his arms and feel his love.

He snuggled his face into my neck and then pulled away asking, “Where are the kids?”

“Belle and Anthony are in the kitchen baking cookies.”

“And the other four?”

“Are in their rooms taking a nap. You know it was pretty hard for me to go to sleep without you last night too. I think the kids sensed it and all six of them came to comfort me.”

“Lucky kids.”

“Oh you. You’re the best you know that, Lachey?”

“No, you are. I love you Mrs. Lachey.”

“I love you too.” With that we kissed again. It was like magic every time it happened. And it made me want to do just what he wanted to right then and there.

When we finished he said, “Well I’m gonna go get changed and meet you and the kids in the kitchen.”

“Oh no you’re not,” I said as I started to tug him towards the kitchen, “You’re coming with me dressed just the way you are. No point in changing when you won’t be wearing it for very long anyway.”

“Are you saying what I think you’re sayin?” he said sounding surprised and quite pleased, I nodded as he continued, “Why I do think you’re trying to seduce me Mrs. Lachey.”

“Why yes I am, it’s working isn’t it?”

“Quite,” he said with a big grin.

When we got into the kitchen Belle was the first one to notice us come in and she ran to her father screaming, “Daddy, you’re home.”

He picked her up and said, “Hi Princess, did you miss Daddy?”

“Of course Daddy, we all did,” then as if she were whispering some big secret she said, “But I think Mommy missed you the most.”

Nick looked at me and gave me a wink. “Well I really missed my princess,” then he put her down and looked at Anthony, “Hiya Sport, how you doing?”

“I’m good Dad. Did you have fun on your trip?” he asked trying to sound sophisticated.

“Yeah lots, but I really missed my family,” he said while rubbing the hair on Anthony’s head.

Then turning around in his chair and standing up Anthony hugged his dad’s legs. “I missed you too Dad.”

“Jeez the way you people act you’d think I was gone for a month. I was only gone for two days.” Then he bent down to give Anthony a proper hug.

“All right you two, enough. Anthony, Belle, have you two finished up?” I asked. They both nodded. “Okay then let me put these in the oven and you two get cleaned up and we’ll have the cupcakes and cookies for after dinner. You two need to go take your naps now.”

“Yes, Mommy,” they said in unison.

I put the cookies in the stove and then Nick came up behind me and started to kiss my neck. “Nicky, not yet Baby.”

“You’re right I should get you upstairs first.” Then he picked me up the way he did when we were newlyweds and started to walk me out of the kitchen.

“Make sure to watch over the cookies for me Rosita,” I had to yell over Nick’s shoulder to the cook.

As he marched me upstairs I said, “Nicky, don’t you want to see your other children?”

“But aren’t they asleep?” he asked hoping to just get to the bedroom.

“Well yes, but...”

“You’re right.” So he held me and took us into the direction of our children’s rooms. When we reached the first room he finally put me down. “My little angels,” Nick said, “Daddy’s home.” Then he looked at me and said, “Every time I leave I realize how much more I love my children.” He kissed the two little girls and we walked out of the room. Then we reached the next room and we were with our other two little boys, “Look at them Jenn, they look so peaceful. I hate staying away.”

“I know you do Baby, but it’s part of your job and it’s not like you’re gone for long. Besides it always makes your stays that much better. It’s taught me to appreciate the time that we do have together.”

He kissed them on the foreheads and then picked me up again. “Well I suppose it’s time to prove our love again.” I just kissed him and we were on our way to our bedroom on the other side of the house. When we reached our room, Nick kicked open the door, walked through and kicked it shut behind him. Then he reached behind to lock it. Then he walked over to the bed and gently put me on the bed and then...well you can imagine what happened next.

[Baby_Girl89]

That’s when I woke up, with a headache no less. Why did I have that strange albeit imaginatively fantastic dream? That’s why I had my headache. I didn’t understand how I could be with Sean and be thinking about Nick in those ways. So I’d dreamt about them before, but at least I wasn’t with anyone. Now the dreams seemed almost wrong, like they were bringing on feelings of guilt and didn’t I feel that way enough already? But why should they, I wasn’t the only one who could be with someone and think of someone else, but before Nick wasn’t a reality either.

I woke up and just sat there for a while, when the phone rang. I thought it was going to be Alex telling me she was going to come over, but I was wrong.

“Hello?” I answered; I didn’t want to take any chances this time in case I was wrong.

I was quite wrong when the voice on the line turned out to be quite masculine. “Hey, how’re you doing? Are we still up for tonight?”

“Yeah um...” I had to think of what I was putting myself into, then I suddenly realized that it was Nick. I wasn’t so sure I should’ve said yes anymore.

“Okay, so I’ll see you around five.”

“Five?”

“Yeah, something wrong?”

“No, it’s just that I’m not used to going anywhere so early in cases like this but then again...”

“What?”

“Nothing, never mind.”

“No what, come on I wanna know.”

“Too bad, I’m not going to tell you. Bye.”

“But...”

“No ifs, ands, or buts about it now bye.”

“All right, bye,” and we both hung up.

I had no idea what I was going to do. How was I supposed to face Nick when I had the dream from the night before? It was definitely going to be awkward; at least that’s what I had thought. I decided I needed to get ready or at least take my shower, so I went and took one. When I was finished I had to decide what to wear for that night. I had no idea what we were supposed to do. When I finally picked out something to just lounge around in there was a knock at my door. I quickly threw the clothes on and opened the door. It was Sean, with more flowers.

“Hello Beautiful,” holding out the flowers he said, “These are for you.”

“Thank you they’re beautiful. But what are they for?”

“An apology for last night. I should’ve realized when you told me you broke off plans with Nick to be with me that you weren’t trying to hurt me and well... I’m sorry.”

Acting shocked I said, “Did I just hear you say what I think you said?”

“Yeah. Mind if I come in?”

“No, of course not.”

“So what do you want to do today?”

“Sorry Sean, that’s not going to work today. If you want to know the truth I’ll just tell you right now, I have plans to be with Nick.”

“What!? We just reconciled and you’re going off to be with him?”

“Sean stop acting like a brute. I told you already he and I are just friends. Why do you always get so...agh. I can’t even think straight anymore. I thought you understood that last night. I broke it off with him last night and that was hard enough. I’m not going to do it again. It’s not my fault you like being so damn spontaneous at the wrong time. Just leave me alone. Get out of here now.”

“Wait, I’m sorry.”

“That’s not gonna cut it now Sean, I need some time to think.” I slammed the door in his face. I turned around with my back to the door and slid down. And as the tears rolled down my face I started to reevaluate the situation. Why was I still with him? He was always so jealous. Was it worth not hurting him to hurt another who loved me, as well as hurting myself? I don’t think two for the price of one is really fair in this case. I really thought we were connecting. How could I have been so wrong?

I moved to my bed and became so unproductive until two hours before Nick was to arrive. Then I finally decided to move. I decided to make this a night to forget all of my problems with Sean and just to have fun with my friend Nick. The friend I was denying my feelings for, the friend who happened to love me and always found a way of telling me so, the friend that should have been more than a friend. Maybe Nick was right. But I didn’t want to think about that, my headache had only just subsided and I didn’t want another one making its way in.

When it was 4:30P.M, I was finally finished. I got a knock on my door and I thought, Is he early again? When I answered the door I got a nice surprise. My best friend Alex was standing there.

“Hey girl, it’s great to see you. I wasn’t expecting you today.”

“Thought I’d drop by, had to give you the book sooner or later today.”

“Oh I was just going to go over to switch it.”

“In that?” she said as she noticed what I was wearing. “Don’t tell me, you have a date with Sean.”

“No.”

“A date with Nick then,” she said more as a statement than a question.

“It is not a date.”

“What would you call it then, when two people are spending time together alone the way you two do?”

“Plans, hanging out?”

“Plans? Hanging out? Whatever, you’ve been in love with Nick since you were fifteen and here he is, willing to give up any and everything and you’re still with Sean?”

“But...”

“But nothing Jenn. He loves you, you love him, you two should be together. I know I’ve had my problems with the guy before, but he’s here now. Jenn you’ve been so down lately, I don’t understand why you want to pursue this crazy relationship you have with Sean. The only times I’ve ever seen you happy is when you talk about the times you’ve spent with Nick.”

“Kind of ironic huh? Nick used to make me so miserable and now he’s the one keeping me happy and sane.”

“It’s because you love and belong with him.”

“But what about Sean?”

“What about Sean?”

“I don’t want to hurt him.”

“I think he’s hurt you more than that already by now. I knew I shouldn’t have let this happen. Sure it was fine at first, but the first notice of you with another guy and he goes bezerk, he better consider himself lucky that he has you to protect him.”

“Alex,” I said giving her a stern look.

“I know, I know.”

“So what are you trying to say?”

“Like you don’t know. I’m saying break this thing off with Sean and give Nick the chance he deserves. You both deserve to be happy and that’s only going to happen when you realize you can’t keep Sean happy by keeping yourself miserable.”

“But Alex we connected last night. We really did, at least I thought we did. Maybe if I just give him one more chance...” I took a breath to gather my thoughts.

Alex decided to jump in before I could continue, “Look I can’t run your life for you, only give you advice, what you decide to do with it is your choice.”

“Well thanks anyway.”

“No problem. I better get going I have things I need to do before church. I just needed to take a walk and see a friendly face. Have fun with Nick tonight.”

“Don’t worry I will. Wait I thought you felt uncomfortable in that church.”

“I do but me and the big guy have some unfinished business.”

“Oh okay,” I walked her to the door. We said our good-byes and she went away. I sat there thinking. Nick still had ten minutes left. It was strange because it was the first time Alex had said anything about this whole situation. There was a time when she thought that I could still do better, but to flat out tell me this? It wasn’t like her. That’s how I knew she was being quite serious about everything she had to say. Five minutes left and there was another knock on the door. Right on time. I opened the door and saw the most gorgeous smile I’d seen in ages looking down at me. “Hey there Beautiful.”

[Baby_Girl89]

He handed me the most gorgeous flowers I had ever seen. “Nick these are so beautiful.”

“Not as beautiful as you. I tried finding some, but the harder I looked the uglier they got. Nothing will ever be as beautiful as you.”

“Better watch out Nick or you’re going to give me a big head.”

“Impossible. So are you ready for some fun?”

“Yep. Just let me put these away first.” I found a vase from the many I’d collected over the course of knowing the two and put the water in and then the flowers and then we were ready to go.

First Nick took me out to eat. We went to a nice Italian restaurant, the one we’d met in, to be exact. I ordered quite a hearty meal. I was so hungry. What’d you expect, I missed breakfast and lunch. Nick was happy to see that I was eating, he usually couldn’t get much out of me or should I say in me. I wasn’t usually hungry around Nick; I guess you could say he took my appetite away.

When we finished we went for a walk around my campus. It was around seven when we arrived on campus and the moon was already out. It was such a beautiful night. The moon was full and the sky was clear. However, it was a bit colder than I expected it to be. Even though I was wearing a jacket it didn’t seem to be enough. When we finally stopped walking and just stood still to look at the moon and the sky Nick seemed to sense my coldness and he wrapped his arms around me to keep me warm. I think it might have been from the fact that I was shivering. It felt so good to be in his arms. Much different from the way I had felt the night before. I didn’t understand why I was fighting it so much.

Looking at the moon I started to think about the night before and that morning and my face fell. Apparently Nick noticed and he said, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said as I forced a smile onto my face.

“Don’t lie to me. Something’s wrong, I can see it in your eyes. You might be smiling but your eyes are telling me a different story. So what’s wrong?” I wouldn’t respond. So he said, “Okay, don’t tell me, but if you don’t tell me I can’t help you.”

I couldn’t help but genuinely smile at that comment. “I don’t want to involve you in my problems.”

“I’m already more involved than you want me to be. Just tell me already. It hurts me to see you in pain.”

“How do you always know what to say?”

“It’s because I love you,” he said, with so much sincerity it scared me. He didn’t even have to think twice about saying it.

As cold as I was when he said that, I had to pull away. “You don’t mean that,” I said to him.

“Yes I do, now get back here before you freeze to death. You knew that from the moment we met. It hasn’t kept you from hanging out with me.”

“I know you’ve told me that since the moment we’ve met, but Nick I was just an excuse for you not to marry Jessica.”

“No you weren’t.” Then he came after me and put his jacket on me.

“Nick, take your jacket back before you freeze.”

“No I’d rather freeze than have you freeze; besides I’m used to this weather.”

“Yeah and that’s why you’re shaking right now,” I said sarcastically.

“What’s it matter to you?” he asked with a mixture of emotions.

“Because Nick, I care about you. Now take your jacket back.” I took off his jacket and tried to hand it back to him. He took it, put it on, and grabbed me to keep me warm. Instead of resisting, I just melted in his arms.

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong now or what?”

Not realizing what was going on anymore I slipped into a daze. I found myself quite content in his arms, then without any realization I muttered, “I love you Nick.”

Then I heard him say, “What did you just say?”

That’s when I snapped out of it and said, “Huh?” Then I looked up into his beautiful blue eyes and saw the glimmer of hope.

“You said you love me.”

“No I didn’t,” I quickly denied. Then I thought, What did I just do?

“Yes you did, I heard you,” he insisted.

“You’re hallucinating,” I faltered.

“No I’m not, I distinctly heard you say, ‘I love you Nick.’”

“Why would I say that?”

“I don’t know, you tell me. Do you?” He stared at me and I had to look away.

I had to think for a moment. What was I supposed to tell him? Yes Nick I do love you, I’ve loved you for the past three years of my life. Or no, it was just a slip of the tongue, even if I said that he wouldn’t believe me. Finally I said, “I can’t say.”

“But why? It’s a simple question that only requires a simple yes or no answer. Do you love me?” He asked anxiously again. I knew what I wanted to tell him, to end the whole mess but I just couldn’t. And simple, did he really think that love was a simple thing or was it that deciphering it was simple? Or could it have been that since he was so sure of his love for me that to him it felt like it would be a simple answer? I looked at him with pleading eyes and then he said, “Tell me what’s wrong.”

And then tears started to fall again. It was the strangest thing I’d ever experienced, crying in front of two guys in two nights when I’d usually spend my time crying to myself. “Please tell me what’s wrong.” And suddenly rain clouds started to form and it started to sprinkle.

“All right I’ll tell you,” I just couldn’t contain it anymore. He was being so gentle, “Last night Sean and I got into a fight about you.”

“About me?” he asked genuinely surprised.

“Yes, he thinks he’s going to lose me to you. I told him it was ridiculous,” I said with my voice cracking on nearly every other word.

“Oh really?” he asked with a mixture of confusion and disappointment in his voice.

Then I quietly whispered, “But I don’t know anymore.”

“What do you mean?” he asked sounding hopeful again.

“What I mean is Nick...” I paused, I wasn’t sure of how to go on and then, I just let it all out, “I love you, I’ve always loved you and nobody else. You were right, I did say it, I didn't mean to but I guess my heart just took over. You were the man that I’d been waiting for. I love you and only you.” It started to rain harder and then Nick pulled me into a kiss. I kissed him back the way I’d always wanted to. It was everything that I’d imagine it would be and so much more. He kissed with such fiery passion and love that I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. It was all I could think about. And then I remembered: Sean.

I pulled away from him and said, “We can’t do this.”

“Why not? I love you, you love me, this is naturally what we should do.”

“Because I’m with Sean not you.”

“But you should be with me.” Then as if realizing that it was raining he picked me up and took me to a sheltered place on campus. I just held on tight.

When we got there he put me down. “Nick I want to be with you, more than anything in this world, but I’m with Sean,” it didn't seem to occur to me that I should break up with Sean.

“Then break up with him. We belong together, not you and him, especially now.”

I thought for a bit and said, “You’re right, I guess I have to break up with him then, especially now.” Then I looked up at him and said, “Do you still want me?”

Looking at me with the utmost sincerity in his eyes he said, “More than anything in this world. I can’t believe you love me.”

“More than anything Nick. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, we may have lost a month but we have the rest of our lives to make up for it.”

“I love you.” And then the happy tears started to flow, again.

“I love you too, Beautiful.” Then he kissed me again and I knew that I was finally in my happy place.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 8~


After our little escapade outside in the cold we finally decided it was time to let me go home. I needed to tell Sean the truth, but the question was when? Should I just go and tell him right away or should I tell him later? I was really confused about what to do. It was a Sunday night, I had classes the next morning, but if I put it off, Sean would really be hurt. I was in quite a pickle.

Nick and I said our good-byes at the door to the dorm hall. I decided to just get it over with, right then and there. So I walked in dripping wet from the rain and braced myself. I walked downstairs and went to Sean’s room and knocked on the door. His roommate opened the door.

“Hi, you must be Sean’s girl.”

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“Are you kidding me, he keeps showing me pictures and tells me to stay away from you. Why are you all wet?”

“Long story. Listen, could you get Sean for me?”

“Wish I could, he isn’t here right now.”

“Oh where is he, is he still at work?”

“Yeah he is. He should be back in about an hour. Want to leave a message?”

“Tell him Jenn needs to talk with him and that it’s urgent.”

“All right.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem, man as wet as you are, you sure are pretty in person.”

“Um...thanks, I think.” Then I walked away. I found that to be a pretty strange conversation. I also found it strange that in all the time I’d been dating Sean that was the first time I’d ever encountered his roommate, but it wasn’t about to be the last.

I went upstairs dried myself off and relived the day. I took out my diary and started writing.

Areana, (if Anne Frank can call her diary Kitty I can call mine Areana.)

You’ll never believe what happened to me today. It’s finally happened, Nick and I are together. I never thought in a million years that it would actually happen and now it finally has. I’m so happy. The only problem is I still have to tell Sean. I don’t think I could stand to break his heart but I don’t have a choice. It’ll be worse if I just keep dating him letting him think I want to be with him. There would be no point. I’ve been lying to myself ever since Nick came into my life. To be honest I shouldn’t have dated Sean to begin with. But that was before I knew that Nick even had a chance of showing up into my mediocre life.

What am I going to do? I’ve finally found my happiness but at the expense of hurting someone that I do care about. I wish you could tell me what to do. I’m so confused right now.

Nick makes me happier than I ever even imagined I could be with him. It was so amazing tonight. Our first kiss came from what felt like nowhere but it was magical. I knew in an instant that he was definitely the one I wanted to spend my whole life with, the one I’d been waiting for this whole time. He makes me feel so good about myself and not at all the way Sean can make me feel. He inspires me to be everything that I am, not just what other people envision me to be. I need to be with Nick, but I need to figure out how to gently break Sean’s heart. And I don’t think it’s going to be a very easy task considering what he’s been fearing has finally come true.

But I can’t put it off forever. I guess I’m just going to have to tell him as soon as possible and hope for the best. I should have broken up with him when I first met Nick, but how was I supposed to know he’d turn out to be everything I imagined him to be? So anyway wish me luck.
Love,
Isabel
(A girl can dream about being a star can’t she? It’s my “stage” name.)

When I put my diary away and was about to get ready to go to bed there was a knock at my door. I opened it and Sean was standing there with a look of concern on his face.

“Baby, what’s wrong, my roommate told me you had something urgent to tell me.”

I had gotten really groggy and I couldn’t seem to think straight. It wasn’t the type of condition I should’ve been in to tell him what I had to say. “Sorry Sean,” I said yawning, “I can’t talk right now. I’m really tired.”

“But my roommate said that it was urgent.”

Yawning again I said, “But it can wait.”

“But it’s urgent,” he looked so concerned. I couldn’t break his heart that way, I had to wait.

“It’s not that urgent. Let me get a good night’s sleep, clear my head and then I’ll be conscious of whatever it is I’m telling you.”

“Well then, sleep tight. And remember I’ll always love you.”

“All right good night.” And I closed the door. This time his words finally hit me. How could I break his heart like this? Why did he have to love me? This time I would be going to sleep with the headache. But luckily I was going to wake up without it. I went to sleep thinking about how hard it was going to be to break up with Sean. I had the whole thing played out in my head.

I went to his room after classes on Monday after having a little talk with Alex. She told me, “It’s the right thing to do, Jenn. You have to tell him sooner or later, and sooner is always better than later. Don’t make it anymore miserable than you have to. Break up with him right away, so you and Nick can have the life you deserve.”

“I know what I should do, but you know how hard this is for me. I’ve never had to deal with this before.”

“Well as they say there’s always a first for everything.”

“I guess. But why did there have to be one for this?”

“To help your daughter when she has to break about a million guys’ hearts.”

“Ha, ha, very funny.”

“Stop stalling and leave already.”

“I’m going, I’m going.”

So I left her room and hopped on my bike and went home. I dropped off my things and took a deep breath before I headed downstairs to do something I dreaded. When I got to his room and knocked on the door, he answered it. Once again he had that look of concern on his face as he said, “Honey, what’s wrong.”

I looked him in the eyes and tears started to well up in mine. I didn’t seem to have the courage, but I knew what I had to do, “Sean, please don’t make this harder than it already is.”

“What do you mean?”

“I came here to tell you something I probably should’ve told you a long time ago.”

“What?” I could tell by the look in his eyes that he was afraid of what I had to say. That he knew what I was about to say to him.

“I...I...I need to tell you something important.”

“Jenn, tell me baby, it’s gonna be okay.”

“That’s just it Sean, it’s not. Not for us anyway.”

“What are you saying? You’re not br...breaking...” I just looked at him as the tears flooded down my cheeks I nodded my head. “But why?”

“Sean, last night I had a revelation (I couldn’t resist) I can’t be with you.”

“Why not? Was it something I said or did?”

“It was a lot of things you said and did. And it’s what happened last night.”

“What happened last night?” he asked with a tone of fear in his voice.

[Baby_Girl89]

And the dream stopped there as another one appeared.

“Alex, I can’t tell him, not yet.”

“But he deserves to know. He should’ve been the first to know. He’ll be so happy.”

“I know he will, but we just got married, I don’t think he’ll be able to handle this too.”

“Why not? Better now than later anyway, he’s getting kinda old.”

“Thanks a lot.”

“You know what I mean. Besides when are you planning on telling him anyway, when you’re in labor?”

“Well not exactly.” Then after a slight pause I said, “What if I decide not to have the baby?”

“What, please tell me you’re joking! You don’t mean an abortion do you?”

“Of course not.”

“Then adoption?”

I sat there and thought about it, I couldn’t give up my baby. I just didn’t want to ruin Nick’s life by having a baby already, but Alex was right, Nick would be happy no matter what. It was time for him to be a father anyway, “No, I can’t give up my baby, no matter what. It’s going to be a beautiful creation of the love that Nick and I shared, I couldn’t give that up. It’s my own flesh and blood. I would keep it no matter what the circumstances.”

“So then when are you going to tell Nick the good news.”

“When I’m good and fat like I look like I’m pregnant.”

“What if that never happens?”

“Then I guess I tell him when I’m in labor,” I said grinning.

She gave me this look that said, “Get real.”

“All right I guess I’ll tell as soon as I see him again.”

“When is that?”

“This weekend, knowing Nick, probably sooner. I just hope it doesn’t shatter his career.”

“I don’t think he’ll care. Besides, I’m sure Drew would love to find out that he’s going to be an uncle.”

“Yeah, I would’ve told him by now, but he’s such a blabber mouth, I’m sure he would’ve said something before I had the chance, even if he didn’t mean it.”

“I can’t believe I used to have a crush on the guy,” Alex said, thinking about sophomore year of high school.

“Lucky you, being able to use the term ‘used to’ I married mine.”

“But you two are so happy. Just as long as he doesn’t hurt you I’ll live with it.”

“You better live with it because we’re both stuck here for life.” Then looking down at my unborn child I said, “I mean the three of us are stuck here for life.”

When I got home, I found a pleasant surprise waiting for me. I opened the door and found Nick in the kitchen with a candlelight dinner prepared for me. “Nicky?”

“Hey there, Beautiful,” he said looking up at the sound of my voice.

Taking it all in, I said, “Is this, for us?”

“Of course it is silly. Who else would it be for?” he asked walking towards me. I walked towards him meeting him halfway, and then I kissed him so passionately as he returned it with just as much passion.

After we pulled apart, I said, “Baby, what are you doing home so early? I wasn’t expecting to see you until Saturday and it’s only Tuesday.”

“You bring out the spontaneity in me Beautiful. Besides I couldn’t bear to be apart from you anymore.”

“You only left on Sunday, you kook.”

“I know, but one day’s bad enough. So I’ve arranged to go only on certain days. It’s a good thing I’m only an opening act. No one’s going to miss me.”

“I’m sure that’s not true, but they certainly can’t miss you as much as I do.”

“Well I missed you more. So I’ve prepared us a nice dinner here, you ready to eat?”

“Just about, let me go freshen up first.”

I went into the bathroom looked at myself and said, “Okay Jenn, it’s now or never. You said you’d tell him the next time you saw him and here he is.” Then looking up at the ceiling I said, “Oh dear God, don’t let this be a mistake.” Then I splashed my face with some water, dried it off and went back to the kitchen where the smell of pasta was getting to me. “Oh Nicky, it smells so wonderful.”

“I confess, my mom had to help me with it a little, but I did all the cooking,” he said proudly.

“I’m so proud,” I said as I smiled at him. I found myself thinking, He looks so happy, what if this baby ruins his happiness? I just can’t do that to him. But then I thought of all the times we talked about having children and how having his own might just make him the happiest man alive. I didn’t have a choice anyway. Whether I told him or not, he was bound to notice.

So then he served the food and sat opposite of me. He always knew how to make me feel so good. “So Baby, I was wondering, what do you think about me staying home for the next two weeks?”

“I’d love it Baby,” baby, there was that word again, “but what about the tour?”

“I told them I needed two weeks alone with my beautiful wife. They understood. Besides they figured that I could just go on tour with you this summer to make up for lost time.”

“Oh, about that,” I said as my face fell, knowing full well that I’d be very pregnant by summer.

“What’s wrong Honey?” he asked concern growing in his eyes at the way I looked and sounded.

“Nothing’s wrong, exactly.”

“Then what is it Baby,” concern growing more and more in his eyes as well as in his tone.

“That’s just it.”

“What’s just it?” I could see the confusion growing too.

“Baby,” I whispered, looking down at my stomach.

“Baby? What about it?” Then as if he realized what I had just said he looked at me with a glow in his eyes that told me I had made the right choice. “Do you mean?”

I nodded, “You’re going to be a father Nicky.”

He smiled so brightly as he came to hug me. “That’s wonderful. Since when Honey?”

I looked him in the eyes, “Remember that one weekend about three weeks ago?” He nodded. “Well I think that’s when, but I just found out about two days ago.” Then I looked down at my hands.

“Two days ago, well why didn’t you tell me then Baby?”

“I was afraid,” I said looking at him and giving him a weak smile.

“Afraid? Afraid of what Honey?”

“That you wouldn’t want the baby,” I looked down again.

“Not want the baby, are you kidding me?” he asked full of surprise. Then he continued, “It’s the best news I’ve ever heard in my life. Why would you be afraid that I wouldn’t want the baby?”

Then I looked up and stared him right in the eyes and said, “Well your career was just taking off and we’ve only been married for a little more than a month, I didn’t think you needed a baby right now.”

“Baby, I’m getting pretty old, it’s now or never,” he said gently making me feel better.

Looking down again with a smirk on my face, I said, “That’s funny that’s what Alex said.”

“I knew I liked that girl for a reason. Baby you have nothing to worry about.”

“But Nicky, your job.”

“Babe, you’ve put yourself out for three seasons of the year and your album is still selling nonstop.”

“Nick, it’s only been six months.”

“And your album is still selling like hot cakes.”

“But this isn’t about me it’s about you.”

“I know, but we’ll survive. Everyone will just have to wait for summer for me.”

“Not that I don’t have confidence that a guy like you can make a comeback, but are you sure?”

He said, “I don’t care. I’ll do something else if I have to. Jenn, we’re going to have a baby,” and then he kissed me.

I brightened up and said, “Are you really happy?”

“More than anything in the world. Wait ‘til Mom hears about this. Have you seen a doctor yet?”

“No.”

“Well I guess we can do that this weekend. Friday, after your classes, I’ll set up your appointment for you.”

“Nick Honey, it’s okay you don’t have to...”

“No, I want to.” Then he kissed me again.

Then I woke up. Stupid alarm. Always interrupting the best things in life. But then again I started to think, it really could happen. My life and my luck were finally changing. But first I had to do something I didn’t want to do. When I snapped out of it I got ready to go to class, but it was really hard for me to concentrate on anything I was working on, luckily I didn’t have any tests that day, but it made me realize even more how much more I needed to tell Sean right away.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 9~


After all of my classes were done, I took a visit to Alex’s room. I was hoping that maybe she could give me some advice on how to break it to him gently, plus I wanted to tell her what had happened. Knock, knock, knock. After a five second delay, the door opened.

“Hey,” she said, opening the door to let me in, “What’s up?”

“Me, I feel like I’m floating on air.”

“You mean you finally got rid of Sean?” she asked eagerly.

“Not exactly,” I answered.

“Then what?”

“Last night was the most amazing night of my life.”

“Wait, who were you with, and what were you doing?”

“I wasn’t doing anything,” and then a smile spread across my face as I said slyly, “except a little kissing.”

“Please tell me it was Nick.”

“What is with you, I can’t believe you would advocate such a thing.”

“Then it was Sean,” she said, with a bit of a confused not so amused face.

“No, it was with Nick.”

“Does this mean, what I think it means?” she asked eagerly.

“Yep,” I answered still smiling.

“Finally, I was wondering when you were going to come to your senses.”

“Thanks a lot. Sean was a nice guy; he just wasn’t the one for me.”

“Especially when he became this seriously jealous guy. Besides you can’t tell me that you didn’t know from the beginning that Sean wasn’t the one.”

“You’re right, I could’ve done without the jealousy. But I don’t know maybe I thought that since love worked in mysterious ways something could happen. But anyway, I’ve come for a particular reason today.”

“What’s that?”

“I need you to help me figure out how to break up with Sean, without breaking him.”

“You’re asking the wrong person.”

“Come on Alex, I know you’ve got to know something.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well it’s just that you’ve come up with so many different situations you’ve got to have one for this.”

“Not really, I think you should be able to figure it out on your own. Just be careful, for his sake and yours.”

“What do you mean mine?”

“I know you. If you think you’ve severely hurt him, you’ll feel guilty about it for the rest of your life.”

“So you really have no advice?”

“My advice is to do it soon and to think about it on your way home. It should give you enough time.”

“All right,” then I got up to leave. Suddenly remembering that we still hadn’t switched the friendship books yet, I said, “Oh before I forget, here,” as I handed her mine, she handed me hers.

“Good luck,” she said as I headed out.

“Thanks, I’m probably going to need it,” I said before I left.

On my way home I listened to the Revelation CD thinking that maybe it would help me come up with something. I started to drift to the dream from the night before. I thought, I might not know how it ends, but maybe I thought about it if for a reason. If I modify a couple of things here and there I might just be able to pull it off. I think that’s what I’ll do.

So as soon as I got home, I went upstairs to my room and put my things away. Then I grabbed my purse, walked out the door, locked it, took a deep breath and headed downstairs. I was prepared to do what I had to. I wasn’t prepared to see him in the lobby. As soon as he saw me, he came toward me. It wasn’t what I expected, but then again whatever is?

“Hey, Jenn. Can we talk now?”

“It’s funny you should ask that, I was just on my way to see you.”

“All right, well we’ll go to my room then.”

This is it, I thought. I had to brave myself to make sure that I could go through with it. I knew that it was the right thing to do and that I had to do it, but it didn’t make it any easier. I had a feeling it was going to be pretty messy. When we got to his room, his roommate was there. I thought, Oh great just what I need, an excuse not to tell him. But it turned out his roommate was just about to leave. This is definitely it, I can’t back out of it now, I thought.

“So, what do you need to talk to me about?” he was being so sweet. My heart was breaking for him.

“It’s kind of important, maybe we should sit down.” So we both walked over to his bed and sat down. I couldn’t take it so I stood up again. “Sean,” I stated sounding a bit shaky.

“Yeah, Baby?” he asked with concern.

“I just want you to understand that you’re a great guy but...” I was finding it difficult to get the words out.

“Oh no, please don’t tell me that...” he suddenly had a look of fear in his eyes, much like the dream.

“Well Sean I ...” my voice started to break, tears started welling up in my eyes. It was very eerily turning into the dream.

“Baby, no please tell me it isn’t true,” he pleaded both in his eyes and in his voice.

I couldn’t bear to look at him so I turned my head as I said, “Sean, don’t make this harder than it already is.”

“But I love you.”

“I know you do, and that’s what makes this so hard already. But Sean last night I came to realize that you and me, we’re not meant to be. It would be stupid to continue this anymore. I don’t love you Sean and I don’t think I ever could. I love...” and then I stopped. How could I be so insensitive as to let those two words slip out?

“Wait, who do you love?” he sounded so desperate I didn’t know how I could just stay there, but I did.

“I can’t tell you,” I whispered quietly looking away. It was hurting so bad.

“You might as well now. Who do you love?” he asked me again with more desperation in his voice. As if having me tell him would heal it all and that he could change things.

I whispered, “Nick.”

“I knew it. How could you do this to us Jenn? I really thought we had something,” he sputtered, sounding angry. I couldn’t blame him, I did waste five and a half months of his life.

“Sean didn’t you find it odd how I never said, ‘I love you,’ to you, even before Nick showed up?” I asked hoping he would get the idea.

“I thought it would change after a while.”

“Sean I know what you wanted to believe. Trust me; I wanted to believe it too. I even thought that I did love you for a while, but it just wasn’t the way I was supposed to. So I guess I just realized that it just wasn’t going to happen. It’s not going to happen. Who knows, maybe if Nick never showed up it might be different, but you became something I didn’t want after being what I wanted for so long. I just can’t take it anymore. I’m sorry Sean but I have to break up with you.”

“Jenn, I’m so sorry. Please give me another chance.”

“Too late Sean, I’ve given you enough chances, and I’d probably have given you one more if...” I fell silent again. Could I really be cruel enough to tell him that after all his waiting I gave my first kiss to Nick? I was hurting him enough, I couldn’t do anymore, and I didn’t want to do it anymore.

But he pushed me to it. “If what Jenn, huh?”

“Never mind.”

“No I want to know what’s keeping us apart,” his voice was on edge.

“What, besides the fact that I’m in love with Nick?” I threw at him. Why didn’t he get? Wasn’t the fact that I loved someone else, good enough to keep him away from me?

“Yes, you said you would’ve given me one more chance if something, now what is it? I have a right to know.”

“Fine you want to know,” I shut my eyes and a stream of tears fell down my cheeks. I could only hope that I would never have to deal with anything like this when it came to Nick because that would be heart wrenching. I looked at him with water glazed eyes and said, “Last night Nick and I spent some time talking and he made me realize what a jerk you’ve become and in my despair, he kissed me, and I liked it. And then I kissed him back.” I could see his face go from anger to pure hurt. It was as if he couldn’t see me behaving that way.

I started to feel horrible as I realized what my words had done to him. “I’m sorry Sean, it just happened.” I saw tears start to fall from his eyes as well.

“But we can get over that. I forgive you. It wasn’t your fault you got caught up in the moment.”

“No Sean, don’t you get it? I can’t go back. Can’t you see that?”

“But you don’t love him, how can you, you’ve only known him for a month.”

“That doesn’t matter Sean. He makes me feel different, like I can be myself, love doesn’t know time.”

“But he’s like ten years older than you are.”

“You don’t think I know that?” Then as if I suddenly realized it was time Sean knew the truth I spit it out, “Sean I’ve been in love with the guy since I was fifteen I think I know how old he is. Love doesn’t know age differences either. Trust me; I’ve tried to make it see that he was ‘too’ old.”

We both finally calmed down and I sat next to him. “So, does this really mean, we’re over?” he asked with a lost little voice.

I nodded my head and said, “I’m afraid it is.”

“My worst fears have finally come true, I’ve lost you.”

I put my hand over his and made him look me in the eyes as I said, “Only as a girlfriend, but never as a friend.”

“You mean Nick wouldn’t go bezerk if he found us hanging out.”

“No, Sean he’s not you.”

“That’s where I lost you wasn’t it?” he asked giving me a weak smile.

“To tell you the truth it was probably when you couldn’t convince me that I loved you too.”

“At least I had my chance.”

“Yeah. Well I better get going then.” So he walked me to the door. I turned around and said, “Good-bye Sean.”

He said, “Bye Jenn.” Then I thought, What the heck, he’d waited so patiently might as well. I gave him a light kiss on the lips and went on my way.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 10~



When I finally got to my room I felt freer, more relaxed, and yet... The kiss I had just given Sean was bugging me. I didn’t understand it, why? Then I realized it was a little out of guilt, I was beginning to wonder if I maybe wasn’t a little Jewish. But the thing was, at least I gave it to him. I guess I just felt bad that I had made him wait this entire time only to give him the kiss when we no longer could have more and that I had given Nick his kiss before we even officially started dating. I found it would take me a long time to get over it.

At about three thirty, an hour after I broke up with Sean my phone rang. I picked it up to find that I was about to begin the rest of my life.

“Hello,” I answered.

“Hello, there Beautiful. I can say that without feeling guilty now, right?”

“Yes, I just broke up with him today. I’m all yours now, that is, if you still want me.”

“Are you kidding me? I’ve been waiting my whole life for this moment to arrive. Does this mean I can come see you whenever I want without you feeling bad about it?”

“Yes, in fact I think I’d feel wonderful about it.”

“Shall I test it?”

“It’s all up to you, but I certainly wouldn’t mind.”

“Okay, then I’ll see you in a bit. I love you.”

“I love you too.” I said it. The three words I’d been waiting my life to say over the phone to the love of my life. It felt so natural.

“It makes me feel so good to know you feel the same way that I do.”

“It makes me feel good too. More than you’ll ever know. Bye.”

“See you in a bit. Bye.”

I really was on top of the world. I finally had the man I wanted and he really was everything I imagined him to be. Could life get any better? I just couldn’t believe my luck. My whole life I’d been waiting for a guy to connect with and I finally had found him. I didn’t think that it would ever be possible. But I found that as great as my life was finally becoming it didn’t mean it wouldn’t still be full of complications.

There was a sudden knock on the door. My heart filled with joy as I thought of who was supposed to be behind it, but when I opened it my heart sank.

“Hi Sean.”

“Hi, I need to talk to you Jenn.” He sounded so sad. As much as I wanted to send him away I couldn’t.

“Okay come in.” He walked through my door and did the usual, walked straight to my bed.

“Jenn, I’m miserable without you, isn’t there anything I can do to change your mind?”

“Sean, I already told you no. Besides isn’t this a little quick to tell me that you’re miserable without me when it’s only been about an hour.”

“I know, but I’ve been so miserable this past hour knowing that you’re not mine, anymore. I don’t know how I’ll survive without you.”

I took his hands in mine, “Sean, you’ll be fine. Go on without me for a week, you’ll find someone new. You don’t need me, you only think you do.”

“Jenn, I won’t be able to find someone to replace you. You made me feel so much more different than all the other girls I’ve ever dated. You made me want to be a better me. I don’t want to lose that.”

“Sean that wasn’t ...” knock, knock. “Hold on.” My heart started to soar again, although I felt a little bad that I was feeling such joy when the heart that I had just broken was sitting on my bed. I opened the door and Nick was once again holding flowers for me. I walked out of my door and shut it behind me. Then I hugged him with all my might.

When we released he asked me, “What’s wrong? Can’t we go in your room?”

“There’s something I need to tell you first Nick.”

“Please tell me, you’re not still with Sean,” pain was starting to seep into his eyes.

“No, no, that’s not it, but Sean is in my room.”

Then he just looked puzzled, “What’s he doing in there? You’re not breaking up with him now are you?”

“No, he’s trying to plead his case into having me take him back.”

Fear rolled into his eyes, “Are you?”

I looked him in the eyes to prove to him, he was the only one and lovingly said, “Nick, I can’t take him back. I don’t love him. I love you, ya nut. You’re the only one for me,” I finished giving him one of my patented goofy grins.

Then he gave a big sigh of relief and said, “Whew, for a minute I thought...”

“Nick, how could you even think that after all we’ve been through, after how hard you pushed for me to say how I really felt about you and him that I would go back? Can’t you tell by now that it’s you and only you?”

“I can now. But what are we going to do about him?”

“I don’t know Nicky, but I assume the only thing we can do is bring you in. Maybe then he’ll get the picture. I feel really awful being so happy with him so sad in there.”

“Who wouldn’t be sad after losing you? I know I would be.” So, before we went into my room I had to get my kiss.

When we walked in, we found Sean sitting on my bed with a very sad look on his face, but like he was contemplating something. I interrupted his thoughts with an “Ahem.” He looked up and saw Nick and me standing in front of the doorway hand-in-hand.

“Oh, sorry,” then as if he finally realized it was a hopeless cause he said, “Well, I tried. Good-bye Jenn, I love you and I’ll miss you.”

“You can always come to talk to me.”

He gave me a weak smile and said, “Thanks,” and he walked out of the door.

“Girl, you really shattered him,” Nick said, giving me a look of mock shock.

“Well it’s all your fault, Lachey,” I said as I smiled at him.

“Are you going to blame this one on me?”

“Yes I am. If I hadn’t fallen in love with you and if you hadn’t shown up, I’d still be with him.”

“Then, maybe it’s a good thing I showed up. Blame it on me all you want, I finally found my happiness and she’s mine.”

“I’m not property,” I said as I took his hand and led him to my bed.

“I know, that was Sean’s biggest mistake.”

I started to feel guilty again so I said, “Let’s not talk about Sean, okay?”

“You don’t gotta twist my arm,” he said smiling down upon me. I don’t know how he does it but he always knows how to make me feel better. “So, what now?”

“I don’t know.”

“Okay, well I guess we can really start this relationship off by going out on an official date.”

“Mm. Sounds good to me,” I said as I snuggled up against him. I knew at that moment that I was right where I belonged.

“So when should we go?”

I looked at him and said, “Hey, I still live in the 16th century, it’s your job to figure out what we do,” as I said it I broadened into another smile.

“Better be careful with that smile of yours milady, it’s bright enough as it is in here.”

I reached up to give him a kiss, then I said, “How did I ever get so lucky?”

“I’m the lucky one,” he said returning my kiss.

I was in pure heaven, for a while I thought that I had actually died and gone there, again. It wouldn’t have mattered to me either way as long as I was with Nick. Who knew that one day all my dreams would come true? It’s true that it didn’t exactly happen the way I thought that it would, but when does reality ever follow to the letter a dream. Well maybe for a psychic.

“So, what are we going to do?” I asked. I was very eager to begin my relationship with him, although I was pretty sure it already started.

“Well I’d love to have it tonight, but I want to do it right. So how about we have our official date this Saturday?”

“Sounds great, but what do we do in the meantime?”

“Just hang out.”

“You do realize that was the last kiss we’re going to share until that date comes into play.”

“Really?” he said as he gave me his puppy dog eyes.

“Well maybe one more before we completely have to go cold turkey for the next few days.”

Then he gave a Monty Burns look put his fingers together and said, “Excellent.” It was so cute. Then he pulled me close and said, “Brace yourself, I’m coming in,” and he kissed me. It was even fierier than any of the other kisses we’d shared. It seemed as if neither of us wanted to let go. We ended up kissing for a good five minutes to come up for air only to dive back in again. When we finally pulled apart we just stared into each other’s eyes. Neither of us knew what to say. I can personally say that I really wish I hadn’t made that decree, but I also knew that after a week, not even a week, the kiss would be even better.

Nick broke the silence by saying, “I really don’t want to wait.”

I said, “If you could wait before you can certainly wait now.”

“I don’t think so,” he replied giving me a devilish grin.

As I pulled myself away only to turn around and have him hold me, I said, “Oh Nick, you’re so silly.”

“Maybe, but I love you.”

I just held him tighter as I said, “I love you too. It feels so freeing to be able to say it to someone I really love and have him love me back.”

“It feels really freeing to know you love me back. I was actually beginning to feel like it was useless. But I could always see it in your eyes when you looked at me. I knew, Jenn, I always knew. I just needed you to admit it out loud.”

“Baby, you don’t know how many times I’ve said it out loud.”

“Well then for someone to hear it, namely me.”

“Nicky, you’ll never have to worry about it again. You are my hero, my Nick to the rescue.”

He looked down at me and I looked up at him and we just smiled at each other. I could see that lost twinkle in his eyes. I could tell he was happy. It was the missing piece of the puzzle. I couldn’t believe that I was the one. I always knew it was him, and I’m glad I was right. Then I snuggled into him even more feeling the warmth of his body against mine. Boy did it feel good.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 11~


“You Don't Know,” he said out of nowhere breaking the silence again.

“I don’t know what baby?” I asked confused.

“I wrote that thinking about you.”

“But you didn't even know me yet.”

“Yes, I did. To tell you the truth, I had a dream about you telling me these things and then I added some of what I felt and then there was the song.”

“You're kidding me.”

“Nope, I sound like a nut don’t I?" he asked putting his chin on my shoulder.

I turned my head to look at him as I said, "Well not exactly, believe it or not I thought you stole that song from me, at least some of the emotions behind it.”

“I wrote a lot of songs thinking about you. You were the image I always came up with when I thought of some of my songs,” then he gave me a kiss on my cheek.

“Hey.”

“What, you didn’t say I couldn’t kiss your cheeks.”

“Oh you, anyway, you were my inspiration, too. My first songs were written because of you and then many others after that were also about you.”

“You write songs?”

“I shouldn’t have said that.”

“No I’m glad you did. Could you show me some of your work?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” I said pulling away and looking at him.

“Please,” he said as he gave me those sad puppy dog eyes.

“Don’t do that.”

“What?” he asked as it got cuter and cuter.

“Oh, all right. Let me ask you a question first,” I said as I picked up my notebook and sat down.

He brightened up, “What?”

“Do you want a good one or a bad one?”

“A good one, of course.”

“Oh well then you’re out of luck, because all I have are bad ones.”

“Give me a break.”

“Sorry, you answered wrong.” I think he must have noticed the notebook in my hand, because he lunged for it and we toppled onto the floor.

He looked like he was about to kiss me again when I rolled my head and said, “You know the rules.”

“I know ‘em but that doesn’t mean I like them,” he said dejectedly.

“It’s only for a couple more days.”

“It’s so hard when I see you all the time.”

“Then don’t.”

“You mean you want me to leave?”

“It’s not that I want you to, but maybe then it’ll keep your mind off of kissing.”

“Are you kidding me, it’s just going to make it worse.”

“Then pretend we’re not together and that Saturday is going to be our first time together. You’re an actor you can do it.”

“I haven’t acted in quite a while, that’s why I became a singer.”

“Get over it,” I said giggling and pushing him off.

Then he just changed the subject on me, “Okay, now let me see your work.”

“You’re pushy, you know that?”

“Would you be here if I weren’t?”

“Of course, it’s my room.”

“You know what I mean.”

“I guess it would have to depend then wouldn’t it?”

He looked like he was pondering the question for a moment, but instead of saying anything about it he said, “So, let me see ‘em.”

“All right, hold on. Let me ask you another question.”

“No more questions, you’re too tricky for me you sphinx.” Then he reached over and we played tug-of-war until he finally managed to get it out of my hands. The notebook ended up with the back side up, which happened to have a picture of him on it. “What’s this?” he said smiling at me.

“Nothing, it’s just a picture of you,” I stated as if it were nothing.

“I know it is, but…” he said, a little more shocked now.

“But what’s it doing on my notebook?” He nodded, with a pleased smile on his face, “I told you, you inspired me.”

Then he proceeded to open up the notebook. I didn’t bother trying to stop him knowing that it would’ve been useless. I didn’t feel like being tickled right then. (I know that’s what he would’ve done.) He saw the thickness of it and the number of titles and said in awe, “You wrote all of this?”

“Don’t look so shocked.”

“No I’m just awe-inspired.”

“It’s not all about you either, just in case your head started to get inflated. You were just the one to inspire most and get me started like I said before.”

“You don’t mind if I read some do you?”

“I really wish you wouldn’t,” I said uncertainly.

It was still on the title page and he spotted one, “Is this one about me?”

“No, it’s about some other Nicholas that caused me a heart attack about every three seconds,” I said sarcastically.

“Can I at least read this one?”

“I...I...” I really didn’t want him to, not that I thought that he would hate them exactly, but I was so scared of what he might have thought that I was just unsure.

“Come on, it has my name for its title. You can’t deny me a reading about myself.”

“Why not? I find it fun,” I said giving him a coy smile.

“Please,” he started to give me the look again.

“Oh no you don’t, it’s not going to work this time Nicholas.” I just couldn’t help it; he knew how to get to my weak spot. “Oh...” I held my ground as he started to smile, “NO.”

“Dang it,” he said snapping his fingers. Then he asked, “Well can I read anything else?”

“I don’t know.”

“Oh come on, you’ve read, heard my stuff.”

“How can I help it when you give it to the world to hear?”

“Well so what, why write without showing others your work then?”

“For my own sake. It was a good way for me to express my feelings without having to bug anybody else about them.”

“Why keep them?”

“For my own records. This isn’t helping your case by the way.”

“Can’t I see just one?”

“Maybe later.”

Two seconds later, “How about now?”

“Later like another day. We haven’t been together for very long and I’m just not ready to be so public with my stuff. I’ve known Alex for about seven years now. Do you know how long it took for me to show her my stuff? A lot longer than you’re asking for buddy. And she still hasn’t seen everything.”

“All right, I’ll wait. But I can’t guarantee patience.”

“You can try can’t you?”

“I guess, but look at this stack. I mean if you only had one, I might be able to be a little bit more patient but jeez girl,” he said eyeing my work.

Then I had an idea. I didn’t want to show him anything really, but there was one song that had a lot of publicity already so I figured why not? Besides I thought that maybe it might have been a way to get him off my back. I thought, Well, if he finds he doesn’t like my style then maybe he’ll leave me alone about the rest of them. So then I said, “I’ve changed my mind, you can read one of them.”

“Ooh, the one about me?” he asked me hopefully.

“You are so egotistical; no I’m going to choose.” Then I found it on the list, pointed to it, and said, “’The Perfect Night’.”

“Sounds intriguing.”

“Just read it.” As he read it, I looked at him anxiously, looking and hoping for praise. I’m not quite sure what I really wanted, but I was looking for something distinctive at least. When he finished he looked at me with tears in his eyes. So I said, “Well, what do you think?”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Jenn, that was amazing. Your chorus, I ... how did you find the words for this song?”

I just looked at him took his hand in mine and said, “Nick, do you really have to ask?”

“Us, but this hasn’t happened for us yet, nothing acknowledgeable anyway. And from what I can tell this was written a while ago.”

“Yeah, I wrote it when I was sixteen in fact.” I wiped away his tears. I was so shocked and happy that he liked it. I never moved anyone to tears with that song before. It made me wonder how he’d react to some of the sadder ones. That was actually a happy love ballad.

“So, how?”

“Dreams, my love, what else could I get them from? I never experienced this in reality, but my dreams always kept you alive and well in my heart and they inspired me to write songs like this.”

“Do you have a melody?”

“Kind of. I’ve actually performed it a couple of times.”

“Could you perform it for me now?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

He smiled as he said, “It was worth a shot.”

“I guess. I still don’t know you well enough to sing for you. I’m not exactly the most confident person in the world.”

“Well can I read some of your other ones now? You’ve made me so curious.”

“Of course, the exact opposite of what I was trying to achieve.”

“Your words move me in a way I’d never known,” then he began to recite the chorus,

“’This is the moment I’ve waited for
It’s everything I’ve dreamed of
Even more
I couldn’t have imagined a more
Perfect night
I wish this night would never end.’”

Then he said, “I can only hope that I can live up to this.” Then he sat in silence thinking again, staring at the words. After a few seconds he said, “Does the rest of this song say what you really think of me?”

Suddenly I became quiet as well. The chorus may not have said much but the verses said everything or at least enough. It seemed to have slipped my mind of what some of the words were to the song before I showed it to him. Most of my “love” songs seemed to convey what I didn’t want him to know quite yet, that I was madly in love with him for all this time. “The Perfect Night” was just another example of one that should have waited. I thought I would have been okay, but then I got myself stuck. I had no choice but to tell him the truth. “Yes,” I whispered.

“You’ve felt our love through your dreams, this much?”

“Yes,” I whispered again as I looked him in the eyes.

“Then you know I’m not that crazy,” he said sounding completely relieved at the thought of knowing that I knew how he felt.

“Nick, honey, you created me out of thin air, at least I had something to work with.”

“But you still felt that connection, didn’t you?”

“Of course, I did. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have tried so hard to push you from my mind.”

“What?” he asked shocked.

“I shouldn’t have said that.”

“I knew it seemed strange when you kept telling me to go away.”

“What do you mean you...Does this mean that you...?”

“Yeah, I did. I saw it very vividly. You kept telling me to go away, and I didn’t understand how my dream could be telling me that. And I imagined you telling me to leave you alone and that I was with Jessica so I should be with her and...”

A look of shock streaked my face, “Oh my gosh. No, it couldn’t be.”

“What, what couldn’t be?” he asked concerned at the shock in my voice.

“I made those dreams up. You mean you saw them too?” I asked looking and feeling overwhelmingly confused.

“I must have.”

“What about the dream where we’re standing underneath a full moon and you’re holding me in your arms. I’m wearing a black dress and you’re wearing a tux. We’re both facing the moon and we’re so happy that it feels...”

“…like nothing can tear us apart. Then I turn you around and we kiss. We’re like on a cliff or somewhere secluded. I’ve also seen us underneath a gazebo. But that was years ago. Wait, does this mean...?”

“I don’t know what it means Nick. Are we really meant to be?”

“We must be. Can’t you see it my love? God gave us both the same dreams to show us that we belong together. I remember a lot of times I would start to say your name and something would block it, except there were times when I’d call you Isabel and I could hear it, but it doesn’t make any sense, now.”

“It might once I tell you this. I’ve actually always wanted to be a professional singer and my stage name was going to be Isabel.”

“It’s got to be it. We’re supposed to be together Jenn. There are no two people in this world that belong together more than you and me.”

“Do you really believe that?”

“As much as I have love for you in my heart, and that’s saying a lot. I just don’t understand why it took me so long to find you.”

“Maybe it’s because I was younger than eighteen then.”

“I wouldn’t have cared.”

“I didn’t think you would, but I was considered jail bait up until now.”

“You’re right, I didn’t even think about that. We could’ve kept it a secret.”

“That actually would’ve been a lot of fun,” I said smiling and giving a little giggle.

He put his hand under my chin pulled my face up to look at him and he said, “We still can you know?”

“Are you ashamed of me?” I suddenly asked him without even thinking.

He started to laugh a little as he said, “Far from it,” then he continued saying with a little bit of a sad look on his face, “I just thought that you might be ashamed of me.”

Then I had to smile, “Are you kidding me? I love you more than words could ever express, no matter how much I write. But it would be kind of fun for a while. People can start spreading rumors and you won’t look quite so bad if you still wait a little to tell people that you’re with someone new, although I know how I’d feel if I were someone else finding this out. Maybe we can keep you and me a secret but not you being taken.”

“I like the way you think,” he said giving me a grin that made me weak in the knees.

“Thank you.” Then I looked at my watch and said, “Holy cow, Nicky it’s already midnight. I think you better leave honey.”

“Wow, I didn’t realize it was getting so late. It’s just great being with you without having to worry about other things.”

“It’s been great being with you too babe, but I’ve still got some things to take care of and I need to get some sleep.”

“Okay, I’ll go now,” we both got up and I walked him to the door, “See you later?”

“Maybe not today, honey. I haven’t quite learned to completely control myself around you. But I definitely can’t wait until Saturday.”

“You mean I have to wait until Saturday to see you again?” he asked sounding so shocked.

“I’m afraid so, you’re too distracting. It was bad enough when you weren’t here.”

“Can I still call you?”

“Of course, I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

“Well, since we won’t have to worry about temptation, can I have one more kiss for the road?”

I thought about it for all of two seconds then I pulled him down for one heck of a kiss. I ended up pulling him back into my room and shutting the door as we just stood there and kissed. When we finally finished we broke apart and I said, “How was that?”

“Great, can I have another one?”

“Why Nicholas, I think you’re addicted to kissing.”

“Only when it comes to you.”

“Well, you’re just going to have to wait now.”

“Ooh, that’s so not nice.”

“Too bad.” I opened the door and let him out. “Bye, Nicky.”

“Bye babe. I love you.”

I felt very warm and tingly inside, “I love you too.” Then he turned around with a smile on his face and was on his way.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 12~


I spent the next day so tired. I just couldn’t seem to concentrate or stay awake. I was seriously thinking of skipping out on some of my classes, but I just couldn’t do it. The goody-two-shoes in me just wouldn’t hear of it. When I finally finished my classes, I took a little visit with Alex, apologized for leaving so early, and went home.

When I got home, I found that there were thirteen messages on my machine. I thought to myself, Those better not all be from Nick, though I smiled to myself secretly hoping they were. So then I played them. I was wrong; they weren’t all from Nick, only the first twelve. I think he was seriously bored. But I had to laugh as I listened to them. He was so sweet. He kept talking about how he couldn’t wait to see me again and he ended every message with “I love you.” It was making me wonder if he was just trying to convince himself of it or if he was just being him.

Then I got to the last message and my cheeriness fell face forward. It was a message from Sean, “Jenn, please hear me out,” I heard him plead. “I need you. Please take me back. I’ll change. You’re the only one I need, the only one I want,” my mind added “hoo-hoo-hoo, honey” I couldn’t help it. “Jenn, you don’t need him. I can do so much more for you. He’s not going to be around as much as me. Please Jenn you have to take me back. I love you.” My heart sank again.

Why couldn’t it have been easier than that? I just knew something like that was going to happen. That’s why I wanted him to break up with me, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. How was I supposed to make Sean get over me? I mean I kissed another guy, many times (not that he knew that), but he still wanted me back. What in the world was I supposed to do? I didn’t want to do anything too drastic, it might’ve caused him more pain than needed, but it looked like it might have been the only option.

Then I had an idea. What if I found Sean a new girl? I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to accomplish it, but who wouldn’t want to go out with Sean, with his reform? Besides he was a good-looking guy, sweet, and sensitive. I just needed to find someone who would be willing to go out with him. I knew it wouldn’t be too hard. There were plenty of girls who were ogling him while we were dating; all I had to do was find one.

Then my phone rang again. I was hoping it was Nick, “Hello?”

“Oh good you’re home.”

And of course, I was wrong, “Hi, Sean.”

“I need to see you.”

“I really can’t right now.”

“Why what’s wrong? Is Nick there with you?”

“Nothing’s wrong. And it’s none of your business whether Nick is here or not anymore, Sean. We’re not together anymore, remember?”

“Sorry, but I need to see you.”

“Today?”

“As soon as possible.”

“Can you give me about an hour first?”

“Sure. See you in the lobby?”

“Okay.”

So I took that hour to take a little nap first. I was going to call Nick but I knew that any conversation I had with him would take a lot longer than an hour. So after I woke up from my nap I felt more refreshed and a little more relaxed. Then I remembered what I had stupidly agreed to and I became confused. I was pretty sure I knew what the meeting was going to be about and yet I agreed to it anyway, why? I figured it was just because I liked being walked on, or was it that face to face confrontation was always more fun?

I gathered my stuff together and headed downstairs. I figured since we were having our meeting in the lobby it wouldn’t be as bad as it could have been. When I got down there, I discovered him sitting on one of couches waiting for me. When I reached him and was about to sit, he stood up and said, “Ready to go?”

“Ready to go, but I thought we were going to talk here?”

“No I just said we were going to meet here.”

“Sean I don’t want to go anywhere.”

“Please, it’s important.”

“All right fine.” Why was I such the stupid one? I followed him as he led me on foot to a secluded area. When we arrived, I found another picnic lain out before my eyes. I thought, Oh no, what’s he got up his sleeve now? Out loud I said, “What’s this?”

“A picnic,” he said smiling at me.

“What kind of gimmick is this?” I asked him.

“No gimmick I just thought…”

I cut him off, “What, Sean, that you could get me back with another one of these? It’s not going to work. In fact, it’s really not going to do you any good at all. Don’t you remember what happened after the picnic?”

He thought for a few seconds, his face fell and he said, “Yeah, I do.” Then he quickly added, “But we can forget about that.”

“No Sean, I can’t. In fact, I think that really made my final decision for me. I’m going to tell you something that you don’t want to hear, but I’m going to tell you anyway. Ever since Nick came into my life I was fighting with myself over being with him. I wanted it to work out with you so much that I didn’t seem to care that it was hurting Nick, not to mention myself. But now that he and I are together, I’ve realized what a fool I’ve been to be hiding how I felt this whole time. I’m sorry Sean, but we’ll never be together again.”

“But we belong together,” he implored.

“I know that somewhere you actually believe that, but Sean, look real hard, you’ll see that we’re not,” I needed him to understand that so much.

“But what if you two break up? Will we have a chance then?” he asked hopefully.

“Sean I already told you, no more chances.”

“But that’s because you’re dating him.”

“Not officially,” he started to get a goofy smile on his face like he had a chance before anything really happened, so I added, “yet.”

“You have to give me another chance,” he pleaded.

“Sean, I said we could be friends. That’s it. No more. I can’t take your jealousies.”

“I was only jealous of him because I thought I was going to lose you. It turns out I was right.”

“Maybe, but if you weren’t so jealous maybe it wouldn’t have turned out this way. Maybe we wouldn’t be having this conversation, now we’ll never know. Goodbye Sean I’m going to my room now, I’ve got work to do.”

“And let me guess, spend time with Nick?”

“No, I’m not actually, not that it’s any of your business.” I started to walk away.

“What about that kiss?” he pleaded after me.

I walked back to him and asked, “What about the kiss, Sean?”

“Couldn’t you feel the spark? Didn’t it make you want to stay? Jenn I felt the spark. And I want to feel it for the rest of my life,” his eyes started to get teary.

I said calmly and patiently, “Sean I’m sorry, I didn’t feel the spark. In fact I think it just confirmed that we’re not meant to be. It didn’t mean anything to me. I’m sorry to hurt you like this, but it’s the truth.”

“But why did you give it to me if, you didn’t think that we still had a chance?”

“Honestly, and I’m sorry to be so blunt, it was a pity kiss. I felt sorry that you never got your kiss, so I gave it to you.”

“No it can’t be. But...” he couldn’t seem to finish his sentence, instead he said, “And what about Nick?”

“I don’t think you wanna know.”

“If I didn’t want to know I wouldn’t have asked,” he stated.

“All right fine, when I kissed him that night, I felt like I was floating and that nothing could go wrong. He made me feel so alive. Sean, he’s the one, and I have to go now,” I said right before leaving, I couldn’t stand to look at him anymore.

And then, “You know I don’t understand you,” he shouted after me.

I stopped and turned around, “What?”

[Baby_Girl89]

“I don’t understand why you only spend time with guys you’re not with. When you were with me, you spent all of your time with him and now that you two are together, you’re spending your time with me.”

I started to walk toward him and when I reached him I slapped him, after all my time of trying not to hurt him I couldn’t take it anymore. “Sean, how dare you say that to me? In case you don’t remember the only reason I’m here is because you asked me to come. And as I friend I felt obliged to do so. You sounded like you were in need, so I came. Thanks,” I spewed out angrily.

“For what?” he asked looking at me confused.

“For making me realize that I did make the right choice after all. If you ever want to talk to me again, call me when you stop acting like a jerk. Goodbye.” I turned around in a huff and walked away as fast as I could. He didn’t even try to come after me. Maybe he finally got the picture, or not, as I was to later find.

When I got back to my room I was in a really foul mood. Then I looked at my answering machine to find that I had another five messages waiting for me. I played them; they were all from Nick, of course. They cheered me up a little. It was nice to know he hadn’t forgotten about me and as the messages were winding down to the last one my phone rang again. I picked up just hoping beyond hope that it was him again. I needed to have a conversation with him and just listen to his beautiful voice one more time.

“Hello?” I asked hopefully.

“Hi, beautiful,” he replied cheerfully.

I breathed a sigh of relief. It was Nick to the rescue again. “Hey, Nicky. I’m so glad you called again.”

“Oh, you must mean the messages. I called more times than I left messages.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“Nope, couldn’t help it. I knew you probably weren’t home anyway, but I just had to listen to your beautiful voice, even if it was on a machine.”

“Oh, you’re so sweet.”

“Sweet on you.”

“I wish you were here right now,” I said forlornly.

“I could be. Is something wrong?” he asked, in a voice of concern.

“No, I just need you.”

“All right that’s it I’m coming over,” I could just hear him smiling through the phone.

“No, you can’t,” I protested.

“But you just said you needed me.”

“But I don’t want you going out of your way to come see me.”

“What out of my way? Give me an excuse to park my car.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’ve been circling the campus,” he said sort of quietly.

“You haven’t.”

“Yeah, I have.”

“Nicky, don’t you know how much pollution that must be causing?”

“I haven’t really been doing it all day, only every once in a while. I had to leave before people started getting suspicious.”

I chuckled while saying, “Wait, leave where?” although I had a pretty good idea.

“You’re parking lot.” Then I started to laugh. “What’s so funny?”

I stopped long enough to say, “You.”

“What makes me so funny?” he asked intrigued.

“The fact that you can’t even bear to be away for a day. Honey, how are you going to last until Saturday?”

“I don’t think I will.”

“Baby, find something to keep yourself busy. The time will go by faster that way.”

“But everything I do leads me back to thinking about you.”

“Go watch a movie.”

“Can’t,” he simply stated.

“Why not?”

“I keep thinking about all the movies we’ve watched together and the things that can happen at a movie theater.”

“Nicky, you’re hopeless.”

“Hopelessly in love with the best woman on the planet.”

“What am I going to do with you?”

“Marry me one day, hopefully,” he said all too seriously.

He really caught me off guard with that comment, but I just let it roll and smoothly continued pretending that his comment didn’t get to me, “Jumping a little too far ahead, aren’t we?”

“Scared of marriage?” he asked coyly.

“No I’m scared of you, ya big lug,” I said while trying to hold my laughter.

“I know how to change your mind.”

“Oh really and how do you plan on doing that?” I said playfully. I just wished that I could’ve seen his face while he was talking to me. I knew that it definitely would’ve been joyful to watch.

“You’ll just have to wait for Saturday.”

“Oh, you’re a sly one you are.” Then after a slight pause I asked him, “Where are you, anyway?”

“Your parking lot. I’m doing all I can to stay down here.”

“Babe I don’t think that’s wise, considering the temptations involved.”

“I know but I can’t help it.”

“What am I going to do with you?”

“I already answered that one.”

“Go back to your hotel room and just write about how much you love me,” I said jokingly. I didn’t think he’d actually take my idea.

“Sounds like a good idea. If I can’t get you off of my mind, write.”

“Honey, I was just kidding.”

“Doesn’t matter, gotta keep myself busy remember?”

“You’re such a nut.”

“Nuts about you.”

“Will you stop that?”

“Stop what?”

“Taking everything I say about you and make it sound like a good thing.”

“Can’t help it, I’m too in love not to.”

“Well I’m gonna let you go now.”

“Homework?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, well I love you.”

“I love you too, Nicky, bye.”

“Bye.”

“Sorry I’m getting the last word bye,” and before I let him answer I hung up the phone. And just as I was expecting the phone rang two seconds later.

I picked it up and he said, “Nope I am, I love you, bye.” Then he hung up. I wasn’t about to fight him on it, I had too much to do. But talking to him, really brightened up what was potentially going to be a horrible day. It just made me wonder if maybe Nick was going to do that to me all the time. Could he really brighten up any horrible day I had? Only time could tell.

After I got off the phone, I started working on some of my homework. I realized that the next couple of days would be the longest days of my life. But I always did have the next day to look forward to because I knew that Nick would call every day. He was that dedicated. I did sit and wonder if Nick would really write anything and if he did what it would be about. My curiosity did get to me for a while, but I knew that if I waited patiently I would find out. Besides I had other things I needed to concentrate on.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 13~



I went to sleep that night with no one but Nick on my mind. But my thoughts started to go crazy. Now my dreams were beginning to invent new problems for Nick and me to go through. At first the dreams were peaceful it was a picture of the two of us, happy with whatever it was that we were doing. Then, something really strange and somewhat realistic happened to appear:

Nick and I were happily together for a few months. People knew that he had someone new, but they never really got to find out whom, because Nick was being secretive about it. I hadn’t really told anybody either, just a few of my closest friends and family. Well they didn’t know that it was the Nick just a Nick. By then Nick had told his family, he didn’t have a choice, he had to explain to his family why he left Jessica.

Within these first few months, Nick finally got to hear me sing and he thought I was amazing. He wanted to help me get started. I was a little hesitant about it at first, but he just supported me in whatever decisions I made and I finally agreed to it. He took me under his wing and made himself my manager so that I wouldn’t have to worry about what a real manager might do to me. He took me to the recording studio whenever he got the chance and we started to record some of my own songs. I was so ecstatic. We even sang a couple of duets together. Nick’s second CD was going to come out before mine so we, meaning he, decided that we should put one or two of our duets on it, that way we could get a reaction, before I did anything too big.

Then he also decided that his next single would be our next single. We were going to release a song together. We both wanted the song to really mean something so we wrote it together. The producers and everyone working on both of our CDs loved the song. When we sang it, everyone just watched in awe as the chemistry between us became so apparent it was spooky. People kept telling Nick to watch out or his new girlfriend might get jealous. Nick and I had to laugh, in private, about that.

Anyway, our single was released and it went to the top so fast I thought my head was going to spin. We were brought on TRL and I started living a life I’d only dreamt about. On that first day on TRL, my life was about to change when people were about to find out that I was the one Nick was dating.

“Welcome to TRL, I’m your host Carson Daly and here with me today are Nick Lachey and Isabel.” Then he turned to me and asked, “So is it just Isabel or do you have a last name?”

“No it’s just Isabel.”

“Cool, very cool. So tell me how does it feel to have a number one song?”

“Great,” I still couldn’t believe it.

“So Nick, how did this project come along? How did you two end up doing a song together? Did you like pick her off the street and say, hey I want to sing with you?”

“Uh, not exactly Carson,” Nick replied a little shakily, I could tell he wanted to say something so bad, “I’ve known her for a little while now and when I first heard her sing I knew the world had to hear her too. So I got her started. We’re still in the process of finishing up her debut CD right now.”

“So she has her own CD? Wow, when’s it coming out, because I know I want it.”

I started to blush a little. “I’ll make sure to give you a signed copy Mr. Daly,” I said.

“Please call me Carson, I’m not my dad.”

“Right,” I answered feeling a little bit sheepish. It was very apparent that I hadn’t done that before.

“So this single, tell us a little about it before we premiere it.”

“Well Izzy and I wrote the song together and…”

“Wait a minute, you two wrote this? She writes too?” Carson asked in awe.

“Actually she wrote the majority of her album.”

“Wow, is there anything you can’t do?” Carson asked.

“I can’t dance.” The whole studio erupted into laughter.

Then Carson said, “So tell us, how did you guys write such an awesome song? Did you guys pull from personal experiences and then write it together or what?”

“Well, do you think we could answer that after the video?” Nick asked. I could tell he really wanted to say something then.

“Oh sure, role the video, and here’s Nick and Isabel with…” I couldn’t hear the name of the song or get to see the video. I guess some things are better left unknown. When the video was finished we started talking about it.

“Wow, you guys had a lot of chemistry going on there. I hope your boyfriend and girlfriend aren’t jealous of how close you two work together.”

Nick started to scratch his head as he was about to tell the MTV world about our relationship. “Well Carson, we don’t really have to worry about that.”

“Have secure partners huh?”

“You could say that.” After a slight pause, “I think there’s something that we should tell you guys.” He looked at me for approval and I just nodded my head. He took my hand in his and said, “My mystery girl is right here. Isabel and I are together. She’s been the one.” Then he kissed my hand for an added affect.

“That’s right,” I added looking at him and then turning back to Carson, “I didn’t want Nick to say anything because I didn’t want my relationship with Nick to have to do with ‘rising to the top’,” I said putting my fingers in quote motion. “But we figured I’ve been doing okay on my own now and that the video would probably have some questions arise, so here’s the truth.”

“Well, I think you just shot down quite a lot of guys out there,” Carson commented.

“They already knew I had a boyfriend,” then looking at Nick again I said, “just not who.”

“Probably thought they had a chance before.”

“It wouldn’t have been likely, even if my boyfriend weren’t Nick, I’d be pretty committed to my guy.”

Nick said, “You can say that again.” I nudged him for it, knowing what he meant.

Then Carson looked into the camera and said, “Well you guys heard it here first. It’s official these two are an item. And what a cute couple these two make.”


* * * * *


Meanwhile I could see Jessica tuning into this edition of TRL knowing that Nick was going to be on it. When she heard the news she exploded, “I can’t believe he’s dating her. Why did he leave me for her? What does she have that I don’t? She might be a little taller but that’s about all she has on me. I swear Nick I will make you mine again.”

Then the dream jumped to Jessica putting her plan in motion a few weeks later. She found out some background information to try and use it against me. She even got Sean involved. He was going to be one of her pawns in her evil scheme to get Nick back. She discovered that I had a boyfriend before Nick, Sean. She contacted him and found that he still loved me. She asked for his help and told him that he could get me back.

“Who are you?” he asked when she first called him.

“I’m going to be very useful to you in getting back the girl of your dreams,” she replied.

“That’s impossible. She’s in love with another guy. I’m never going to get her back. Besides, what’s in it for you?” he asked suspiciously.

“I just want to get back what’s mine from your ex-girlfriend. She stole him from me and I intend to get him back.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Nick, her boyfriend, is my ex-fiancé.”

“You mean you two were engaged and he left you and stole my girl from me?”

“Yes,” she simply answered.

“And you still want him back?” he asked a little confused.

“Well yes I love him. That witch put a spell on him I just know it.”

“Hey, Jenn is anything but a witch.”

“Did you just call her Jenn?” she asked curiously.

“Yeah, got a problem with that?”

“No of course not, it’s just…never mind.”

“So what do you want?” he asked getting annoyed.

“To give you what you want while getting what I want.”

“What’s it got to do with me?”

“Everything. So will you be willing to be my ally?”

“Only if you stop insulting the love of my life.”

“Honestly what do you guys see in her?” she said erupting.

“Her undying beauty.”

Scowling she replied, “Whatever.”

[Baby_Girl89]

I woke up from the dream a little bit disturbed. I wasn’t quite sure what it was supposed to mean. Was my head just playing mind games with me, making me watch my back? Why was it trying to make it seem like Jessica would be so mean? Besides, wouldn’t she want to see Nick happy? If she really loved him she would just let go and let it be, but maybe it was just the way love worked. When you can’t have the person you want you still try to get them or keep them or whatever the case may be. I’m sure that Sean knew what she was going through.

After about an hour of being awake the phone rang. I picked up hoping to hear his voice. “Hello?”

“Good morning beautiful.”

I broke out into a smile as I said, “You’ve been listening to too much country lately.”

“What? It’s how I feel. So how are feeling this fine morning?”

“Wonderful now that you’ve called,” I said, still with a smile of pure happiness on my face. Then with a little bit of confused wonder in my voice as well as on my face I said, “Especially after that strange dream from last night.”

“What was that, baby? Are you okay?” he asked quickly sounding very concerned.

“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just that I had this dream that Jessica was going to try to tear us apart and that she asked Sean to help her. But it didn’t make any sense because it was like months after we were dating.”

Sounding a little more relaxed he said, “Honey, you don’t have anything to worry about. I wouldn’t let something like that come between us even if it were true.”

“I’m sure it’s not, but I wish I didn’t have that dream.”

“It’s okay now babe, your hero is here.”

I started to smile again, “You just want me to say Nick to the rescue again don’t you?”

“You just did.”

“You’re so silly, I love it.”

“And I love you.”

“I love you too.”

I could just hear him beaming over the phone, “Those are the three best words in the English language when they come from you to me.”

“You are silly.”

“Only when it comes to you.”

“So what are you doing calling me? Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“Something better than talking to the most beautiful woman on the planet, uh..., let me think about that, no I don’t think so.”

“‘The most beautiful woman on the planet?’ Nick honey I think you’re delusional.”

“You put a spell on me, honey.”

“Uh uh, you put one on me. If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re a male siren.”

“Only when it came to finding my true love.”

“Yeah, that’s it. So what are you doing besides talking to me anyway?”

“Sitting in my hotel room trying to write.”

“Write what?” I asked curiously.

“Something about my inspirational source, so I had to call you because I was getting writer’s block.”

“Are you trying to tell me something?”

“Yeah. I needed to hear from my muse. Speaking of which I really think my muse’s writings could help unblock me.”

“Nice try.” I looked at my clock and realized I only had twenty minutes left to get to class, which happened to be on the other side of campus so I had to get going, “Baby, I’d hate to stop talking to you, but I don’t have much time to get to class, so we’ll have to talk later.”

“Okay bye, I love you and I’ll be thinking of you.”

“I love you too. Unfortunately I’ll probably be thinking of you too. You’re such a distraction to my work. Saturday can’t come fast enough.”

“You’re telling me.”

“Bye.”

“Bye,” he said and we hung up. I gave him the last word because I didn’t have the time to be in a last word war.

I got my stuff together and just headed out the door. Luckily I had dressed myself and had my things prepared before Nick called or I would have been in a mess of trouble. I had a smile on my face all the way to class. I even got there five minutes before class started.

During class all I could think about was Nick. Luckily my professor was the type that didn’t really call attention to you too much and I knew how to fake looking like I was paying attention. When class was over, it was a relief to me because I had only one thing on my mind and concentrating on class was hard. Unfortunately, the rest of the day went pretty much the same. But somehow I managed to make it through. I had a feeling that if Saturday never came I was going to fail all of my classes from lack of participation.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 14~

The rest of the week went pretty much the same way. When Saturday morning finally arrived I was so relieved. Then I started to feel anxious and nervous as I realized that Nick and I were about to go out on our very first official date. I went nuts. Before, when I had gone out with Nick, I never really worried about what to wear or where we were going. I just thought of it as two friends going out together. But now it was different. I felt like I had to impress him. I didn’t know what to do. My head was just screaming.

I got a phone call from him that morning too. “Hey beautiful. Did you sleep well?”

“Very well.”

“Really? I was a wreck. I couldn’t wait for this morning to start. I’m looking forward to spending the entire day with you.”

“Are you?” I asked intrigued and hoping to get a hint of what we were supposed to do for the day.

“Oh yeah.”

A smile spread across my face, “So what do you have planned for us today, oh handsome one?”

“Handsome one, I like that.” I started to giggle. “I love your laughter beautiful. Anyway, it’s going to be a surprise.”

“You don’t know, do you?” I said hoping that it would get him to reveal what he was planning.

“I do too,” he answered with mock offense. Then he started to laugh a little. It was so cute.

“Darn I was hoping your spontaneous side was going to show today.”

“I’m spontaneous. Sometimes anyway, but it still counts for something.”

“Yeah it does. But why can’t you tell me?” I asked trying to coax him into telling me something.

“It’s a surprise silly, if I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise anymore.”

“Oh tell me, I’ll still act surprised.”

“Don’t tempt me woman.”

“Woman? Nick.”

“What, it’s a term of endearment. It’s my other way of saying I love you.”

“Uh huh. Whatever. Now tell me.”

“Nope, you’ll just have to wait baby. So I guess I should go get ready. I’ll see you at five.”

“Five! But Nicky isn’t that a little early.”

“Baby, if it were really up to me I’d pick you up right now. I just don’t want to wait anymore. But I figured five was a little closer to date time.”

“So, do you have something planned for this long day of ours or just a piece of it?”

“If you ask me it won’t be long enough, but I could have all the time in the world and it wouldn’t be long enough.”

“You are so sweet.”

“Sweet on …”

Interrupting him I said, “Don’t even think about finishing that sentence Nicholas.”

“You. I couldn’t help it.”

“You’re not going to act like this tonight are you?”

“Tonight and for the rest of our lives together.”

“Jumping ahead again.”

“Can’t help it. I want you woman.”

“Nicky, you’ve known me for about a month and a half. We’ve only been together for a week; I’m not so sure you know what you want yet.”

“I knew it from the moment I first laid eyes on you. You’ll see it too one day.”

I mumbled to myself, “That day’s a lot closer than you think.”

He said, “Did you say something, baby?”

“I just said ‘I love you’.”

“It sounded longer than that, but I’ll take it. I love you too. Well I’m gonna leave you now to get ready, so I’ll see you at five.”

“Okay, see you then, I love you.”

“Love you more.”

“Not possible. Bye.”

“Bye and yes it is.”

“Nick I’m not playing this game with you, because I’m going to win. I love you more and that’s that.”

“Nope I do.”

“Stop quoting your songs. Now hang up the phone.”

“Okay bye.” Then he hung up.

I was going to win one sooner or later.

Well, I thought, better go take my shower, gotta look and smell good for my man. So I grabbed my stuff and started walking down the hall to the bathroom. Luckily for me, I had the place to myself. I was the only one in the bathroom. Community bathrooms in the dorm halls really made me paranoid. I just hated taking showers when others were, even though there were separate stalls and shower curtains, it still made me feel uncomfortable to know that something might go wrong and my shower curtain might fly open. I wasn’t very comfortable with my body either which made it worse.

When I finished taking my long hot relaxing shower, I got into my robe gathered my stuff and left the bathroom. Little did I know that there was going to be a hoard of guys standing around outside the bathroom. Talk about uncomfortable. You’d think living on an all female floor a girl wouldn’t have to worry about something like that. Well I guess when you live in the party dorm things like that are likely to arise. I just wish it didn’t happen to me. I started to walk by them as quickly as I could. I could just feel their stares. But worst of all were the whistles and hollers that I got. I could just hear the girls that were with them yelling at them for their inappropriate behavior.

When I got to my door I took out my keys and tried to unlock the door as quickly as possible. There was a guy behind me though.

“Hey Jenn,” I heard the masculine voice say.

I turned around and found myself face-to-face with Sean, “Sean, what are you doing here?” I asked quite surprised.

“I came to see you,” he answered.

“Why didn’t you call first?” I asked as I turned around and finished unlocking my door.

“I wanted to surprise you.”

“Surprised I am,” I said as I was opening the door.

“Nice…uh…robe.”

I suddenly became very aware that I was talking to Sean while still in my robe so I excused myself, “Oh, um, let me change first.” So I went inside, found some sweats and just threw them on. Then I opened the door and let him in.
“So what are you doing here? I thought I told you not to come around again until you grew up.”

“Actually you told me to call you when I stopped being a jerk.”

“Well?”

“Well I thought about it and I saw the error of my ways. I’m sorry. Can we still be friends?”

It was a hard question for me to answer right off the bat. Did he expect me to just forget everything that had happened to us? I mean I tried so hard to let him down easy and to keep him from hurting from it, but he ended up causing me pain afterwards. He even tried to make me feel guilty about everything, like it was my fault. You can’t choose who you love. I was quiet for a while before I started to talk to him again, “Sean, you hurt me. I tried so hard not to hurt you and you just took that for granted and hurt me. I didn’t want to do what I did to you. It just happened. I’m sorry that I don’t love you, and I’m sorry that I hurt you when I left you for Nick, but that didn’t give you the right to call me a bad person.” I was on the verge of tears again.

“No you’re right. And I don’t want you thinking that you are.”

“I know I was wrong for stringing you along. But I didn’t even really realize that I was. I just wanted us to work. But once other things started happening I just knew that it wouldn’t. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize it sooner. But at least it happened now and not later. If there was a way for a person to actually choose who they loved maybe you would’ve had a chance, but Sean, I didn’t have a choice. I fell in love with him long before anything started between us and I really, really am sorry to have put you in the middle of it all.”

“I know, I know, but I’ll never regret that we happened. And I’ll always cherish what we did have no matter how you were feeling when we were together. So are we okay now?” He looked at me with hopeful eyes. I thought that he was really able to move on. I really wanted to help him with it too.

“Well…” he gave me his puppy dog look and all I could think about was Nick’s puppy dog look but I could tell that at that moment he was being sincere. “Okay, I forgive you. And I hope that one day you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me too.”

Then he hugged me and said, “Oh Jenn you don’t know how good it makes me feel to hear you say that. And I forgave you long ago. Love has a tendency to do that. But I don’t really think that I had anything to forgive, you were only following your heart.”

We let go and we smiled at each other. My world finally felt at peace. “Good, I’m glad you feel better now. And it makes me feel better to know that you do forgive me, even if you don't think there's anything to forgive.”

“And I’m glad you’re happy.”

“Thank you Sean. I know you probably don’t want to hear this…”

“No it’s okay, what are friends for, right?” he said giving me a smile.

“Thanks, but Sean, he really does make me happy. And I love him so much.” I saw him twitch. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. Sean you made me happy too, but he makes me happy in a different way. I’m sure you’ll find someone who feels that way about you too.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Not any time soon,” he replied. “I know we’re just friends now Jenn, but it’s going to take a long time for me to get over the love I have for you. But it’s because of that love that I’ve seen the error of my ways and can let you find your true happiness. In fact I may never stop loving you.”

“You really have grown, Sean. And one day you’ll find someone new.”

“Thanks. It’s all because of you, ya know. I don’t think I would’ve matured as much without you in my life. And if I do somehow find someone else, she’ll have you to thank you for the new me.”

“No, it was all your doing.” Looking at the clock I realized I didn’t have much time. Knowing Nick he was sure to show up sooner than planned and I still had a lot of things left to do. “I’m sorry Sean, it was nice talking to you, but I have some things I need to take care of.”

“Oh I’m sorry,” then he got up to leave. I walked him to the door. “So we’re okay right?”

“Yeah, we are.” He nodded his head in satisfaction and went away. After I closed the door, I closed my eyes and just let the peace settle in. My world was at a nice calm once again. Okay, so Sean said he still loved me but he’d get over it sooner or later and I could tell he wasn’t going to try anymore funny business or so I thought.

Once I finished calming down and relaxing I started panicking again. What am I going to wear? I thought to myself. I started looking frantically through my closet for something good to wear. I found a couple of outfits, but they just didn’t seem good enough.

Then my eye caught the sight of something black and I looked up and I saw it. The perfect outfit. It was the dress I’d wanted to wear forever, but never found a reason to. I often thought about wearing it when dating Sean, but I never got around to it. I think I was saving it for that perfect moment. I’d always dreamt of wearing that dress on my first date with Nick, and the time had finally arrived. My first official date with Nicholas Scott Lachey. I must have been dreaming. If it was a dream, I didn’t want to wake up. I still couldn’t believe everything that had happened over the past month and a half. It was all so surreal. No one ever believes that their dreams can come true until they happen and mine finally did.

After reminiscing over what had been happening to me, I took the dress off its hanger and put it on. Every time I’d put the dress on before that, (just to make sure it still fit) it never really felt right. That night it felt perfect. It fit me in every way and I knew that the night was going to be more magical than any other night I’d had with Nick. The true beginning to the rest of my life.

At three I was finally ready. Once again I’d forgotten to eat lunch, but I couldn’t seem to tell, I was too excited. How could I even think about food, when all I had on my mind was the wonderful date I was sure to have with Nick? After about an hour there was a sudden knock on my door. I thought, No, not even Nick would be an hour early. But then I got up to answer it any way. You know I have a spy hole in my door and yet I never use it. I should have learned that it would have been my best weapon of self-defense against people. Sean was at my door again.

“Hi I just wanted to tell you that…” then as if suddenly realizing what I was wearing he said, “Wow you look amazing.”

“Thanks,” I answered a little shyly.

“Where was that dress when we were dating?”

“Hanging in my closet, looking for a good time to be used.”

“I wish I could’ve given it to you. But then again you looked good no matter what you were wearing anyway.”

“Why, thank you Sean. That’s sweet of you to say.”

With a smile he said, “Nothing’s too good for my baby.” Then realizing what he said, “I’m sorry, I’m still getting used to the fact that you’re not mine anymore.”

“It’s okay; I know it’s going to take time considering we’re still friends and all.”

“So what’s up? What’s with the outfit and you looking so beautiful tonight? Don’t tell me, you have a date with Nick.”

“How could you tell?” I asked.

“How could I not? You’re beaming. So is this your first official date with him?”

“Yeah, it is. So what did you want to tell me?”

“I just wanted to tell you that…”

I saw a finger tap his shoulder, “Excuse me,” I heard. Sean moved to reveal my love.

“Nicky,” I said as I hugged him. “You are too early.”

“Couldn’t wait anymore. I missed you too much this week.” Then he looked at Sean and said curiously, “What’s he doing here?”

I turned his head to face me, “I don’t know; he was just about to tell me when you interrupted, silly.”

He gave me a sheepish little grin, “Sorry,” then handing me my flowers he said, “Here you are, beauties for my beautiful.”

“Aw thanks sweetie.” Turning to Sean I said, “Anyway, what did you want to tell me Sean?”

The expression on his face was far from happy, surprised, or excited the way he used to look when he saw me. In fact the way he looked just seconds before Nick showed up. “I just wanted to tell you to watch out for all the creeps out there who are going to go after you now that we’re no longer together. One of them being my roommate. He’s a cool guy and all, but he’s definitely no good for you.”

“Thanks for the warning man, but I can take care of her,” Nick chimed in.

I looked at Nick and said, “Thanks, but no thanks Nicky, I can take care of myself.”

“Well that’s all, I w…wanted to say. I guess I’ll leave you two alone now.” He gave a little smile, a wave, and went away.

“Thanks,” I yelled after him.

Nick and I went into my room and sat down on my bed. Then Nick said, “He’s a pretty nice guy.”

I started to laugh a little at how cool he was trying to sound, “He wasn’t always that way, but yes he is now. I have no idea why, but until you came along he was never really a jealous guy either,” I added a bit sarcastically. Then I said, “And now he acts like things are getting way better.” A puzzled look came across my face as I said, “He told me that he’s happy for me and that he’s glad to see me happy with you and that his love for me has taught him to let me be happy, even if it’s with someone else.”

A tone of confused sadness in his voice, Nick asked, “Are you regretting your break-up with him?”

I smiled at him and said, “Are you kidding me? I’m finally with the man I’ve been dreaming of my whole life and you think I’m going to regret not being with someone I’d only considered dating after some really strange events? Please, I love you too much to regret being with you. What about you?” I asked suddenly realizing what he must’ve felt. “Are you sure you still want to be with me? Do I really make you happy?”

“You do now. I want to be with you more than anything in this world. God finally gave me my angel. I was wondering how long it was going to take,” he stated.

“What, didn’t you think Jessica was your angel?”

“Not my angel, maybe someone else’s. I’m still not sure what was going on in that relationship.”

“So you’re absolutely sure you want to be here?”

“Yes, I am. I love you and no one else.” He pulled me into his arms and held me tight.

As I snuggled closer into his arms I said, “Good, cause I don’t want to lose you now that I have you.” Then a thought occurred to me as I said, “Nicky, promise my something.”

“Anything baby,” he said as he pulled me even closer.

“Promise me, that if you ever find yourself unhappy with me or if something happens between us, you will look for new happiness and that you won’t stay with me just to keep me from hurting because I never want to see you unhappy again.”

“I can definitely promise that because I know that you are the only one who can make me happy, therefore I’ll never have to leave.”

I gave a little smile and said, “That’s good, but you have to make good on your promise, no matter how much it’ll hurt me, it’ll hurt me more if you’re unhappy with me, okay?”

“That’s something you’ll never have to worry about. But in that case, you have to promise the same.”

“I promise to try.”

“Well okay, for now.” Then we just sat there in silence in the bliss of each other’s arms for about a half an hour when Nick said, “What time is it, baby?”

I looked at my watch and said, “5:03.”

“Looks like I’m three minutes late for our date.”

I giggled as I got up and said, “You’re so silly, but oh so cute.”

“Cute, yesterday I got handsome and that was over the phone.” Then he held me again and said, “Maybe we should skip out on the plan and just stay here.”

“What, then I won’t get to find out what the surprise was.” Then standing up I said, “And I would’ve gotten dressed like this for nothing.”

Then as if he had suddenly noticed the way I was dressed for the first time he said, “You look...” *blink, blink* “incredible.”

“Thank you. So do you really want me to waste this dress wearing it my room?” I asked in mock distress.

Reaching for me and pulling me toward him again, he said, “I don’t think it’s a waste. You still look incredible and I can think of some fun to do here.”

I sat on his lap then kissed him on the cheek and said, “Tough luck, babe, you’re taking me out tonight. Besides it’s supposed to be our first official date remember?”

“Remember, how could I forget? I’ve been planning this forever.”

“So don’t let us lose the actual experience of your planning.”

“All right, you’ve convinced me.” So I got up and then he got up. He looked me in the eyes and said, “Are you ready for the most amazing night of your life?”

I put my hand on his cheek as I said, “Every night is amazing with you Nicky.”

Then he put his hand on top of mine smiled and said, “Well this is going to be the best my love.”

Smiling back I replied, “With many more to come I suspect.”

“Only the best for the woman I love,” then he took my hand off his cheek and kissed it.

“Well you already achieved that then by being mine.” Then we left my room.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 15~

After driving for about ten minutes we ended up at the park. It was the same park that I had my first and only picnic with Sean at. When I saw it my face fell. I hated thinking about what had happened the last time I was there. Nick saw the look on my face and said, “What’s wrong baby, I thought you’d like a day at the park.”

“Well it’s not that exactly it’s just...”

“What? You can tell me,” he said with concern in his eyes.

“Well it’s just that...” I started to think better of it, put a smile on my face and said, “Never mind it’s not important. What are we doing today?”

“Are you sure, honey? I don’t want to do this if you’re not going to enjoy it,” he said still concerned.

“I’ll be fine Nicky, you worry too much,” I said smiling at him.

“I can’t worry enough about you,” he replied putting a smile on too.

“Honestly Nicky, sometimes I think you think I’m too fragile.”

“You are to me.”

When he said that I had the most incredible urge to kiss him, but instead I said, “Well, what are we doing today, don’t keep me in suspense all day.”

“We’re going to have a picnic here.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes, and I have the perfect spot for us too.”

“Well lead the way.” He got out of the car, walked over to the passenger side and opened the door for me. He was such the gentleman. He took my hand and helped me out and everything. It was definitely every girl’s dream.

“Are you ready?” he asked me as he helped me out.

“More than you know,” I said as I got out of the car.

He made me stand there while he went to the trunk to get the picnic materials. Then he came back with a very large picnic basket and the traditional red and white checkered tablecloth. He extended his arm to me and said, “Let’s go milady.”

“Gladly,” I replied.

So we walked for a while and then we stopped. When I saw where we stopped, my face fell again. Apparently Nick and Sean were working with the same mind when it came to romance. I could only hope that Nick wouldn’t plan on using any jealousy tactics on me that night. He saw my face fall again. “Honey, I know something’s wrong. That’s the second time your face has fallen. Did I do something wrong?” he asked clearly worried.

“No, honey, it’s okay don’t worry about it. Let’s just have a nice picnic together okay?” I forced a smile onto my face again.

He walked me over to the spot and laid out the cloth. Then he blurted, “Sweetie, I can’t take it. I need to know what’s wrong.”

“Nicky, it’s got nothing to do with you.”

“Then why won’t you just tell me?” he asked, exasperated.

“Because I...”

“What?” he looked at me so tenderly and then out of nowhere tears started to fall down my cheek. Wiping away my tears Nick said, “Honey, you can tell me. I’ll make everything better.”

With the tears still flowing and my voice cracking as I tried to speak I said, “Nick this...this is where...where Sean and I had,” *sniffle, sniffle* “had our last picnic.”

“Babe, why didn’t you tell me?” he asked pulling me into his arms.

I put my head on his shoulder and said, “I didn’t want to ruin it for you. I thought I could handle it. It’s a big park, I didn’t think you’d bring me to the exact same spot Sean and I were.”

Continuing to hold me he said, “Baby, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.”

“I know you didn’t. I’m sorry, I’m acting this way,” I said looking up at him with tears still flowing.

Wiping them away, he said, “No it’s my fault. Why don’t we go somewhere else?”

Regaining control of myself and looking into his eyes I said, “No, I’m going to make the best of it and turn this place into a happy memory, with you.” I tried to smile.

“Great way to start off the date,” he said disappointedly sarcastic.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized.

Soothingly he replied, “No don’t be, it’s going to be okay,” then cheering up he said, “I’ll make you forget about that.”

“I know you will,” I said giving him another smile.

“I love you,” he said, warming me up inside.

“Me too.”

Then he started singing, “Gray skies are gonna clear up, put on a happy face.” Then he stopped.

“Aren’t you gonna finish it?” I asked, laughing and “putting on a happy face” so to speak.

“I would if I could, but I can’t. That’s all I know.”

I just smiled, “You are the best.”

“Only when it comes to you.” My smile widened. “Now that’s what I want to see. And look you even made the sun come out.”

I laughed a little harder as I said, “The sun was already out silly.”

“Well you’ve warmed my heart even more. And I need it; I’m not used to this Flagstaff weather. I think I’ve been away from it for too long.”

“Well come here then we can warm each other up.”

“I like the way you think Jenn.” So we just sat there holding each other again in happy silence. After a while Nick said, “Oh my gosh, I forgot about the food. It’s probably freezing cold by now.”

“It’s not that cold baby,” I said in my dazed bliss.

“But it’s still going to be cold. I wanted this to be so perfect for you and I blew it,” he mumbled to himself angrily.

I looked at him, “Honey, it is perfect. Being with you is what makes it perfect, not the food or the location, I get that now.”

“But still...”

“No worries baby, we’re together that’s all that matters,” then I kissed him. And then he deepened the kiss. It was heavenly.

When we pulled apart Nick said, “Well you’ve convinced me. But what are we going to eat?”

“I don’t know. What did you have planned anyway?”

“I made a pizza,” he said proudly.

“Pizza? Well isn’t that romantic,” I said as I squeezed him a little.

“It’s the thought that counts. Besides it’s what’s on the pizza that makes it special.”

“Ooo, what’s on it?” I asked, my curiosity sparked.

“I knew that would intrigue you.” Then he took the pizza out of the basket, “It took me a lot of work to convince a pizza parlor to let me do this. They thought I was nuts when I told them I wanted to make my own pizza.”

“Is it going to be like the one on the Disney special?” I said with a smile widening even more on my face.

“Something like that,” then before opening the box he asked, “You ready?” I nodded. When he opened the box I was very surprised. Nick had written out “For my love, Jennifer” with small bits of pepperoni on the pizza and the pizza was heart shaped. “Do you like it?” he asked.

“I love it,” I said as I hugged him. Then I pulled away and looked at him, “It is the thought that counts Nicky. And yours is worth millions. I don’t deserve you.”

“It’s quite the contrary my love it’s I who don’t deserve you.”

“Aren’t we the pair?” Then I turned my attention to the pizza, “I don’t know if I could eat that anyway. I’m sure it’s good, but why d’ya have to be so darn romantic about it?”

“‘Cause I love you. And I wanted today to be special.”

“You certainly managed that. I will never forget today as long as I live.”

“Me neither.” Then after a slight pause he said again, “But what are we supposed to do about food?”

“Men and their food!” I exclaimed looking at him.

“I didn’t eat today; I was too hopped up on seeing you today I forgot to eat.”

I gave a sheepish grin as I said, “I didn’t eat either.”

“We really are the pair aren’t we?”

“I guess so. Honey, you decide what to do and when you do, let me know. This is your chance to show me your spontaneous side.”

So we just sat there while he thought of a solution to our food problem. After about three minutes he said, “I’ve got it.”

“What?”

“I know what we can do.”

“What?”

“You’ll see.”

“Here we go again,” I said. Then he started packing everything up. I stood up to help him. When we finished he extended his arm again and I took it. Then we both kind of let our arms slide down and we ended up holding hands on our way to the car.

When we arrived at the car he let me in and then went to put the things away in the trunk. Then he got in. “Are you ready to show off that dress?”

“What are you talking about, you nut?”

“Well I’m taking you somewhere more public. I get to show more guys what they can’t have.”

“You dork,” I said smacking him in the arm.

“Well what can I say, I’m a guy.”

“So what, I’m supposed to be your trophy girlfriend? If you really wanted that you probably should have stayed with...” then I stopped I didn’t want to bring exes back into our date.

“I know what you were about to say and trust me, I’m happier now.” He smiled a warm smile at me and I smiled back. “I just hope everybody’s ready, because their day’s just about to get a whole lot brighter with you in their presence.”

“You are just too much for me to handle.”

“But you are and very well I might add.” Then he started the car. “Here we go.”

[Baby_Girl89]

After about thirty minutes of driving we arrived at our destination, yet another Italian restaurant. I think Nick was trying to fatten me up on pasta. We shared a plate of spaghetti and played Lady and the Tr@mp until the plate was finished. It was a long meal; the kisses took quite a long time to stop. The food got cold, but we enjoyed the kissing so much neither of us cared. When we finished eating the spaghetti we ordered some ice cream for dessert. We kept feeding each other. By looking at us no one would have known that it was only our first date. We were so comfortable with each other. I felt comfortable. It was never that way with Sean. I had a relaxed comfortabilty around Nick. With Sean it was more of a tight comfort. I had to keep my guard up no matter what we were doing, so I guess I was never really comfortable.

After dinner, when we were finally full Nick drove us back to my campus. We got out of the car and just walked around. It was a good way to get rid of some of those calories. But as it was getting darker, it was getting much colder. So we stopped walking and stood out in the open to look up at the sky. It was such a beautiful night and after all that had happened it really was the perfect night.

I looked at Nick and found him staring at me, “What?”

“You’re beautiful, you know that. I’m so lucky you finally agreed to us.”

I sighed then said, “I’ve wanted it for so long I still don’t know how I was so stupid as to let us wait a whole month to begin.”

“You’re not stupid, just cautious,” he said. Then he added with a little laugh, “I don’t think I would have trusted me either.”

“I love you Nicky,” I said as I kissed him.

“I love you too Jenn,” then he kissed me back and we embraced in another full on kiss. I just couldn’t get enough and neither could he apparently.

When we pulled apart I said, “This really has been the perfect night.”

“So have I made your dreams come true?”

“More than I could ever have imagined. You are my knight in shining armor.” Looking deep into his gorgeous blue eyes, I said, “Just hold me.”

“Can do.” So we sat down in the grass and he just held me. If I’d died and gone to heaven I never wanted to return to earth again. I didn’t know how life could possibly get better.

I eventually started to get a little tired and that’s when Nick suggested taking me back to my room. I didn’t really want to go, but he insisted. It really was getting late. But how can you tear a girl away from heaven? He held me in his arms as we went to my dorm while I had my head on his shoulder. We had to stop in front of the dorm so that I could unlock the door to the dorm and then we just kept walking that way until we got to the bottom of the stairs. Then we just had to hold hands. Once we got to the top we went back to the way we were before.

When we got to my room he walked me in. We sat down and I put my head on his shoulder again as he just held me. I didn’t want it to end, but as they say, “All good things must come to an end.” I had a goofy happy smile on my face that I just didn’t want to let go of. But it was getting near 2 a.m. and I couldn’t keep him anymore. And I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore.

He whispered in my ear, “I think I better go.”

I looked up at him, “Are you sure?”

“No, but if I stay any longer I’ll have to stay the night. And as much as I want to, that probably wouldn’t be a good way to end our first date.”

“Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”

“Besides, you look so tired. I think I should let you rest.” Then before he got up he whispered to me, “Good night my angel.”

“Good night Nicky.” Then I got up and walked him to the door. When we got to the door and he was standing outside I pulled him down for a kiss. It was one of the most passionate kisses we’d experienced together up to that moment; at least I thought it was.

When we let go he had this look of happy shock as I said, “Good night Nicky,” and shut the door. Ha, I finally won the last word war. I looked out of my spy hole and still saw him standing there with his slap-happy grin on his face. When he finally snapped out of it, I saw him start to walk away, and I heard him whistling that same tune he whistled that first night we’d spent together.

I locked my door, then turned around and walked to my bed. I got into bed only to realize I was still wearing the dress. I had to get out of bed and change into some pj’s. Normally I would go to sleep in whatever I’m wearing, but that would’ve been too much.

After I changed I hopped into bed and started to dream about the wonderful day I just had. All in all it was the perfect ending to a perfect day. I finally had the date I’d dreamt about. It wasn’t exactly the way I’d imagined it, but it was good enough just being with Nick. I started with a nice sweet dream that night. Then it turned into something unexpected.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 16~

My mind started drifting and reliving the glorious date I had with Nick. My mind was still trying to get a grasp that it all happened. I thought, Maybe I should write this in my diary before I really think it’s a dream. But then I thought, Nah, if it’s not a dream these glorious dates will continue to happen and if it was a dream I never want to wake up again. So I kept on drifting further and further into my dream state. Then the images started changing and I couldn’t go back to my wonderful memory, instead my head came up with that same awful dream I had before, but as a continuation.

Jessica was putting her plan into motion. After she talked with Sean they found a time and place to meet up to discuss matters in person. Jessica was willing to do anything to get Nick back. After they met up Sean found that her idea might actually work. He was willing to go along with the plan to get me back as well. But as most plans do, they weren’t planning on it backfiring on them.

Since Jessica and Nick were still friends, she decided to use it to her advantage, same thing went for Sean. They were both planning on using their friendship to worm their ways back into our hearts. It wasn’t going to work, but they didn’t know that. It was a pretty good plan and it might have worked if Nick and I weren’t so in love.

One week Nick had some things he had to attend to so we couldn’t see each other, his tour. That was the week the plan was supposed to start up. Jessica scheduled it so that she would spend that entire week with Nick and Sean was supposed to keep me busy that week.

“Nick,” Jessica said in “surprise” when she first spotted him at the hotel they were staying at, “Are you on this tour too?”

“Yeah, I am. I didn’t know you were going to be here Jessica,” he said, trying to hide his disappointment.

“I didn’t know you were going to be here either, what a coincidence,” she said, trying to sound all too innocent.

“Yeah, what a coincidence,” he muttered sarcastically.

She didn’t seem to notice as she continued with, “So, how’s your new girlfriend? I feel a little offended that I had to hear about it on MTV instead of from you,” she said, giving him her version of the puppy-dog look.

“I just didn’t think you’d want to hear about it, that’s all,” he said sincerely. That’s my Nicky always thinking about others first.

“Don’t be silly, what are friends for? So, how is the little darling?”

Nick decided to ignore the derogative remark, he knew how he felt and he knew I wouldn’t have wanted him to do anything about it anyway, “My girlfriend is fine thank you. But I gotta tell you I kind of regret agreeing to this. I miss her so much already and it’s been less than a day.”

Jessica was cringing at what Nick had to say. But she put on a big smile and said, “You always were the sweet one.”

“Thanks,” then he said, “You know what Jess, I’ll talk to you later. I told her I’d call when I got settled in so later.” He started to walk off.

“Do you always do what she tells you to?” she asked to his back.

He turned around and faced her, hurt and anger in his eyes, “Jess, I made a promise, and I’m not breaking it. You know me better than that.” Then he walked up to his room.

When he got there he called me. “Hello?” I said.

“Hi, baby, how are you?”

“Nicky, I’m fine. Is something wrong?”

“Why do you ask that?”

“I can hear it in your voice.”

“Well not exactly, but...”

“But what honey?”

“Jessica’s here.”

A little shocked and a bit suspicious I said, “I see.”

“But don’t worry about it honey, nothing’s going to happen.”

“I trust you honey. Don’t you think I trust you?”

“I do, and I wanted to keep that trust that’s why I’m telling you about her.”

“You are the perfect boyfriend. You can relax now baby, everything’s fine. I know you won’t do anything wrong.”

He breathed a major sigh of relief at the sound of it, “Thanks, I knew you’d be okay with it.”

“Of course, it’s not like you knew about it before you left.”

“I certainly wish I did.”

“Then what would you have done, stayed here with me?”

“That’s not a bad idea, how about I skip out on this tour? It’s only a week anyway.”

“Baby, you know I would’ve made you go anyway. You need this.”

“But I need you more,” he pleaded.

“Don’t worry about me. Besides it’ll make your visit back that much better.”

“Are you trying to make me take the next flight back?” he asked anxiously.

I laughed, “Nick you’re not helping yourself there baby.”

“I can’t help it I miss you,” he said.

“You’ve only been gone for a little while honey,” I said trying to comfort him.

“Does that mean you don’t miss me?” he asked in a sad voice.

“Are you kidding? I always miss the love of my life; I was just trying to be strong for the both of us.”

“Whew,” then after a slight pause he said, “Wait, that’s me right?”

Laughing I said, “Yes, silly.”

“Okay good, well I have to get settled in now. I love you and miss you.”

“I love you and miss you too.”

“Bye.”

“Bye-bye, see you when you get back.” Then we hung up.

Outside his door, Jessica was listening to his conversation thinking, You may have him now, but he’s not going to be yours for long. When she heard that the conversation was done she knocked on his door. He went to answer it not bothering to look in the spy hole.

“Hi Nick,” she said cheerily upon seeing him.

“Oh hi Jess, how did you find my room?” he inquired.

“I asked the people at the front desk what room you were staying in,” she said when she had really followed him there.

I thought that was supposed to be confidential, he wondered. “So what are you doing here now?” He was beginning to get uncomfortable. Even though they were supposed to be friends Nick wasn’t too comfortable with it yet. He kept thinking that maybe she thought that something could still happen between them again, even though he had clearly stated before, over and over again that it was over.

She just walked into his room with no permission and sat down on his bed. Since he was too polite to say anything he just let her through, “I just thought we could talk. I’m so glad that we’re on this tour together. I swear I would’ve been bored out of my mind without someone to talk to.”

“Yeah, I’m happy about it too,” he said as a sly smile started to form across his beautiful thick lips.

A smile spread across her face, “You are?”

“Yeah, now I have someone to talk to about my girlfriend,” he said in a daze.

Her face fell, “Oh.”

“You don’t mind do you? I think you’d love her if you just got to know her a little more. I was hoping to bring her along on this tour but she’s got school and all.” He started to get a glazed look in his eyes. “Maybe I should just go back and surprise her. There’s always the summer tours, then we can be together.”

“No, you can’t do that.”

Suspicion started to fill his eyes, “What did you say?”

“What I meant was, you can’t go back now that you’re here. Besides it’s healthy to spend some time apart.”

“Well I don’t want to do it now.”

“People are expecting you Nick, I’m sure.”

“Well you didn’t even know I was gonna be here,” he said eyeing her suspiciously, hoping she would slip up.

“Doesn’t mean the audience doesn’t,” she replied coolly. She was a tricky one she was.

“I guess you’re right, and my baby does want me to do this.”

“Why?” she suddenly asked curiously, hoping it was the break she needed.

“She said it’ll be good for my career.”

“Nick are you sure she doesn’t want you just for your money or your fame?”

“What, how can you say that?”

“I mean, look at you. You had your 98º success and now you’re on your own. Are you sure she’s not just using you?”

“Yes. Why would you say something like that?”

“I’m just trying to be a good friend. Just think about it that’s all. I mean if you two met under different circumstances I guess you’d have a right to be mad, but just look at the facts.” Then she got up to leave before Nick could say anything to her.

[Baby_Girl89]

* * * * *


Meanwhile in another part of the dream, I was back at home, having to deal with Sean. I had stupidly enough told him that Nick wasn’t going to be around for the week.

He came knocking on my door the first day, “Hello,” he said with a grin.

“Hi,” I said a little testily. As much as I trusted Nick I had no intention of trusting Jessica. I knew the girl was up to something. Unfortunately, I was so blinded by my suspicions of her that I couldn’t see what Sean had up his sleeves.

“I’m sorry am I interrupting something?” he could hear the edginess in my voice.

“No, I’m sorry I shouldn’t take it out on you,” I apologized.

“What’s wrong?” he asked in sincere concern.

I let him in and started to tell him my problem. “Come on in, this might take a while.” He came in and I shut the door then we walked over to my bed and sat down. “Nick just called me and told me some disturbing news.”

“What that he cheated on you?”

I shot him an evil glance, “Hey, be nice. He wouldn’t do that to me. Besides, who would be stupid enough to actually tell someone that?”

“Sorry.”

“Anyway, he told me that he’s with his ex-girlfriend.”

“You mean ex-fiancée.”

“How did you...?”

He had to try to come up with a quick excuse, “I remember that rock on her finger.”

“Oh right, anyway that’s why I’m a little agitated.”

“You don’t trust him,”he said more as a statement than as a question.

“Oh I trust him plenty; it’s her I don’t trust.”

Sean thought, And you have great reason to feel this way. I hope you don’t get hurt by all this but if you do I’ll be there to mend you. “Why don’t you trust her?”

“Gut instinct.”

“Why do you trust him?”

“Love. Besides I know she wants him back. I know I would if I lost him, but I probably wouldn’t do anything about it because I would want him to be happy.”

“That’s what I love about you, Jenn; you put other people’s happiness before your own.”

I looked down at my hands as I replied, “It can cause more pain in the long run sometimes, though.”

He put his hand on my chin and lifted my face to answer me with, “I know, but you thought it was the right thing to do. I’m just sorry I had to screw it up.”

“I screwed it up a long time ago. I thought you were going to be my cure for Nick, I’m sorry I ever led you on.”

“I’m not, those were the best months of my life, up until the end that is. But now we’re friends and that’s better than nothing.”

“Thanks Sean, you made me feel better.”

“And if his ex doesn’t see it that way than it’s her loss. She could probably use a friend like you.”

I giggled, “Yeah, I don’t think that would work so well.”

“Well I guess I’ll leave you to your thoughts.”

“Okay bye.”

He started to get back up and then he sat back down again, “Wait, can I ask you one more question?”

“Sure, why not.”

“Do you really love him or just the image of him? I mean he’s a celebrity and all, are you sure you’re not just living out some fantasy you’ve had and that it’s really real?” I opened my mouth about to answer when he said, “Don’t tell me, tell yourself. Think about it for a while and see what you really come up with.” Then he got up and left.

I woke up the next morning with a start. Could my dream be telling me something I didn’t want to hear? I thought about life before Nick ever came into my life. Then I thought about life with Nick as just a friend and then I thought about Nick as mine. I found that no matter what stage I was in, I was always in love with him. Therefore, the dream wasn’t anything to really worry about; it was perhaps a way to keep myself aware of what the future might bring.

Then I decided to go back to sleep. As soon as I closed my eyes, thoughts of the wonderful future ahead of me filled my mind. I dreamt about what other types of dates we could go on and a couple of different proposals that could happen. My mind hadn’t thought about those in a long time. When I was dating Sean I could never really see myself married to him, for Pete’s sake I couldn’t even kiss him. Nick brought out that side of me. I truly felt as if I could spend the rest of my life with him. An hour later I was fully awake and not likely to go back to sleep. So I stared up at my ceiling just thinking about what the future had in store for me.

After about a half an hour of staring at the ceiling I went to my music book and started writing furiously. Nick had once again re-inspired me to write. In the middle of my writing insanity I got a phone call.

I thought about waiting for the answering machine to pick it up, but I was curious. I had to see if it was my honey, “Hello,” I answered.

“Good morning beautiful.”

“Good morning handsome,” I replied with a smile on my face.

“Quick question.”

“Okay shoot,” I said, curious as to what this “quick question” of his would be.

“Can I come over?”

“Of course,” I replied, then I thought, That was it? That’s all he wanted to know? I had to admit it was a quick question.

“Okay, bye.”

“Wait, bye?” Then there was a knock on my door. Who in the world could that be? I wondered. I got up off my bed and walked over to the door. I opened it and he was standing there with a bouquet of roses and a big smile on his face. “You sneaky fox you. What would you have done if I said no?”

“Begged you until you said yes.”

“Without me hearing you?”

“Being a singer works wonders with your volume. And here are some flowers that aren’t nearly as beautiful as you, but are close enough. One day I’ll find some that match your beauty, or die trying.”

“Are you going to say that to me every time you bring me flowers?”

“Pretty much. So are we just gonna stand here or what?”

“Oh I’m sorry come in.”

He walked in and sat on my bed, then he said, “I like your outfit, clouds and moons look cute on you.”

I suddenly realized I hadn’t changed out of my pajamas, I looked at him and “Oops” was all that came out of my mouth. After putting the flowers down and walking toward him, I said, “Maybe I should change.”

He said, “Nah, you look fine the way you are.” Then he pulled me in for one of his patented passionate kisses of love and desire. I forgot all about my clothes. We only separated to get some air before diving right back in again. If I wasn’t awake before I certainly was awake by then. He fell back on my bed and all we could do was kiss. Then he rolled on top of me and before we it knew we were making out like crazy.

Then a voice in my head said, “You better stop this before it gets too out of hand,” another voice inside of me was telling that one to shut up, but I knew what I had to do.

“Nicky,” he stopped kissing me.

“Yeah baby?” he said between pants.

“I think we should stop. I don’t want it to get to out of hand.”

He just looked at me as if to process what I was saying, then he said, “You’re right, I’m sorry.”

“No don’t be, it was incredible I just don’t want to make love to you until I’m ready and by that I mean with anyone until I’m married. I’m sorry.”

He got off of me and said, “No, it’s okay.” Then with a twinkle in his eyes and smile on his face he said, “I’ll wait forever if I have to.”

“I know what you must be thinking, ‘Oh great another virgin.’ So I’ll understand if this is it for you. I know you were so close to not worrying about that...”

He put his hand on my chin and moved my head to look into his eyes, “Beautiful, I would never think that. I think that it’s great that you’re waiting for the right guy. I just hope I’m it.”

I smiled at him and he smiled back, “Nicky, you are the greatest.”

“No you are.” I hugged him and then gave him a quick kiss on the lips.

“So what do you want to do, now?” I asked him.

“I don’t know, what do you wanna do?”

“You came all this way just to tell me you don’t know what you want to do?”

“I know what I want to do,” he answered.

“Well what is it?” I prodded.

“Well I’m already doing it,” *pause* “I’m here with you.”

“That helps, and I’m already doing what I want to do by having you here.”

“We really are the pair aren’t we, my love.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” I stated. Then I said, “Well we could always watch a movie.”

“Sounds like fun to me. Do I get to hold you this time?”

“Definitely,” I said with an even greater smile.

“Sounds even better.” I continued to smile and gave a little laugh. “Better make it a comedy, I need to see that smile all day today.” I smiled even more at that comment.

“How about Robin Hood: Men In Tights?”

“Funny, but not that funny,” he replied.

“Why not?”

“Because, I need something milder for today, we’ll save that one for another day.”

“All right, how about Legally Blonde, then?”

“Better,” he said.

“I get it you just wanna watch Reese,” I teased.

“Forget it I’ll be watching you the whole time.”

“You did it again Nicky,” I said smiling at him.

“What put a smile on your face? I love doing that.”

“Nope, you blew your cover honey. Now I have to think of something that you’ll actually watch.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Oh yeah,” he said while taking me into his arms again and giving me the kiss of my life.

When we were done, I said, “All right, you’ve convinced me, we’ll watch Legally Blonde.”

Then I got up to get the movie and put it in. While we watched it he just held me as we were lying in my bed together. It was kind of nice just doing something pretty relaxing as a couple. He made me feel comfortable and I could feel that he was pretty relaxed too. Every once in a while I would feel his breath on my neck though and I’d have to look at him and say, “Watch the movie, ya nut.”

“It’s hard, when I’ve got something better to watch live.”

Then I’d just give him a peck on the lips and go back to the movie and then he would eventually go back to it too. I snuggled very closely into his body and felt his warmth intertwine with mine. I’d never felt so alive in my life. I never knew I could feel the way I did that day.

In the middle of the movie I got a knock on my door. I didn’t want to answer but it was just so persistent. I really had no idea who it could’ve been. Then I thought, Maybe it’s Sean. I don’t want to answer if it is, maybe whoever it is will just go away, if we’re real quiet. But what if it’s somebody who really needs to talk to me? The knocking just continued. I gave a groan and tore myself away from Nick. I answered the door and to my surprise it was my best friend Alex.

“Alex, what are you doing here?”

“Keeping you on your toes. Why are you still dressed in your pj’s?”

We were still standing there and I became a little hesitant about whether or not I should let her in, then I decided she had to meet him sooner or later. I should have opted for the later. “You better come in.”

She walked through the door and saw him lying on my bed then said, “What in the world is he doing here?”

“What a nice welcome from my friend to my boyfriend.”

“Look I know I said he was better than Sean, but not by that much,” she said in pure shock.

“It’s not what you think; he just came by this morning.”

“Well why are you still in your pajamas?”

“I didn’t have time to change when he came over. It was as unexpected as you being here.”

She started to breathe a little and said, “Okay, I’m calm now. I just didn’t expect to see this over here.”

“Sorry, if I’d known you were coming I’d have opted for a better way for you two to meet.”

“Ahem,” Nick let out. “I’m still here you know.”

I turned to him, “Sorry, baby. Nicky this is Alex. Alex this is well Nick.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard so much about you, even before you two met.” I nudged her. She kept going, “I’m glad you finally came to your senses and came to rescue this girl. She’s been needing it.”

“Alex!” I exclaimed.

As if she suddenly realized what she had said she said, “Oops, I shouldn’t have said that.” Then she looked at me and said, “Sorry.”

“Well I guess we’re even now.” Nick just stayed on my bed with his grin getting wider with each passing second.

Then he walked over to us took my hand in his and said, “Well, Alex you have nothing to worry about. I intend to keep this girl happy for as long as I live.”

Alex then said, “Well good, I was getting a little worried.”

“Alex,” I said, just for the sake of saying her name.

“What?”

“Never mind.” Then I walked over to my desk and pulled out my copy of the friendship book. I handed it to her and said, “I suspect this is what you came by for?”

Pulling out her copy she said, “Yep,” and we switched books.

* * * * *

Alex and I went to the bookstore at the school one day sometime around the beginning of our freshman year to just browse and as I was browsing I found this book. Like it was fate or something there was only two copies left. It was a friendship book and throughout the whole of it there are these quotes about friendship and stuff. I thought it was really cool, so on an impulse I decided to buy the books. We wrote in them daily, discussing whatever it was that happened to be bothering us or whatever it was that we felt like talking about. It was basically like writing in a diary, but you got answers instead of just letting it out. Sometimes the answers weren’t really answers but it was fun.

* * * * *

“So are you gonna hang around? We don’t mind really.” Then I looked at Nick, “Right Nicky?”

“No, no, it’d be fun to have some more company. You know what they say, ‘The more the merrier.’” Then he walked back over to my bed to sit down.

“I don’t want to really intrude in whatever it was that you two were doing,” she said.

“No intrusion, you’re my best friend. I mean you didn’t come all the way over here just to switch books now did you?”

“Well not exactly, but I wasn’t planning on seeing the two of you together this morning either.”

“So what? Then stay. It doesn’t make a difference to us.” I prodded. I didn’t want Alex to feel as if she had to go away every time I was with Nick.

“All right, I’ll stay,” she gave in.

Nick and I both said, “Good,” then I turned around and we looked at each other and started to laugh.

“It’s good to know I’m not the only one you do that with,” Alex commented.

I turned back to her and said, “I already told you that you weren’t. But it is odd that Nick picked it up so quickly.”

“See, we’re soul mates,” Nick interjected.

I plopped down next to him and said, “Do you really believe in that?”

“If it’ll help me keep you and yes I do.” Then he looked over at the empty bed in my room and asked, “Honey, I have a question for you.”

“Yeah, what is it?”

“Where’s your roommate?”

“Haven’t I told you this before Nicky?”

“I don’t think so. Where is she? I don’t think I’ve met her yet.” he said.

“Oh, didn’t I tell you? She moved out. She decided to live on her own and she finally scrounged up the money and moved out. If I didn’t tell you who did I tell? Oh right,” I turned to Alex and said, “I told you, didn’t I?”

“I think you wrote in one of the books.”

Then I looked at Alex as she was still standing, “You can sit down you know?”

“Oh right,” she then walked over to the empty bed and sat down, then she looked at the TV and said, “You’re watching Legally Blonde?”

I looked at the TV and said, “Yeah, I thought I needed to hone up on my legal skills,” then I looked at Alex and said, “that and Nick wanted to watch Reese.”

Nick started to tickle me and said, “You little liar. I never said that, you did.”

“Stop, stop,” I said through giggles, he stopped and it took me a while to calm down before I said, “You know that’s what you wanted.”

Alex just sat off to the side ignoring us. It was probably for the best. When we stopped messing around we turned our attentions back to the TV. Then I turned to Alex and said, “What are you planning on doing later today?”

“Homework, hopefully.”

“Let me guess, that would be sitting at the computer reading your fan fictions?”

“Only when my head starts to hurt.”

“Well how about going shopping today? Like Target maybe, there’s something I need to check out.”

“Sure, why not?”

Then Nick said, “Hey, what about me?”

“You’re coming with us you nut. We need you to drive.”

“Sure use me and abuse me,” he said in mock despair.

“You’re silly,” I said as I started to tickle him. When we finished our tickle fight we resumed watching the movie.

When the movie was over I got up and said, “Well I better get dressed then, can’t go shopping in my pj’s.” I started rummaging through my clothes to find something decent to wear. When I found something I said, “Okay, I’m gonna go change now, so you two behave. Watch whatever you want, it makes no difference to me. I’ll be back in a jiffy.” Then I left the two alone. On my way to the restroom all I could think about was hoping that they got along. It’s always nice when your best friend and boyfriend can get along. The whole time I was gone I was just hoping against hope that it would be okay between them.

But when I got back to my room it was so quiet it was eerie. I could only hope things were okay. Nick was staring up at my ceiling just whistling and Alex was watching something on TV. Okay so it wasn’t that quiet, but I thought maybe they’d talk. It didn’t seem like a Nick thing to do, to just lie there.

“Well aren’t you two chattering it up?” I said sarcastically, “Don’t stop just because I walked into the room.”

I walked over to Nick and sat down next to him. Then I put my face right in front of his and said, “What are you looking at?”

“Well, you now, beautiful.”

Then I sat up and said, “Well now what are you looking at? I mean I’ve looked up there a million times since I’ve been here and I never found anything interesting about it before. Tell me Mr. Lachey what do you see in my ceiling?”

“Nothing really, I’m just thinking about the future.”

“Can you see that in my ceiling?” when I said that he sat up and looked at me.

Then as he gazed deep into my eyes with his forehead on top of mine, he said, “Not in your ceiling, but in your eyes.”

Then I pulled us apart and said, “All righty then. Well we should get going now.” I turned my attention to Alex and said, “You ready?”

“What?” she said absent-mindedly. Alex had a habit of getting too involved with whatever it was she was watching.

“I said, ‘you ready?’”

“Oh, yeah, let’s go.”

“Okay then.” I turned off the TV and she got up and then Nick got up too. We all walked to the door. They went out and I had to turn around and grab my stuff. Then I walked out and locked the door.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 17~


After a nice long day of being with my best friend and boyfriend, Nick and I dropped Alex off at her place at about six. Then he drove me home. We went back to my room and just sat in silence. I don’t know about Nick, but I still felt like I was in heaven. He held me in his arms and everything seemed like it really was going to work out okay. But then suddenly out of nowhere a flash of the dream from the night before appeared in my mind and I jerked myself forward in Nick’s arms.

He sat up, still holding me and asked me in a worried voice, “Baby, what’s wrong?”

I just sat there with a shock and worried look on my face and then I squeaked out, “Oh no.”

Nick started to get really worried then. Then he tilted my face upwards to meet him in the eyes and said, “Honey, what’s wrong? What’s got you so upset all of a sudden?”

Fear, glazed my eyes and I said, “Jessica.”

“Baby, what’s Jess got to do with it?”

As I looked him in the eyes I said, “Nicky, I know you said that this was ridiculous once before and I wanted to believe you but last night...” my voice trailed off as I started to remember pieces of the dream and I started to look away.

He turned my head to look at him again, “What, baby, what happened last night?”

“I...I dreamt that Jessica was trying to get you back again. I don’t even know why this is really getting to me. I know that you wouldn’t go back,” *pause* “would you?” I asked shakily.

“Oh baby,” he said, embracing me and trying to comfort me. “Honey you have nothing to worry about.”

Still worried, I said, “I know you keep telling me that. And I trust you, but something’s just getting to me. Don’t get me wrong honey, I’m not jealous or being insecure about this I mean if it were some other girl I don’t think it would matter as much it’s just that you were engaged to her,” I said as a lump started to form in my throat.

“I know, baby, but I can’t change the past,” he said calmly and soothingly.

“And I’m not asking you to. I just think that she’s still going to try to get you back and I’m just afraid that maybe she might be able to succeed,” I said looking away again.

“It won’t happen that way. I’m not leaving you.”

His patience amazed me, “Really?” I asked looking up at him.

“Really.” I gave him a smile. “Now that’s what I want to see,” he said smiling back. My room as well as my heart brightened and the mood became calm once again.

“Thank you,” I said.

“No, thank you.” Then he said, “You know what I was saving this for later, but I think now might be a good time for it.”

I gave him a questioning look, “What?” I said.

“You’ll see,” he just sat and thought for a little while. Then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a sheet of paper. Seeing that it was what he wanted he put a look of satisfaction on his face. Then he said to me, “If this doesn’t prove my love to you then I don’t know what will.” I stared at him confused. Then he started to sing,

”I was so lost, going out of my mind.
I knew you were out here, but I couldn’t find you.
Then one magical day arrived and you walked into my life.
Now I know that I’ve found heaven,
A purpose to my life has come.
I can’t believe that I’ve found you now,
Girl you mean the world to me.
My love for you surpasses any other.
I think I’ve found my destiny.”

Then he stopped and looked at me.

I looked at him and said, “That was amazing.”

“Thanks, it’s not done yet, but this comes straight from the heart, no gimmicks no time crunch just true feelings for you.”

“Is this what you went to the hotel to work on?” I asked on the verge of tears.

“Yeah, I wanted to wait until it was done to sing it to you, but I needed to do something to make you realize that nothing can come between us now.”

I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulled him close and smiled as I said, “Nothing,” then I kissed him.

When we pulled apart I put my head on his shoulder and then a thought seeped into my mind. I thought that maybe it was time he actually heard one of my songs. I was actually willing to put myself “on the line” so to speak. It was time to face reality. “Nicky,” I started.

“Yeah, babe.”

“I think, I’m ready for you to hear one of mine now.”

“Really?” he asked happily surprised.

I lifted my head, looked him in the eyes, and said, “Really. I figured you did this and now it’s time for you to know how I really feel. How I’ve always felt. Think of it as an apology for the month we lost because of my stupidity,” I sighed.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to you know. I only did that because I wanted to reassure you of my love,” he said cautiously. Even though I could tell that it was what he wanted, he also wanted to make sure that I was comfortable with it. It’s one of the reasons I love him so much.

“I know, and I want to,” I replied, “Unless you don’t...”

“No, I do, I really do want to hear you. I just don’t want you to feel pressured.”

“You are so sweet. I love you.”

“And I love you.” *Kiss.* Then I got up and went to find my notebook. “Which one are you going to sing for me my love?” he asked.

“I’m not sure yet.” I said as I sat down and put the notebook in my lap. I opened it to the title page and asked, “Do you have any requests,” and then I added quickly, “For anything besides the one titled ‘Nicholas’?”

“Drat, you read my mind,” he said smiling and snapping his fingers.

“Maybe one day Nicky, but not today. In all honesty I wrote that one to just let myself express in song what I just randomly wondered all the time. I don’t know if I could ever really make it into a song to be sung for others, especially now that you’re here. I did used to sing it, hoping you’d hear me, but it was just some fantasy.”

“Was that the beautiful voice I heard?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no way you could’ve heard me singing the song.”

“Maybe I did. Anyway, could I ever read it?” he asked eagerly.

“Only time will tell,” I answered slyly.

“Fair enough, although I grow more curious as the days go by.”

“Good I like keeping you curious, you’ll stay around longer that way,” I said with a smile.

He smiled back and said, “I’ll be around forever, I’m not sure how much longer you can get from there.”

I simply stated, “Eternity.”

“Touché.” Then he looked up and down my list looking for a song for me to sing to him. Then he said, “Do all of these have to do with me?” I’m pretty sure I knew why he asked too. There were a few songs on that list that would certainly have been a scary thought if they were about him.

I shook my head no. And he sighed a sigh of relief. I guess he forgot about the time I told him that he was an inspiration to most of my songs not all. Then I said, “But a good majority of them are, so you probably have a three in four chance of picking out one that is.”

He raised an eyebrow that said, “Really,” then he went back to looking at the titles. I watched him as he tried to pick something out. He looked so entranced that I was inspired.

While he made his search for the perfect first song, I thought about life. I never would have truly thought that I could be with him if I hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes. I still didn’t think it was real. My life before Nick was filled with so much pain and misery that it really didn’t seem real to have him with me. It seemed out of place, yet right. Maybe that’s how I knew that it was still real. But what I couldn’t seem to understand was why did he choose me? Why did he leave Jessica to be with such a plain girl? I had nothing that Jessica didn’t already have. In fact I personally thought she was a lot prettier than I was, why would Nick choose me over Jessica? It didn’t seem to make any sense to me.

I often thought these thoughts before Nick ever showed up. It was during the time when I was trying to get over him in the first place. I thought to myself, Even if we ever were to meet, it wouldn’t make a bit of difference. He loves Jessica, he wouldn’t just leave her for me. He wouldn’t have a reason to, I’d think. Why am I being so foolish, there’s nothing that I could possibly offer him, that he can’t get somewhere else. Besides, I thought, he would probably only see me as some fan and not even give me a second thought. I had spent two years torturing myself over the fact that we could never be. But somehow, it never stopped the love I felt for him. In fact it still grew stronger no matter how hard I tried to fight it off. And then lo and behold, one day he just stepped into my life, reversing the process of what little work I had accomplished in trying to push him out. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I now believe that there was a purpose to it all. I think it was a way to prove to myself that love really can come in many different forms. I never would’ve thought that I would fall in love with someone I didn’t know, but it happened. And apparently it was the same way for Nick, only his was probably worse than my predicament. I often thought that maybe the real purpose was for me to just write my music but now I know that I had to feel the pain before I could really feel the joy.

[Baby_Girl89]

Anyway, Nick eventually snapped me out of my thoughts by saying, “Mmm, I don’t know they all sound so good.”

“What?”

“I said, ‘they all sound so good.’”

“That’s what I mean, what? Nicky I think you’re missing some of those titles. I know some of them wouldn’t exactly be a mood lifter.”

“All right then what I mean is they all sound interesting,” he said looking at me before turning back to the list.

“I guess that’s better. Have you come up with anything yet?”

“Well I’m torn between everything, but I think ‘Angel on Earth’ and ‘The Perfect Night’ are tearing me apart,” he said looking at me again.

“Well why don’t you just play eenie-meenie-minnie-moe?” I asked him.

“Because I gotta choose the right one,” he looked back at the list again.

Hearing the desperation in his voice, I said, “I’ll tell you what, I’ll sing them both.”

He looked at me, “Really?”

“Yeah, but I think after the first one you won’t wanna hear the second one.”

“I don’t think so.”

“Whatever,” so then I first sang to him “The Perfect Night.” When I finished he just stared at me. “Say something,” I said after a few seconds of silence.

“Wow,” was all he could get out.

“‘Wow?’ Is that a good ‘wow’ or a bad ‘wow’?” I asked. I wanted so much for him to like it.

“It was a good ‘wow,’ a very good ‘wow.’ It was better than I ever imagined. I never would have thought up something that amazing.”

I looked at him a bit confused. “Huh?”

“It’s just when I read the words, they were great, but when you sang them I...I...I have no words.” I just kept staring at him. When he finally found his way back to reality he said something else that put me into shock. “Jenn I have a confession to make.”

“What is it, honey?” I asked. I could only hope that it wouldn’t be anything horrible.

“Before I ever laid eyes on you here in reality I dreamt about you all the time.”

“Didn’t you already tell me that?” I asked, still confused. He wasn’t making any sense.

“Well yeah, but there’s something else.”

“There is?” I said, then I thought, What else could there possibly be that he has to tell me about it now, like this?

“I used to dream about you singing to me. I always felt that you had this amazing gift and that it was one of the reasons I had to find you. That’s why when we first went over your songs I wanted to hear you. And now that I have I know I’m right. In fact you’re better than what I thought and that was pretty darn good in itself, but that was incredible.”

I started to laugh a little at what he was saying to me. I always imagined Nick telling me that I was good, but that was just ridiculous. I wasn’t that good, “Nick, are you kidding me? I mean most people have told me that I’m good, but that might be going a little far. It’s not like I have a voice that can sweep the nation.”

“No, better,” then he paused for dramatic affect before saying, “the world.”

“Honey, don’t you think you’re pushing it a little too far? Maybe you’re just blinded by your love for me.”

“I’m not, baby, I had dreams about you going to the top.”

“But those were dreams honey. Not all dreams become reality.”

“But this one can.” Then as if suddenly remembering he said, “So how about ‘Angel on Earth’ now?”

Snapping my fingers I said, “Darn. I thought you would’ve forgotten about it.”

“I would say that you could back out of it, but I’m not going to let you because I can’t get enough of that heavenly voice. I now understand why you’re not in heaven with the rest of the angels.”

“Oh, and why is that?” I asked, hey you can’t blame a girl for being curious.

“Because they were all so jealous of your beautiful voice that they had to let you go before chaos broke loose. I must selfishly say, I’m glad they did, because then I wouldn’t have found you.”

“You are so full of it. What dream world are you living in Nicky? Are you sure you’re still on planet Earth?”

“Yes and from what I can tell, forgive me father, it’s better than heaven itself.”

“And how would you know that?”

“Because you’re here.” All I could do was smile. Then he said, “Okay, I’ve got to hear this song now.”

“All right, hold on, I need to remember how it goes. There are so many melodies going through my head I can’t seem to keep them straight.”

“Take your time.”

I composed myself all the while thinking, I’m in love with a madman. What was I thinking? Although I must admit he is the sweetest man on earth

* * * * *

There was a time when I once told a guy friend of mine that I was working on becoming a siren. I was beginning to wonder if maybe I’d accomplished it. He told me that I sang with such feeling and that he liked my music. It was strange how I never really sang for Sean though. It seemed to me that I sang for practically everybody but him. Maybe I thought that he wouldn’t really like my music. Don’t get me wrong Sean heard me sing before, but never while we dated. But if I can recall he really only heard me during high school. I often wondered if he’d remembered. He never really mentioned anything about it to me, at least not until later.

* * * * *

After calming myself for a bit I dove in. He just sat there and stared at me. It was a little unnerving, I’d never just been stared at by anyone in that way and it freaked me out a little. I could see tears start to well up into his eyes. Then I looked at him hopefully and said, “Well?”

“Was...was...was that for me?” he asked all choked up.

“Yes, it was,” then I walked toward him and started to wipe away his tears. Then I said, “Isn’t this a change? You’re usually wiping away my tears.” We both laughed.

“That was so beautiful. I can’t believe you wrote that before us.”

“I wrote a lot before us, Nicky. I loved you that much. I still do.”

“I love you too. Most of my songs were inspired by you too, ya know. Look another thing we have in common.”

I smiled, I couldn’t help it, you had to love his enthusiasm. “Nick you don’t have to convince me of anything, you already have me.”

“I know I just like making my point about how good we are together.” I snuggled my head onto his shoulder and just started to relax when he said, “So do I get to hear another one?”

I softly said, “Don’t push your luck Lachey.”

“It was worth a shot. Can I ask you something?”

“What?”

“Ever thought about using your talents professionally?”

I looked at him, “Why?”

“Just curious.”

“Well...yeah kinda,” I said looking away. “Remember I even have a stage name for myself.”

“Oh yeah,” he said in that I’m coming up with a scheme tone of voice.

“But don’t get any ideas Nicky.”

“But why? You have me now and I know what to do to help you out.”

“Because I don’t want you to end up thinking that I’m only with you to use you for this.”

“But I won’t think that,” he said kissing my forehead.

I looked up at him and said, “Well let’s wait first. Give me time. This is all happening so fast. I never want you to think that I’m using you for anything.”

“I know darling, I know. Why are you so worried about it?”

I thought for a moment trying to come up with a good answer. I couldn’t possibly tell him that it was because of my dreams. He would have thought I was nuts or something. I just didn’t want to go through something like that again. “Um...just a feeling. I don’t want someone to try and convince you that I’m only using you.”

“Not gonna happen. If that were true you wouldn’t have been trying to push me away to begin with.”

“Very nice observation.”

He smiled, “I know.” Then he pulled me in for another one of his sensuous kisses. My friends were right, once you knew what a kiss felt like you just can’t get enough. I know I couldn’t. Then I thought about the kiss I gave to Sean. I still hadn’t told Nick about it. Did I have a need to or could I keep it to myself? It wasn’t like we were together yet anyway. Besides it wasn’t that big a deal, Nick kissed Jessica a hundred times or more, what was one tiny peck? I decided to just let it go. Nothing happened since then so it was nothing to worry about. “Wanna know something?” he asked after we finished kissing and turned back to the silence.

“I don’t know, do I?” I replied.

“Well I’ll tell you anyway. That entire time we were ‘just friends’.” I giggled at his tone. “I felt like I was living the life of ‘Why’.”

“What do you mean, honey?”

“Well I thought, we act like we’re dating, but we’re not. You’re with him and he’s breaking your heart and I’m here trying to fix it. I finally really knew what it was like to be a part of that song.”

“Funny, I kind of felt the same way. Only thing is, you let me know how you felt. The song never mentions anything like that.”

“That’s true. But I think that made it worse.”

“I’m sorry, baby.”

“No, I shouldn’t have behaved that way, but I can’t help it girl you have that effect on me.”

“Quoting more country songs are we?”

“What?”

“Never mind.” “You Have That Effect on Me” happens to be a Brad Paisley song that I like and Nick saying that just reminded me of it.

Then we just kind of sat there in the silence again. Then I said, “Nick, you’re too comfortable. I’m going to end up falling asleep on you.”

“Are you tired?”

“A little,” I had to admit.

“I’m sorry, babe, I guess that means I should leave.”

Yawning I said, “Do you want to?”

“Honestly? No, but you need your sleep, seeing as how you’ve got classes tomorrow.”

“Thank you baby,” I said getting up.

“For what?” he asked, getting up too.

“For being so understanding,” then I yawned again.

“Hey, nothing’s too good for my girl.” I smiled. Then we walked to the door. I opened it and he stepped out. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“I know you will.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Nicky.” Then we had a “quick” good-bye kiss before he headed off. He kept turning around as he was walking down to the end of the hall. I stayed out to watch him leave until he rounded the corner and was out of sight. Then I went back into my room and fell asleep.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 18~



Two months after his wondrous arrival and a month after our union my birthday snuck up on me. I woke up that morning feeling the happiest I ever felt on a birthday. Usually to me it was just another day to get older one more year. But my nineteenth birthday was one for the books because it was to be my first with the love of my life. Nick still had been bugging me about my singing, but I didn’t care, somehow, it just didn’t seem to matter. I was just loving my life and loving the day, knowing it would be wonderful.

As soon as I started to get up my phone rang. “Hello?” I answered.

“Good morning beautiful,” I heard a voice say.

“Good morning Sean,” I replied. I was a bit mixed up about how I was supposed to feel. Sean and I were still friends, but something still got to me every time he called. “What’s up?” I asked.

“Well I just wanted to wish my most favorite person in the world a happy birthday that’s all.”

“Why thank you Sean,” I said to him. “And I want to wish you a Happy Earth Day. Better go plant a tree. You can make it my gift.”

“Thanks, but I have something better,” then he quickly added, “I will do something for the earth today though.”

“Good. Well I have to get going, I’ve still got a long day ahead of me before I can do any celebrating so good-bye.” And just as I hung up my phone it rang again. I thought, Who could that be? “Happy Earth Day,” I said.

“Well happy birthday to you angel.”

“Nicky, you remembered,” I said happy to hear his voice, as a smile crossed my lips.

“Of course I remembered angel. You didn’t think I’d forget about the day when my angel was born would you?”

“You always know how to make me feel better. This is going to be a good birthday indeed.”

“Of course, ‘cause you’ll be spending it with me.”

Normally I would have made a little joke about that but all I had to say was, “You know what Nicky, you’re right. Because of you this will definitely be a birthday to remember. But baby, I have to go now. I need to get ready for classes.”

“All right, well I’ll call you later.”

“I know you will, bye baby.”

“Bye, I love you.”

“Love you too,” and then we hung up. Boy did that conversation cheer me up. I felt marvelous. I couldn’t wait to spend the day with my honey. I didn’t care what we did, all that mattered was that I would be with him.

And once again before I could even think about getting dressed my phone rang again. “Hello?” I answered.

“Hi, Jenny, it’s Mom.”

“Hi Mommy,” I said. I was too happy to care what I called her.

“I just called to say happy birthday.”

“Thanks Mom.”

“Okay, I have to go back to work now, I’ll talk to you later okay.”

“All right Mom, bye,” and we hung up. It was strange when I lived in Phoenix my mom and I had a pretty bad connection, but once I moved to Flagstaff my mom and I became closer. I think the separation turned divorce between my parents actually made my mom and I closer although it didn’t do much for my younger brother or sister.

Anyway I was finally free to get ready for my classes and luckily I had woken up early enough and everyone decided to call in enough time to actually let me have time to fix up.

After classes and before I headed home for the day I got one more happy birthday from Alex. “So happy birthday. You know I wish nineteen is a birthday really worth celebrating.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well there’s your sweet sixteenth where you can or least were allowed to get your license...”

“Well...”

“Okay, you still can as long as you’re a very careful driver and then there’s eighteen where you become an official ‘adult’ but there’s nothing for nineteen.”

“I know what you mean, but this nineteen year old’s birthday is going to count for something. And I’ll make sure that yours does too in three days.”

“I still think it’s really weird that we were only born three days apart,” she said.

“I know, I love it. And I love being able to say that I’m older than you, even if it is only by a few days.”

“Yeah, well it’s not going to matter much later on.”

“Oh come on even twins use an ‘I’m a minute older or younger than you’ thing so whatever.”

“Whatever,” she said. “So what are you planning on doing today? Anything special planned?”

“Aside from spending my day with Nick, nada.”

“Well you two have fun.”

“Thanks, I know we will.” Then I handed her the book while she gave me hers and then I said, “Well I better get going.”

“Okay, see you tomorrow, and once again have a happy birthday.”

“You know there was a time when all I would want to answer is ‘what’s so happy about it,’ but now I know why.”

“Good, bye.”

“Bye,” and I left her room and was on my way home.


* * * * *


When I got home there were a couple of messages on my answering machine. Most of them were from family members who wanted to wish me a happy birthday saying they’d call back later. Then when I got down to the last five messages I heard my baby’s voice on the machine. He even sounded sexy talking into a machine. Then as I picked up the phone to call him my phone rang, so I answered it, “Hello?”

“Hey baby, you’re home,” I heard him say with a tone that indicated surprise and a face that was definitely smiling.

“Yes, and what’s with you leaving me all those messages you nut?”

“Well at least it’s not as bad as that one time.”

“No I guess not.”

“I figured, I’d leave you fewer messages, but of course it doesn’t mean that I called less.”

“I didn’t think it would.”

“You know honey, you should really think about leaving a singing greeting on the machine.”

“Um...I don’t think so.”

“It was just a thought.”

“Nice try Lachey.”

“I know, so are you ready for the best birthday ever.”

“It’s already started.”

“Well there’s plenty more where that came from. How ‘bout I pick you up in about two hours?”

“Sounds great, see you then. I love you baby.”

“I love you too angel. Bye.”

“Bye.”

I spent the next hour or so trying to get ready and talking to family members who called back. But when I got a good chance I made sure that everything was perfect. I wanted to look dazzling for my first birthday date. Nothing was going to ruin my day. Then about a half an hour before Nick was supposed to show up there was a knock on my door. I was so hyped up. I walked to the door, had the biggest smile on my face, and opened the door thinking that I would be seeing Nick, but instead I found Sean. No big deal, I thought to myself, This doesn’t have to be a bad thing. “Well hello Sean,” I said still smiling.

“Hi, wow you look amazing,” he replied.

“I seem to remember you saying that before.”

“Well you always look amazing what can I say?”

“So what’s up?” I asked him.

“I just thought I’d drop by and give you your gift.”

“Sean, I told you, you didn’t have to do that,” I told him still smiling. Then as an afterthought I said, “I told you to go plant a tree.”

“Well I couldn’t help it, I saw this in the store and I thought of you. I had to get it. Actually I bought this when we were still dating and I just never found the right time to give it to you, so I guess now is as good a time as any.”

He handed me a black velvet box and I opened it to find a necklace with an angel pendent. It was so tiny and so adorable, “Sean, it’s wonderful, thank you so much,” I said giving him a hug.

“Nothin’ to it. Turn the angel around,” he said motioning one of his fingers in a circle for me to follow suit.

“Okay,” so I turned the angel around and as small as it was it was still able to hold the words, “My angel always and forever Jenn, Love Sean,” I read aloud, then I said, “Sean I don’t know what to say. I don’t deserve this,” I said trying to hand it back to him.

He was pushing it back toward me as he said, “Yes you do. Jenn, you are my angel because you saved me.”

“From what?” I asked him with a quizzical look on my face.

“From myself.”

“What?” I asked still a little confused.

“You helped me to change and now I can lead a better life than before. I’ll never forget that and I’ll never stop loving you for helping me find myself.”

“Sean I can’t take all the credit for it. You had to realize what needed changing, I was just there for moral support.”

[Baby_Girl89]

Then I heard a voice say, “Ahem, excuse me you’re in my way.”

Sean moved over and Nick came into view, I gave him a hug and squealed, “Nicky, baby I’m so happy to see you.”

“Me too,” then he handed me a heart shaped box of chocolates and a bouquet of carnations of varying colors. “Once again the flowers pale compared to you. Now I know this is going to sound kind of mean baby, but why is it Sean always gets to see you first on our important date days?”

“I don’t know baby, it just seems to happen that way.”

“I’m sorry Nick, I just thought I’d drop by and give her, her present that’s all, I’m sorry if I’ve interrupted something.”

“No, it’s okay Sean, I was just curious,” Nick said, very diplomatically. I had to hand it to him, most guys would’ve been flying off the handle if something like this happened to them, especially Sean, but that’s one of the things that I loved about Nicholas, his trust in our love and in me.

“Well I better get going, I hope you two have a nice time tonight,” Sean said trying to sound cheerful forcing a smile.

“Thanks,” I said, trying to return his smile.

Then he gave me a real smile, “No prob,” he said, looking me in the eyes, I could see how he still hurt every time this happened. But I knew that one day he would have to get over it I just didn’t know when.

Sean stopped smiling then walked away with his head down, but Nick didn’t seem to notice or at least pretended not to and said, “Wow angel you look gorgeous. How did I ever get so lucky? I swear you get more beautiful every time I see you.”

“Oh stop it Nick, you have me already you don’t need to shower me with endless flattery every time you see me.”

“I know I don’t need to, but I want to. I mean it though, you are the most gorgeous soul I have ever laid eyes on and somehow you always manage to look better. I don’t know how you do it. Just when I think I’ve seen the peak of your beauty I see you again.” I smiled, “There’s that smile again.”

I sighed and said, “Oh Nicky.”

“What?” he asked innocently giving me a sheepish grin.

“Well what are we going to do stand out here all day, go inside or go somewhere?” I asked him.

“How about we do two and three?”

“Sounds good to me.” Then we walked into my room. And while he went to sit on my bed I put the flowers away. Then I turned around walked toward him and asked him, “Carnations, how d’ya know? They really are beautiful Nicky.” I stopped in front of him and said, “Thank you I love them.”

“And I love you,” he said pulling me toward him, wrapping his big strong arms around my waist. Then he gave me a kiss that could only be given by pure love.

After our kiss I sat on his lap, “Nick, you are my angel,” I said looking him in the eyes. “I know you always call me angel but truly darling you’re the angel because without you, my life was so empty and only by your love, the love of an angel, had it become full.”

“Well then, maybe we’re just two misplaced angels sent to earth to be put in the conquest of finding each other. Oh and yes of course remember they had to send you here so that chaos wouldn’t break out because of that out of this world voice of yours.”

“Silly Nicky,” I said tapping him on the nose, “Well now that we have found each other, what do we do now?”

“Live life and be happy together.”

“Sounds like a plan to me,” I said resting my head on his shoulder, then I said, “Speaking of plans are we leaving my room or staying here? Honestly,” I said picking my head up and giving him a kiss on the cheek, “it doesn’t matter to me either way.”

“Well in that case...” he pretended to think for a while and then he said, “Well I would like to stay here, but I have something planned that I hope will make you never forget this day.”

In a dazed voice I said, “Too late, it’s already been the most amazing day of my life,” and I truly meant it. I never had it so good.

“Well it’s about to get better, let’s go my lady love,” he whispered into my ear. So I got up and he followed suit. Taking my hand in his we walked out the door. I locked up and off we went.

We got in the car and then I asked him, “So where are you taking me on this wonderful day of mine?”

“Well first we’re going to go have dinner and then I have something very interesting planned for afterwards.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes really, Miss Pretty,” he said giving me a quick glance and grin before returning to the road.

“Miss Pretty? Nicky are you having fun coming up with new names for me?”

“Yeah, I am actually. Okay we’re here now.”

First I thought, That was fast. Then I looked around and asked confused, “Where’s here?”

“The Blue Dream,” he stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I mean in a way it was obvious because the sign was flashing. But...

“The Blue Dream?” I asked very confused. I’d never heard of it before. How could Nick know about it?

“Yes The Blue Dream. I hear it’s got great food,” then he said very mysteriously, “and other things.”

“What other things,” I asked suspiciously.

“You’ll see, let’s go, babe.” So he got out went around, opened my side of the door and helped me out.

“Ooo, I can’t wait to see what you have planned for me now,” I said excitedly.

“It’s definitely going to be something different,” then he added, “I hope.”

“Everything’s different with you,” I replied, just as we walked into the restaurant. It was a dimly lit place that had a jazzy aura about it. It looked like a very romantic place to be. “Oh wow, Nick, this place is amazing.”

“I know, I did a little research for today and I thought that you might like this place.”

“I do it’s great,” I said turning to face him smiling.

“The look on your face says it all, and look it matches your dress,” he replied smiling at me. He was right it kind of did. I was wearing this fuchsia dress with blackish spots on it. It went well with the bluish back lit color of the restaurant. Then we kept walking and he said to the host, “Hi, I have a reservation for two under Lachey.”

“Oh yes, right this way sir.” Then he seated us.

Before the host left Nick whispered something, I didn’t get to hear it all but what I did hear sounded really suspicious. When the host left Nick turned his attention back to me and said, “So what do you think of this day so far?”

“Still unbelievable.”

“Good, I’m glad and I hope that the rest of the night continues to be unbelievable.”

“Nick what do you have planned?” I asked suspiciously, giving him the eye.

“You’ll see. Now what do you want to eat?”

I opened up the menu and started looking through it. Everything looked so good but I finally said, “I’ll take the chicken parmesan.”

“Mmm, sounds good, I think I’ll have that too,” then right on cue the waiter came to take our order. “Two chicken parmesan please and some sparkling cider too.”

“Right away sir,” the waiter replied, “Would you like some bread sticks while you wait?”

“Yes please,” Nick answered.

“Very well, sir. I will be back with your beverage shortly and here are your bread sticks,” he said putting down the basket he had in his arms. Then the waiter quickly went away.

Then Nick turned back to me and said, “You know I hear that the singer here is supposed to be pretty good but I bet she’s not half as good as you are.”

“What are you trying to hint at now, Lachey?” I asked picking up a bread stick and picking at it.

“Nothing, just that you have the best darn voice I have ever heard. Did you know that when we have children they will have the best talent out there?” he said nonchalantly as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Then he picked up a bread stick too.

I put mine down, swallowed the bite I had in my mouth and looked at him asking a little surprised, “Whoa, you're thinking about us having children already?”

“Of course, haven’t you?” he asked surprised as well. Then he continued eating his bread stick.

“Nicky,” I said putting my hands on the table, “I’m still trying to fathom the fact that we’re together. I mean I’ve dreamt about everything, you know us being married, having children, living in a big home, being happy together, but honestly darling all this still seems like nothing more than a dream.” By the end he had finished eating his bread stick.

Then he took my hands in his looked me in the eyes and said, “I get it baby, you try to realize it’s not just a dream and I’ll work on our future. Whatever it takes to make you realize I’m here forever is all that matters. I still sometimes wonder if you’re not still a dream too, but I like thinking about the other things more because then it means you’re real.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Thank you Nicky, I love how understanding you are,” I said lifting his hands and kissing them.

“Anything for my angel,” he said doing the same thing to me. Then he looked away turning his head to the side and said, “Look the singer’s coming on.”

She started singing something unrecognizable but it was very pretty. And she was very good at what she was doing. The waiter came by and gave us our sparkling cider. He served it to us and I sat there listening to her. I thought she was very good and then I said, “Nicky your wrong.”

“How dare you say that to me beautiful. What could I possibly be wrong about?”

“The singer, she’s not bad.”

“That’s not what I said, I said that you would be better than her and honey, she might be good, but once again I was right.”

“And how many people my darling would agree with you?”

“I don’t know,” then he mumbled something incoherently. I didn’t bother to ask what he had just said because I was afraid of what he might have to say aside from the fact that I knew he wouldn’t tell me anyway. “So have you written anything lately?” he asked me after a while.

But before I could answer him the waiter showed up with our food and put it down asking us, “Is there anything else I could get you sir, miss?”

“No, that’s good,” I answered.

“Very well, just call me over when you guys need anything okay?”

“Thanks,” I replied before he went away. I looked at the food, “Ooo, this looks good,” I said as I started to put my fork in the food.


* * * * *


Ever since I saw the movie Mr. Deeds I’d wanted to have a plate of chicken parmesan. The first time I ever saw that movie was the first time I ever spent so much time with a guy. But of course it was just another night for me to spend time with a friend. A friend I had a crush on however. But as time went on I lost interest. Then he just became a good friend. But I remembered that crush well. That night was such an exciting night for me. We talked for so long. He walked me home and stayed for about another hour or so and didn’t go home ‘til some time after midnight. It was pretty unexpected. That too felt like a dream. But once we started spending more time together after that day I realized it wasn’t. So what I didn’t get was why was Nick still like a dream to me? I guess it had to do with the fact that Nick had been a dream for so long it was hard to see the reality of it, especially since he turned out to actually be like everything I ever imagined him to be and so much more.


* * * * *


“I agree,” Nick said. And he started to eat his too. He seemed to have forgotten his question to me. So we sat there eating and listening to the singer. She was incredible. I couldn’t believe that she was only singing in restaurants like that. I wondered why she hadn’t made it yet. Maybe she wasn’t trying. I made it a point to remember to try and see if I could talk to her before we left. It would’ve been an awesome present. She sang a couple of songs and then someone else came on. What’s the deal? I thought. This singer was even better than the last. I saw the previous singer sit down at one of the tables. Something was definitely starting to look suspicious.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 19~


“So how’s your food angel?” Nick asked me.

I swallowed and said, “It’s great, how’s yours?”

“Wonderful,” he answered with a smile.

“Nicky?” I said in a questioning tone.

“Yes baby,” he answered still smiling.

“Do you know what’s going on with all of these changing singers?”

His smile broadened as he said, “Maybe.”

“Oh Nicky, what’s going on?”

“I’m not sure I should tell you yet.”

“So I’m guessing the ‘yet’ means I get to find out later when you feel that it’ll be best to tell me right?”

“You are good.”

“Thank you Nicky, but I’m afraid later just won’t do.”

“Oh come on honey, play along.”

“All right I’m gonna finish my food now, but I expect to be told soon.”

“Don’t worry baby, you’ll find out before we leave.”

“Ha ha, I meant earlier than that.”

“Of course darling,” he said with a smirk. So we continued to eat our food. It was very good indeed. And the singers were all amazing. I just wish I knew what was going on with all of the changes and why the women kept sitting down. By the end of it all I lost track of all of the singing women. And so much for getting to meet the first woman she left before I even realized it. So did many of the others. Most of the women following the first only did one song apiece which was why there were so many. It was really making me wonder about what my loved one had up his sleeve. I had a sneaking suspicion and I was soon to find that my suspicions were very close to reality.

When we finished our food the waiter came to pick up our plates and said, “I’ll be right back with the dessert.”

“But...” I called after him. Then I turned to Nick and said, “Okay now what?”

“What?” he asked oh so innocently.

“We didn’t order anything yet,” I simply stated, as if it weren’t already obvious.

“I know, but they already know what to get.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes.”

“Why is that?”

“You’ll see,” he said giving me a sly little grin.

And then four people came out singing me birthday wishes so that the whole restaurant could hear that it was my birthday and an announcement was made. “Ladies and gentlemen a warm birthday wish is given to the guest of honor tonight a Miss Jennifer sitting right at that table over there,” he said pointing at us. “It happens to be her nineteenth birthday and her first birthday sharing it with the man over there. Congratulations, to that lovely couple.”

My face went beet red. I couldn’t believe what he had done. The cake was so small and so cute with two candles “1” and “9” and my name in the center. I looked at Nick to see him gleaming at me. Then I looked around to see that everyone in the restaurant was staring at us. I was so embarrassed, surprised and still mystified by the magic that was Nick. How could he be so sweet and in my life? Something just wasn’t right, or was it? “Nick,” I finally managed to say, “You did all this for me?”

“Of course, you deserve it angel,” he scooted his chair next to mine and whispered in my ear, “you’re perfect.” Then he tilted my head up and he gave me a kiss. We suddenly heard this great big applause from the rest of the people and I pulled apart from him feeling a little more embarrassed at the fact that we were being watched.

Then I heard another announcement being made. “And now we were wondering if the lovely birthday girl would grace us with a song.”

I looked up at Nick and suddenly I realized that what I thought might have been going on was and I suddenly knew what he was up to the whole time, he was trying to weasel a song out of me to sing there. I started to speak, “Nick, did you...”

“Well all right, I guess it’s time to confess. I knew that they were having open mike night for singers today or something like that, most of the singers are really more prearranged auditioning or just signing up and I was hoping that since today was your birthday they wouldn’t have to hear you first because I knew you wouldn’t and well...”

“So you signed me up without asking first?” I asked a little bit mad and very confused.

“Well yeah. Listen, honey, you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but think about it. You get to perform and you never have to see these people again and if you still actually think you sound as bad as you say you do and you find that the people agree with you I’ll leave you alone about the whole going professional thing,” he said it all so fast I thought my head was going to spin.

But before I could answer I heard the guy speak again, “So how about it Jennifer are you willing to come up and sing for us?”

I turned my head to look at the guy on the stage and then I looked back at Nick and said, “But I don’t have anything to sing.” I felt my body calm down and my anger subside. I shouldn’t have expected anything else from Nick anyway. I knew that he was a pretty determined guy.

“Sing whatever comes to you,” he prodded.

“But don’t I need accompaniment?” I asked hoping it would stop him.

I should’ve known better, “Sing it a cappella then, you don’t need accompaniment. Your background can be the angel’s harp.”

“Will you give it up with the angel stuff already?” I said trying to contain my laughter. I couldn’t help it, Nick just had this way of making me feel giddy all the time. I could never be mad at him for long.

“Never.”

I couldn’t help but break into a smile at the way he said it, “All right you know what, I’m going to prove you wrong. I’ll go up there and sing something and prove to you that you are the only one who thinks that the angels would ever be jealous of my voice. Nicky, I’m definitely not that good.” So I got up and started walking to the stage. The crowd started applauding. I took a deep breath, Okay Jenn you can do this. I put my hand on the microphone. Wow, haven’t done this in a while, I continued to ramble in my mind. Then I said, “Good evening ladies and gentlemen, well I don’t know what they’ve been telling you but I will apologize if I don’t live up to the standards they seem to have made for me.” Then I took another deep breath before I said, “I will sing ‘I Believe In You and Me’ from The Preacher’s Wife.”

Then before I started I looked at Nick and he smiled. I seemed to find more strength just glancing at him. He was my rock, the one to keep me steady in times of trouble. He’d certainly proven that more than once to me. Then with one final deep, calming, relaxing breath, I closed my eyes and began the song. I could just hear the crowd gasp and I stopped hearing forks moving, the whole place became so silent you could definitely hear a pin drop if one were to fall, but it seemed as if everyone was making it a point not to make any noise. It was so nerve wrecking. I opened my eyes and placed all of my eye contact on the man who put me up to it. I wanted so much to make him proud of me. His smile calmed me down some more and the song suddenly became more heart felt as I realized how much the song really fit into my life. I did believe in Nick and me, more than anything. I finally believed that no matter what the obstacle, we would overcome it all.

When I finished, there was still nothing from the crowd. It was eerie. I was sure at least Mr. Wonderful would have done something. But he just sat there staring at me with what looked like surprise in his eyes. Imagine how I must’ve felt about that. Maybe I finally proved him wrong.

Then suddenly there was this burst of applause that made me want to jump out of my skin. To me what felt like an eternity only lasted for about four seconds. Life really does seem to go in slow motion when things that matter the most to you are involved.

Then I felt two hands on my arms as a guy said, “Wasn’t that amazing folks, wow. And you just turned nineteen today?” he asked turning to me.

“Uh...yes I did.”

“Incredible. I swear I heard the angels humming in the background.”

“Um...thank you.” I was beginning to think Nick was a part of some conspiracy against me. “I think I’m gonna go take my seat now.” I started to walk off the stage.

“Remember that voice and that face everybody I’m sure she’s gonna be big. If we’re lucky maybe she’ll do some more singin’ for us later.”

By then I had made it back to my table and had sat down. “See baby, I told you, you were incredible. And once again you’ve amazed me beyond belief.”

“Nicky, you’re exaggerating again.”

“No I’m not.”

And just as I was about to protest someone walked over to our table and said, “Excuse me miss, but I just came over here to tell you that, that was amazing. I’ve never heard that song before and now you’ve inspired me to want to hear what the song really sounds like but I bet the original artist couldn’t match your performance.”

“Oh thank you,” I started to blush as I was about to tell him who the original artist was, “but you might want to know that the original artist happens to be Whitney Houston, at least to my knowledge.”

He gave a sheepish look and said, “Well, I still think that you're probably better at it. Do you think I could get your autograph?”

The boy obviously had never heard Whitney Houston sing before, “Oh my, um... are you sure about that?” I asked uncertainly.

[Baby_Girl89]

“Oh, I’m very sure unless...”

“It’s not that I don’t want to give it to you it’s just that I don’t think it’ll be very useful to you.”

“Oh please, give me something to remember you by.”

I gave out a little sigh of laughter as I said, “All right, do you have something for me to sign?”

He picked up a napkin and said, “How about this?”

“This is fine, do you have a pen?” He took one out of his pocket and handed it to me. “So what should I write? I’ve never done this before,” as I said that I eyed Nick, hoping he would say something, but he just had an amused look on his face.

“Just make it out to Eric and write whatever you want on it.”

“Oh, okay.” So as I wrote I said, “To Eric, thank you for your enthusiasm. It was nice to meet you here at The Blue Dream. As always, Jennifer.” Then as an after thought I wrote ‘Isabel.’ I handed him the napkin and said, “In case I ever do become famous I put down my stage name too.”

“Isabel,” he said quietly. Then he said, “Cool,” with an excited look on his face. He gave me back the napkin and said, “Would you mind writing down the date on the napkin?”

“No problem,” so I took his pen and wrote down the date and then in a surge of spontaneity I kissed his napkin handed it back to a stunned face and gave him back his pen. “It was nice meeting you Eric. Thank you.” I half expected him to keel over from excitement. I also expected Nick to say something, but instead in the corner of my eye I could see him trying not to keel over from laughter.

“Wow, no, thank you. This is the greatest day of my life. Do you think you’ll be singing again?”

“I don’t know,” I looked at his table and saw a woman waiting for him. “Who’s that at your table?”

“Oh that’s my girlfriend. She thought you were awesome too. Do you think...”

But before he could finish his sentence the host came over and said, “Excuse me miss, but is this man bothering you?”

“Oh, no it’s perfectly all right, he just came to ask some questions that’s all.”

“All right. Um...miss some of the people were wondering if you would be giving encore performances. We would be willing to make your meal on the house if you did.”

“Oh, well I’ll keep that in mind, thank you.”

“Oh and miss, there are people wondering if they could meet with you before you leave for the evening.”

I let out an embarrassed sigh of laughter, as I said, “Thank you, for the information, but I’m not sure yet.”

“No problem and a wonderful performance miss.”

“I told ya so,” Nick whispered in my ear.

I just turned back to Eric and said, “I’m sorry Eric what was it you wanted to ask me?”

“I just wanted to know if you would be willing to sign another napkin,” he paused and then quickly added, “for my girlfriend Anita,” as if to tell me that he wasn’t a nut for wanting two signed napkins.

“Oh no problem.” So I signed one for her too, handed the napkin and his pen to him and said, “Bye.”

“Thank you so much,” he said and then he walked back to the table. I saw his girlfriend give him a smile. Thank goodness she didn’t look angry at him. In fact she gave him a kiss. They both looked happy. They reminded me of another happy couple I knew.

I turned to look at Nick and smiled at him, “Well,” I said.

“Mmm, well I won,” he answered. “I guess this means I don’t have to stop bugging you after all. In fact it looks like you already have a fan base,” he continued lowering his head to put his nose on mine.

I moved my head up to kiss him. Then I said, “Nicky, you did something, I know you did. You put these people up to it didn’t you?”

“What?” he said lifting his head up. “Why are you always so suspicious? How was I supposed to know who was supposed to be here tonight?”

“I don’t know, I’m sure you have your ways. You know it would be different if you didn’t have money, well connections anyway.”

“Hey, I do too have money,”

“Oh so you admit you paid these people to be acting like this.”

“That’s not what I said, stop twisting my words around, woman,” he said sounding more frustrated than he looked.

Giving him a grin and buddying up to him even more I said, “Oh but why, it’s so much fun.”

“You’re adorable when you act like this you know that angel,” he said returning my grin and clearly forgetting about his frustration from just moments ago.

“Act like what Nicky?” I asked ever so innocently.

“Oh...” he said frustratedly with a smile on his face. Then he pulled me in for a kiss. “So what do you think about your night now?”

“Honestly, Nicky, I don’t know what to think anymore. I mean I still think that this is definitely different, but springing the whole singing thing on me that was a little sneaky, but then again what else could I expect from you anyway?”

“You have a point there, what else could you expect from me?”

I put my head on his shoulder and said, “Well Nicky, I guess there’s only one way for me to still see this night.”

“And how’s that darling?” he asked kissing the top of my head.

“Absolutely unforgettable,” I muttered just loudly enough for him to hear me.

I felt the tip of his lips on my ear as he said, “Absolutely fantastic.”

I picked my head up off his shoulder looked him in the eyes and said, “Nicky you are fantastic. I love you and thank you so much for making this the best birthday ever.”

“Nothing’s too good for the love of my life.” I just smiled at him. “So how about we actually start eating this cake of yours?” he said eyeing the cake.

“Good idea. What kind is it?” I asked.

“Marble. I figured it was a good mixture for you and me if you know what I mean,” he said giving me a wink.

I was assuming he meant our skin colors. As an Asian who spends quite a bit of time in the sun my skin became a pretty dark color which hasn’t gone away since the time I first started changing color. But then again Nicholas wasn’t exactly Mr. Vanilla but of course that must have been part of his implication of his ancestral background. He’s such a kook.

[Baby_Girl89]

He picked up the fork put it into his piece of the cake and took a bit, but instead of putting into his mouth he aimed for mine. I took it and I must admit I’d had my fair share of marble cake in my life and that was marvelous. “This is fantastic!” I exclaimed perhaps more surprised than I should’ve been.

“Really, let me try some,” he said so I fed him some and he seemed to agree. But then he said, “I was actually hoping to find out how it tasted another way, but that worked too.”

“Nicky, I don’t even want to know.”

“You know you do,” he said smiling at me, “you know you do.”

“No I really don’t,” I said returning his smile. While we were having our little conversation my head was trying to come up with new ways to show Nick how much I really did love him. He never went back to the question he had asked before we actually started eating dinner. I never got to answer him, but I thought of a way I could. “Nicky, I think I’m going to give an encore.”

“Really, what are you gonna sing?”

“You’ll see. Just watch me okay?”

“Like I would be watching anything else,” then he waved the host over.

He came right over, “Yes, sir what can I do for you?”

“My wondrous lady here would like to do an encore performance.”

“Wonderful. Please come with me.”

So he walked me to the side of the stage and we waited for the current performer to finish. I whispered to him, “Wow you guys seem to get a lot of willing performers.”

“Yeah, everyone’s hoping to get discovered.”

“What?” I asked quite bewildered.

“Well every once in a while on our open mike nights we get some music producers here and sometimes people get lucky enough to get discovered.”

“Huh,” I sighed, “Well I don’t really think I should follow that,” I said as the girl before me finished up her song.

“Are you kidding me? She should be lucky that she’s going before you.”

“Well see, I’m planning on doing an original and I don’t want to be booed off the stage.”

“With your voice you’ll have nothing to worry about. Now I need to get up there and announce you.” So he walked up on stage as I heard him say, “Now for your encore enjoyment Jennifer singing an original.” Then he turned to me and waved his hand to have me come on stage.

I walked up and tried to compose myself as I walked. I kept feeling like I was going to trip. I wore a smile on my face hoping it would calm me. It did a little then I got to the microphone. I faced the crowd and spoke, “Thank you for the introduction. Well yes I am doing an original. I wrote this for the man at my table to show him how much I love him.” I looked at him and saw him raise an eyebrow sort of out of surprise. “I hope you like it baby,” I said to him. He smiled and mouthed, “I love you.” I started my song, surprised I actually remembered it.

”I was lost without you
Empty without your love
I never knew which way to turn
And then you came along

Life is now a lullaby
Life is now a living dream
The sun shines everyday
As long as I know you are mine”

And I just kept going, until the song was over, watching Nick every second of the song. His eyes looked like they kept getting wider with each passing second. And finally the song was over. This was the moment I’d been waiting for. And suddenly applause was sounding around me but as I was looking at Nick, he wasn’t even moving. And then I saw a tear fall down his cheek. I said, “Thank you,”into the mike and walked off.

The host went back onto the stage and said, “That was even better than the last song.”

I walked back to my table and before I even got a chance to sit down Nick pulled me in for one hell of a kiss. Then when we parted, even though I was a bit winded from the amazing kiss, I said, “So what did you think of the song?”

“What else could I think angel? It was amazing. Is that new?”

“Yes, written just a little while back for you.”

“Thank you. I don’t know how you do it baby. It’s your birthday and yet you managed to give me a gift. Whatever it was I did to get you in my life I sure am glad I did it. I love you.”

“I love you too Nicky. Why don’t we finish up here and spend the rest of the evening alone?” I said giving him a wink.

“Yes, let’s.” So we continued feeding each other the cake and the host promptly came over with a waiter in tow to take the empty plates away.

“As we said earlier the meal is now on the house for that stunning performance you gave us.”

“Oh thank you.” I turned to look at Nick and said, “I totally forgot about that.”

“I did too, I was just about to pay them. Well now I can leave a larger tip.”

I turned back to the host because he hadn’t budged yet. “Is there anything else I should know?”

“Yes, there are quite a few people who would still like to see you miss. Would it be all right for you to meet with them now that you are through with your meal?”

“I uh...” I turned to look at Nick hoping that he could help to give me an answer but he looked as confused as I felt. Then I said, “Well how many people want to see me?”

“That’s hard to answer, but if you would like to see them they are waiting in the lobby to talk to you.”

“Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind.” Seeing that he still didn’t seem to want to leave and seeing how Nick and I were about to go I said, “You know what, my boyfriend and I were just about to go why don’t you tell the people in the lobby that I’ll be right there. However I’m afraid that we won’t be staying for much longer.”

“Thank you miss,” he answered and then he scuttled away.

“Jeez Louise baby, these people must really want to meet you.”

“Do I even want to know what’s going to happen?”

“I hope you’re ready for more bombarding.”

“So much for spending some time alone,” I said a little disappointed.

“Don’t worry baby, I’ll make sure we still have some us time.”

I smiled at him as I said, “You’re the best.”

“I’m just doin’ my job. Besides I must admit I want to do it more out of selfishness to keep you to myself for awhile. We better get goin’ your fans are waiting.”

“Very funny Lachey.” We got up and started walking toward the lobby. When we got there we saw a lot of people waiting for something. Then someone saw me and walked over to me asking me to sign something and then the others were doing the same thing. Then the host came by and told them to all get in line to do what they wanted. Talk about an unexpected surprise. When I finally got done with the last signature another twenty minutes later one more person decided to have a word with me.

“Excuse me miss, I’m Peter Watson executive producer of a little music company that’s just starting out and I think that you are exactly the type of talent that we have been searching for. You were amazing tonight. And that song you wrote, well I haven’t heard anything like that in ages. You have talent missy and I think you can make it big. I could already tell by the way everyone was lined up for an autograph how big you’ll be. So what do ya say? Can my company and I sign you?”

“Well, Mr. Watson, I’m very flattered and honored that you think that I would be able to make it to the big leagues but I’m afraid that I’m just not ready to go there yet.”

“Well here’s my card anyhow, promise to call if you change your mind?”

I took his card from him, “Well Mr. Watson if I do change my mind I promise you’ll be one of the firsts to know?” I could only hope that I would keep that promise.

“Thanks.”

“No problem,” I said and then he walked out of the restaurant.

“You aren’t planning on calling him, are you?” Nick asked me suspiciously.

“Not really.”

“But why, baby, isn’t this what you were talking about, making it without my help.”

“Was that your plan?”

“No I just wanted you to have a good birthday.”

“Well then darling rest easy in knowing that I had a very good birthday today.”

“Good, but the night’s still not over yet. Come on, it’s my turn to have you all to myself.” And we started walking back to his car.

Once we got in I asked, “Where are we going?”

“Wait and see honey,” he told me.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 20~


He drove for a while and we sat in silence. He carried a smile on his face the whole way there. He whistled a few times to fill the silence every once in a while. I sat there trying to comprehend everything that had happened to me over the past few hours of my life. It was taking a while for things to sink in. Finally we arrived at our destination, the park. “Nicky, what are we doing here?” I asked him bewilderedly.

“Well I thought that this would be a nice place to give you our alone time.”

“The park, well it certainly would give us quite a bit of alone time wouldn’t it? Especially considering it’s a Tuesday night.”

“And as a special treat it’s a full moon. Come on.” He got out of the car and helped me out. Then he led me through the park like he knew exactly what he was doing. When we finally stopped we ended up in a clearing, where the moon was very bright and very clear. There were trees encircling us yet there weren’t any inside the circle. It was so beautiful. I’d never seen that part of the park before. Heck I’d never seen much of the park to begin with, but the beauty of it just took my breath away.

I finally tore my eyes away from it and looked up at the figure standing beside me, “Nicky, this is incredible. How did you...” tears started to fill my eyes.

“Well I’ve been taking these last couple of days to do some research on some things for today. But this place I discovered during that one lonely week at the beginning of our relationship. I’ve been coming here to think while you were in class lately and I thought that it was time to show you my little secret and now I hope it can be our little secret.”

I hugged him, “Oh Nicky, it’s amazing thank you so much, for everything, I couldn’t have asked for a better present today.”

“Do you mean it?”

“Yes I do,” I said smiling at him.

“Well there’s still one more thing I want to give you.”

“What else could you possibly give me to top all this off?”

“You’ll see, wait here.” And he started running toward a tree. I saw him reach his hand inside one of the hollow trees and he pulled something out. Then he came running back to me. He said, “Okay, I have one last tangible gift to give you to help you remember this day.”

“Nicky, this day has been etched in my mind for all eternity, I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”

“Well I hope that this will make it easier for you. I want you to think about this day every time you see it and hopefully it will also help you think of me.”

“Nick, don’t you think I think about you enough already?” I said, half-jokingly.

“Trust me babe, it’s probably not as much as I do.”

“Okay now give it to me,” I said anxiously. I wanted to know what was so amazing that could make the night any better than it already was.

“Oh wait I forgot, I’ll be right back,” and he took off again toward a different hollow tree and extracted a blanket from it. Then he came back and laid it out. “Okay sit down baby.”

“All right,” so I sat. Then he sat down next to me. I looked him in the eyes and said anxiously once again, “Now would you give it to me already or are you planning on teasing me all night?”

“You know you’re really sexy when you want something.”

“Stop playing around and give it to me already Nicky, I’m about to have stroke from curiosity and you know what they say.”

“What’s that?”

“Curiosity killed the cat.”

“Lucky for me you’re human.”

“Funny,” I said giving a slight giggle. Then he cupped my face in his hands and he kissed me again. The whole night was starting to remind me of my song again.

Then he took my hand in his and put the present in my hand. I unwrapped it and found another velvety jewelry box in my hand. I opened it and found a little key and two little hearts. “Read them,” he said.

I picked up one of the hearts, it was attached to the key, “JFN & NSL 4ever” I read, “Oh Nicky.”

Then he took them in his hands and said, “I’ll wear this heart and you wear the key, look at the key babe.”

I looked at it, it had his name on it and then,”You hold the key to my heart” engraved on it. “I love it,” I said in awe of how romantic he was.

“I’m glad, and the other heart says the same thing as the one I have except that is doesn’t have the little lock hole.”

“Nicky, I...you always know how to surprise me.”

“And it’s never gonna stop angel,” he said holding me.

“I hope not,” and I broke out into song again. I started singing “When I Fall In Love” Nick just sat there humming in the background.

When I finished, he said, “Stand up baby I want to dance.”

“Nicky’s there’s no music.”

“There will be.”

“Okay,” so I stood up. Then he stood up too and took my hands and led them to his neck. Then he put his arms around my waist. He looked at me and smiled a wide dazzling smile showing me his pearly whites.

“Okay, baby sing it again.”

“Nicky I...”

He gave me his puppy dog eyes and said, “Please, I wanna do something.”

How could I resist? “All right baby, it’s the least I could do I suppose.” So I started singing it again and then before I knew it he was joining me. I was glad I gave in because we sounded so good together. I couldn’t believe how well we worked together. I’d never heard two voices mix so well before, too bad we were the only ones there to hear it. It was just as well, it was something to definitely cherish. I hugged him close in our dance still singing. And I could hear him right in my ear singing along.

When the song ended, he pulled me away just far enough to look me in the eyes, then he said, “See baby we make beautiful music together in more ways than one.”

“Nicky, not this again,” I said pulling apart from him. “Don’t start with me again.” I started to walk away from him. I could only hope that it wouldn’t take a turn for the worst.

He started to come after me, “Baby, I just want you to see how well we sing together. We could take the world by storm, like Sonny and Cher.”

I turned to look at him, “What, and become known as Nick and Jenn?”

“Well why not?” he asked smiling.

I wasn’t going to give into the smile this time, I guess I was just too much of an individual to let it be, “Because Nicky, as much as I love you I don’t want to be tied to you in that way. I want to be my own woman and what if something happens to us, I don’t think I could take people still associating me with you like that.”

Looking me in the eyes with his hands on my shoulders he asked sounding a little scared, “You think something’s going to happen to us?”

Talk about changing the subject. “No, baby, I said ‘what if’,” I think I heard a huge sigh from him signaling that he relaxed, and his touch was still as gentle as ever. “I don’t really think something’s going to happen but no one knows what the future holds for two people but the future. I mean even marriages can end in divorce. Nothing is permanent anymore and it scares me. I...I...I just want to live in the now baby,” I said getting all choked up thinking about what could happen in the future. It really did scare me.

The look in his eyes changed from fear to a sympathetic compassion, “Baby, I’ve upset you. I’m so sorry,” he said pulling me into a hug, “what kind of a boyfriend upsets his girlfriend on her birthday, what an idiot I am.”

I pulled him away just enough to give him a weak smile as I said, “No, no Nicky, it’s okay baby, don’t worry about it, it’s just that you’ve been trying to get me to do this whole singing thing for awhile now and I know that you truly believe that I should try but it’s just that there are some things I need to work out before I can even begin to think about putting myself out there.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“I understand baby, okay I’ll tell you what, I promise not to be too much of a pain about it. I mean really I’m only doing this for my own selfish reasons anyway.”

“Oh really, and what reasons might those be Lachey?” I asked smiling for real now.

He smiled back and replied, “I wanted you to make a CD so that I could stop being such a dork by calling your phone all the time just to hear your answering machine pick up,” then he pulled me into a tight warm hold again.

“Aw, but Nicky I think it’s cute,” I said as I put my head on his chest. Then I added, “Besides I don’t have to become professional for you to have a CD of me singing.”

“No I guess not, but if I get you in the studio I figure I might as well make you professional.”

“You’re gripping at straws now Nicky.” I looked up at him, “Come on let’s finish this night without a fight.”

“What fight, it’s just a quiet lover’s quarrel,” he said whispering into my ear.

“A lover’s quarrel, who talks like that?”

“Well I do my lady love. I say a lot of things that other people wouldn’t.”

“I’ve realized that Nicky, I guess it’s another indication to me that you are the one for me because honestly I think you’re the only one who could match my crazy talk and stand my own idiocy.”

“There is not an idiotic bone in that beautiful body of yours.”

“Thank you baby, but I beg to differ. I’ve done quite a few stupid things in my life.”

“Well we learn from our mistakes.”

“You got that right baby,” I said continuing to bask in the warmth of his hold. Then after a little while I realized that it was starting to get late, “I hate to say this honey but it’s starting to get really late and I’ve got to get some sleep for class tomorrow. Luckily for me it doesn’t start until nine.”

He checked his watch and realized that I was right, “Oh wow, I hadn’t realized that it was. The time just seems to fly by when I’m with you. All right I suppose I should probably get you home now.”

“Yeah you probably should.” So we walked back to the blanket we were on earlier and picked it up from the ground and then we walked it back to the hollow tree that he got it from. Then we started to head for his car. “Nicky I had a wonderful time tonight.”

“Me too angel.”

“I’m sorry it has to end. It was so beautiful in that place. I’m really glad you showed it to me. I’d never seen the moon and the stars so beautifully before tonight.”

“Well I’m happy that you liked it. But as beautiful as it was there it will never compare to you.”

I squeezed his hand and said, “Thank you, Nicky. You really know how to make a girl feel special.”

“No one deserves it more than you do,” he said smiling dazzlingly at me. Then we reached his car. He opened the door and said, “Here you go my beautiful lady.”

“Why thank you my wonderful gentleman,” I said before I got in. Then he shut the door behind me, went around, and got in. He started the car and we were off. “Nicky?”

“Yeah babe.”

“Do you ever wonder what would’ve happened if you had gotten married?”

“Sometimes, but let’s not talk about that today.”

“Sorry, I don’t know what came over me, it’s just that sometimes I feel like it’s my fault that you’re still not married.”

“I hate to break it to you beautiful, but you kind of are the reason I’m not married. But listen, it doesn’t matter because when the time comes for me to be married at least then I’ll know I married the right one,” he said glancing at me and smiling so sincerely my heart melted.

“Really?” I asked as he was turning his attention back to the road.

“Really,” he stated.

I let out a sigh of relief as I let him drive without anymore interruptions from the peanut gallery. I thought about what he said. Did he really believe that I was the right one? I couldn’t help but remember some of the dreams that I used to have about him being married and having a child, a daughter to be exact, by the name of Tiffany. It seemed that my mind had created all the details thinking that I needed to know them so that when they happened I would be prepared. But they didn’t happen so why was I still worrying about them?

When we finally arrived back on campus in the parking lot I heard Nick say, “Honey, we’re here.”

Snapping out of my thoughts I said, “Huh?”

“I said, we’re here.”

“Oh,” I replied.

“Where did you go?”

“What are you talking about silly, I’m right here?”

“Well I know that honey, but it looked like your thoughts were carrying you a million miles away. What were you thinking about?”

“Things,” I said nonchalantly, trying to make it sound like it was no big deal.

“What things?” he asked a little too concerned. Did I look that bad?

“Just things honey, nothing to worry about. Nicky listen to me, if this relationship is going to work you can’t be worried about everything every fifteen seconds, you’re just gonna have to believe that everything is fine if I don’t tell you something okay.”

“That doesn’t really work for me.”

“And why is that my love?”

“Because I have a tendency to worry about everything, especially when things concern you.”

I smiled at him, then I said, “Well you can’t spend the rest of your life being a worrywart you’re just going to have to loosen up a little. And I plan on helping you.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“Thought you would. Now let’s get going.” I got out of the car before he could get to my door and I started heading up.

He came up after me and said, “Excuse me, but I’m supposed to be a gentleman here.”

“Well darling, I think I’m going to have to show you that as much as I like having a gentleman around I don’t mind having just a man around.” He gave me a fake little frown. “A man who’s sweet, sensitive, passionate, funny, smart, kind, talented, adorable, handsome, and of course my personal favorite so damn sexy.” He started a smile with the first and of course naturally it grew wider with each word I gave.

“Well I do like the sound of that.”

“Thought you would.” We eventually reached the back door of the dorm and I had to take out my key to unlock it, which meant it was past eleven already. Jeez where does the time go? So I unlocked it and Nick and I went through. Holding hands we went up the stairs to the fourth floor and started walking toward my room. When we reached my door I had to find my keys again to unlock my door and I finally got to go into my room. Nick followed me in and I shut the door. Then I swung around pinned him to the door and gave him a kiss that he wouldn’t be forgetting anytime soon.

When I finally released him I looked at him and saw wide eyes staring back at me, unblinking. “Wow, what was that for?” he asked obviously surprised.

“For being the greatest guy I know, and as a thank you for making this a very special unforgettable birthday.”

“Wow, well I need to make sure that I start making all of our get-togethers unforgettable.”

“You already do,” *kiss* “This was just something really special considering I’ve never really had a birthday I’d liked before.”

“Well beautiful there’s many more to come.”

“I’m sure there are. And I can’t wait to make yours just as great.”

“As long as you are the woman by my side nothing can go wrong.”

“I love you Lachey.”

“And I love you Jenn.” With one last kiss I opened the door and let him out. I watched him walk away. It truly was a happy birthday after all.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 21~

For the next couple of months we continued in this fashion. I mean I thought that after my birthday everything would just go downhill, but Nick proved me wrong. He showed me that wonderful things can still happen even without the special occasions. He was still everything I hoped for and so much more. I was literally in heaven every day. So no matter how often I was with Nick I kept thinking that it was all a dream and that one day I was going to wake up and it would be all gone. So I lived in the moment as much as I could. I never really thought that my life could ever get that way. Nick spent quite a lot of that time still trying to convince me to do something with my music. He said that he wouldn’t bother if he knew that I didn’t have the passion for it, but he said that he could see it in my eyes. And I hated to admit it, but I did have a passion for it. But I was also scared, of so many things. As I’ve said before I didn’t want people to think that I was using him, if I made it I wanted to do it on my own, but here he was offering me something like that. I didn’t know what to think. He wouldn’t let it drop, so much for not being too much of a pain. And even if I decided to go out on my own with that small company from The Blue Dream I didn’t remember where I put the card. Anyway, that was probably the only problem we had in our relationship and if you ask me I think it was a pretty minor detail compared to all the wondrous things we did have together.

Eventually I started to get over my fears, my main one, aside from what others would think, was Jessica. I thought she could use it to her advantage but it eventually slipped my mind. So many months had passed that I thought I was just being a nut about it. Nick convinced me that I had nothing to worry about. I would be able to make it based on my own merits; he was just there for support and “protection” as he put it.

So as soon as summer came along we hit the recording studio. We hadn’t told anyone that we were together, I was just someone that Nick found “talented” and wanted to help out. He told them that he wanted to take me under his wings because he knew the trade pretty well and just wanted to help out.

I remember his words being, “Hey if Lance can do it, so can I.” I had to laugh at that.

At first we were in the studio to just cut a demo, we had to find a label that would take me first, and naturally the ones we tried all gave responses. Well that was more unnatural than natural, but since Nick was in the business they felt they needed to reply. And instead of sending it to just one label he sent them to as many as he could think of. He apparently wanted to start a war, “What can I say,” he said, “I want to prove to you that you’re going to be wanted.”

Within about a week of sending out the tapes we got a response from every label saying, guess what, “We want her.” Nick had his hands full trying to deal with them all. He asked for my input about which label I wanted to join, I was in too much shock to answer him at first. I still didn’t understand why all the labels wanted me. Then I thought, Well, maybe Nick had something to do with it. He didn’t, but it was a way for me to try and comprehend it. If you can’t tell already I don’t have very much confidence in myself and yet Nick still sticks around.

Anyway, like my dream, Nick was working on his second CD at the time and wanted me to do some songs with him for his CD. Since he was staying with Universal and I was working with him I just decided that Universal would be fine for me too, although I decided that I would be more involved about certain things, or things would never get done. They were very pleased with the idea and were willing to pay whatever price to keep me there. It definitely made no sense to me. I couldn’t blame it on my siren issue either because half of the people who had agreed to the match were female. So Nick and I came up with something for our first single together. It was fun working with him on the song. He was just so intense and passionate about it. It amazed me. But we were a good combination.

When we finished it, we presented it to the producers and they absolutely loved it. We worked with some of the musicians to come up with a good background sound and when the final product was produced it was incredible, to say the least. I did however have my doubts. I knew the music was good and the lyrics were good but I still wasn’t sure of how the public would react to a new-comer this way. I was so nervous about it all. After it was done I kept thinking, Maybe I should suggest another singer.

I eventually did one day; it was eating me up too much. About two days after the recording Nick and I had some quality alone time and I brought it up, “Nicky?”

“Yeah, babe?”

I hesitated a little and then said, “I have something I want to tell you.”

“What is it, baby?”

“I think that you should redo the song with someone else,” I blurted.

He looked at me shocked, “Are you kidding me?”

“No,” I said with a look of confusion on my face. I may have made the suggestion, but I wasn’t really sure how I felt about it.

“Why, honey?” he asked concerned.

“Because I think it would sound better. I think you might get more recognition for the song. I don’t want the song to be held back because of me. I mean it’s a great song and I think that more people would want to listen to it if they knew the person singing it.”

“Are you ashamed of me?” he asked.

“What, did I say that?” I asked bewildered. Where in the world would he get such an idea?

“No, but I just figured that maybe you didn’t want to have it out there with you and me singing it because you’re ashamed.”

“You’re nuts Nicky you know that?” I commented. “Baby, if I were ashamed of you I wouldn’t even be with you.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Somehow I don’t exactly believe that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked getting a little angry with him.

“I just mean that ...I don’t know what I mean,” he said confusing himself. Somehow I didn’t believe him.

“Nicky, I love you and I don’t want to be your fall, that’s why I’m suggesting this.”

“Jenn, you could never be my fall. If anything you’d probably help me rise. Besides, we wrote that song together to sing it together. Who cares what the world thinks? It’s all about you and me.”

“Really?” I asked with a smile on my face.

“Really,” he replied smiling back at me.

Hugging him I said, “I have the best boyfriend in the world. I’m the luckiest person on this planet.”

“I think you’ve got that backwards, I’m luckiest person on this planet and in the universe. I love you.”

“I love you too Nicky,” and we embraced in yet another one of our passionate kisses.


* * * * *


After about a week of the song being originally cut, it was finally released after the final touches were made. Nick had me completely convinced that there was no other way the song could be done. Aside from that he refused to even think about it, so naturally I had no choice but to leave the song the way it was. I was given a choice of whether or not I still wanted it released, but it wasn’t much of one, Nick gave me his puppy dog stare and I just couldn’t say no. Would you?

So the song was released. The first time I heard it on the radio, I couldn’t believe my ears. It was like a magical dream that could in no way be real. And yet it was. The greater thing about it was that Nick was with me the first time and we got to experience it together.

We were in his car listening to the radio when we heard the DJ announce, “And here’s a new one from Nick Lachey featuring new comer Isabel. It’s a great song. We know you’ll love it.” Then he played it. Even though I knew it was a great song as soon as I heard it again tears started streaming down my cheek.

“Nicky,” I said all choked up.

“What, baby? Is something wrong?”

“No, I just um...” I had to compose myself, “I just wanted to say thank you.”

“For what, honey?” he asked.

“For helping me see a dream come true,” then I added, “again,” as I smiled and reached one hand over to put on his free hand.

He gave me a quick grin before returning to the road and said, “That’s what I’m here for.”

When the song ended the DJ said, “Let’s take some calls. Hello, you’re on the air. What did you think about this song?”

“Hey, my name is Chris and I think it’s a great song. Who’s that girl again?”

“Her name is Isabel. Remember it well everybody, I have a feeling she’s going to be big. Right now she’s currently under Nick’s wings himself. I hear she’s working on an album, so watch for it everyone.”

“How did he know that?” I asked.

“I don’t know, I didn’t say anything.”

“Next caller, hello you’re on the air.”

“Hi, my name’s Elizabeth and I thought the song was beautiful. They really make a good team. I was almost in tears. When’s the single coming out in stores? I have to have that song.”

“Well it’s being released to the public this Tuesday.”

“Thanks.”

“No prob. Wow, this is starting to sound like yesterday when we first played the song.”

I turned off the radio then and said, “Nick, is this really happening?”

“Yep, get used to it baby, you’re gonna be a star.” I didn’t know how to respond to that.

The song continued to take off for the next couple of weeks. It was at the top of the charts continuously. Then Nick told me one day that he thought we should do a music video for it. I had to have known it was going to happen sooner or later, but I still wasn’t expecting it. Honestly, I wanted to do a video but I was really nervous about it. It was one thing for the people to like the song itself, but how would they feel about a video? Nick once again, being the wonderful boyfriend that he was, told me not to worry about it. He told me to just think of the video as a documentation of our love. Well when he put it that way, what could I say? My only other feelings about it was that it was going to be the first time that I got physical exposure, I was scared as well... you know. But then I thought, Well this is for Nick, I can do this for Nick. So I put aside my feelings of fear and did it for him.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 22~

The first day of the shoot was very nerve wrecking for me. It turned out Nick had signed us up to be in one of MTV’s Making the Video episodes. As if the music video itself weren’t going to be enough. Sure Nick had no problems with it; he’d made tons of videos before and was on episodes of Making the Video a couple of times as well. It was natural for him; I, on the other hand, hated the camera. But after we got started I forgot that there was even a camera there. And for moral support the rest of 98º showed up too. I finally had the chance to meet them. They were the only other non-family members to know about our relationship.

Drew was the first to say something, “Are you Isabel?”

“Yes, I am Drew; it’s nice to finally meet you,” I said shaking his hand.

“It’s nice to finally meet you too,” he said pulling me into a hug. “Nick talks about you all the time. I’m glad you’re real and not imaginary. We were beginning to think you were for a while there, and then we heard you sing. Although we have to tell you we all thought you were computer generated at first.”

“Thanks Drew, I think,” I said a little unsure of how I should’ve felt at that moment.

Then Jeff extended his hand and said, “I’m Jeff.”

“I know, it’s nice to finally meet you too,” then turning to Justin I said, “And you as well Justin. I was wondering if I was ever going to meet any of you.”

“Nick’s just afraid that he’s going to lose you to one of us,” Drew said, “because he knows we’re better.”

“Are you always like this?” I asked. He just kept grinning at me.

“More than we can take, most of the time,” Jeff said.

But before Drew could answer a woman came running up to him and said, “Drew, honey, I’m so glad I found you.”

“Is something wrong Lea?” Drew asked looking concerned. As much of a joker as Drew was, it was very apparent that he was very much in love with his wife.

“No, I just didn’t know where you were.”

He smacked his head, “I’m so sorry, honey, I forgot to leave you a message.”

“It’s okay,” then she spotted me, smiled, and said, “Who are you?”

“Oh I’m...” I contemplated on what name to give her, “I’m Isabel.”

“It’s nice to meet you Isabel, I’m Lea.”

“It’s nice to meet you too.”

Drew looked at his wife and said, “This is Nick’s new girlfriend.”

“Oh, so you’re that beautiful girl that Nick keeps ranting and raving about,” she paused and looked thoughtful before she said, “Wait, I thought his girlfriend’s name is Jennifer.”

Oops, I apparently gave her the wrong name, “Well it is, but my stage name is Isabel.”

“Stage name? Why does it sound so familiar?” she paused again, then came to a sudden realization as her face went into shock, “Oh my gosh, you’re the one that sings the new duet with Nick. It’s such an honor to meet you. That song is so beautiful.”

“Thank you,” I said blushing. I never met anyone who reacted that way to my singing before and I thought Eric was bad. Heck I thought Nick was bad.

“I’m your #1 fan,” she said, still looking like she was in shock.

“Honey, calm down,” Drew said as the other two just looked on in amusement.

“Are you really that good?” Jeff asked.

“You’re asking the wrong person, you...”

“Are you kidding me? Haven’t you heard the song yet? She’s incredible,” Lea interrupted.

“Really?” Justin asked.

“So you two haven’t heard it yet?” I asked a little confused.

“Nick wouldn’t let us,” Jeff said.

“Have you heard it Drew?”

“Nope.”

“How can that be? Why has Lea heard it and not the rest of you? And didn’t you tell me that you thought I was computer generated?”

“Well yes, but it wasn’t the duet, and we didn’t get to hear too much.” Drew replied.

“Nick let me hear the song before it was released. I wanted to meet you ever since then. Nick took great pains to make sure that the rest of the guys hadn’t heard it yet,” Lea said.

“But why would he do such a crazy thing like that?” I asked.

“Crazy thing like what, honey?” Nick asked me from behind.

I jumped at the sound of his voice, “Nick, don’t sneak up on my like that,” I said smacking his arm.

“Sorry,” he said kissing me on the neck. If there’s one thing I can definitely say about Nick it’s that he doesn’t have any qualms about public displays of affection.

“Nicky,” I said, while containing my laugher, “Stop, it tickles.”

Stopping he said, “All right, you’re off the hook for now. But a crazy thing like what honey?” he asked again.

“Like not letting your friends hear the song, but letting your sister-in-law hear it.”

“It’s simple,” he stated.

“Really? Then would you care to explain?” I asked looking at him.

“Well, it’s because I wanted them to see what you were like before they heard you.”

“Why?” I asked, suspiciously. He was being very mysterious.

“No reason really, oh and I wanted to surprise them by having them meet you through this.”

“Okay, I’ll give it to you,” I said looking back at the others.

The four of them were just staring at us through our whole conversation. Then Jeff said, “Well Nick, we’re just glad to know that she’s not imaginary after all.”

“Yeah, I was getting pretty scared when he talked about you before you two met, though,” Drew said absentmindedly.

Jeff, Justin, and Lea all turned their heads to look at him and said in unison, “What?”

[Baby_Girl89]

Drew gave a sheepish grin and said, “Oops.”

“It’s okay Drew,” Nick said.

“What’s he talking about Nick?” Jeff asked.

Nick looked at me and I mouthed, “What?”

“I’m so sorry Nick; I didn’t mean to say anything, especially with her here,” Drew apologized.

Nick reassured him, “Drew it’s okay, she already knows.” Drew let out a huge sigh of relief.

“Again I ask, what is he talking about?” Jeff was getting anxious.

“Well, there’s something I didn’t tell you guys about her. Before we met...”

But before Nick could finish the director came over, “Nick, Isabel, we need you two on the set now.”

“Sorry guys, I’ll have to tell you later, or maybe Drew can tell you.”

So we walked away and I could just feel the three of them being as confused as ever trying to get Drew to talk. The whole video shoot was a strange new experience I didn’t think I could ever get used to. First we started with the middle of the song. It didn’t make any sense to me, but I went with it. I figured they had enough experience to know what they were doing. The other thing was the whole lip-syncing thing. It felt really unnatural to me. Nick assured me that it would get easier. I mean I understood why it had to be done, but it still didn’t feel right. Personally I think singing live is more fun, so I kind of sung along under my breath.


* * * * *


I used to tell people that I lip-synced to an invisible tape recorder in my back pocket. Naturally I only said it when I got complimented. My friends thought it was funny. They never believed me, of course, but they thought that it was pretty creative. It obviously wasn’t going to be very believable considering I never really knew what music I would be singing for the day, but it was still fun nonetheless to say it.


* * * * *


Anyway, when we had our first scene for the day perfected we got a ten minute break before we had to continue. Apparently the guys and Lea stopped hounding Drew about the situation after about a half an hour of his silence. He refused to say anything. He told them that it would be better told from Nick’s point of view. So for the rest of the time they watched us working together and they finally got to hear the song, or at least the piece we were working on. During that ten minute break the MTV crew decided to talk to me for the show.

“So how are you feeling?”

“Nervous, in fact I feel more nervous now than before we started shooting. Nick’s really been great about all this though.”

“We see a lot of chemistry between the two of you, what do you think his girlfriend will say when she sees this?”

“I think she’ll be okay with it, she’s not really the jealous type,” I replied thinking about how funny the situation really was.

“What about you, do you have someone special in your life?”

“Yeah, he’s great too. Everything’s perfect. But if you’ll excuse me I have to get ready for the next shoot.” I realized at that point that until Nick and I were ready to reveal what we had, we were going to have to be more careful. I knew that Nick couldn’t help himself, but he was going to have to learn. I went to find him to tell him about it. I discovered him trying to explain to the others our situation. I could tell because they all had very perplexed faces, even Drew, who had to deal with it the whole time, looked confused.

I snuck behind him and started to tickle his stomach. He turned around, looked at me and moved in for a kiss when I turned my head. “Hey what was that for?” he asked.

“Nicky, no one else knows about us,” I stated.

“I know that,” he said making it sound like it was nothing.

“Then act like it,” he looked at me confused, “Unless you’re planning on telling people about us today, behave yourself.”

“Oh,” he said, finally getting it.

“Yeah, oh.”

“Well maybe we should,” he said.

“Really?” I asked trying to figure out what he was up to.

“Yeah, I think it’s safe for people to find out we’re dating now, don’t you?” I had to think about that. Was it safe? But then again wasn’t it always safe? What was I so worried about? Who was I protecting really? “Honey, are you okay?” he asked, after I didn’t respond for a while.

“Oh, yeah, I just...”

“If you don’t want to tell people it’s okay too, it’s not that big a deal. Besides it’s kind of fun playing it like a secret.”

“You wouldn’t think horribly of me if I said no?” I asked.

“Of course not baby, don’t be silly. I know when the time is right for you we’ll let the people know.”

“Thanks honey. But you know what, maybe it is time to let the cat out of the bag so to speak. At least slowly. I don’t want it to come out in too much of a flurry, besides it’ll make the kissing scenes that much more fun.”

“I like the way you think.”

“I thought so.”

“You two really look like you’re in love,” Jeff commented.

For a while there I had forgotten that there were people around us. Every time I was with Nick it really felt like we were the only two people on the planet. I think Nick momentarily forgot they were there too, he started to blush a little. Then he said, “Of course we do, we are in love.” Then he gave me kiss to “prove” it. Then he said, “Well we better get going.” Then we started to walk away hand in hand.

“Wait you haven’t finished yet,” Jeff said.

“Yes, I have,” Nick said, turning his head.

“Well then I’m still confused,” Jeff replied.

“Can’t help you there.” And we walked off.

“Nick that wasn’t very nice,” I said to him once we were out of hearing distance.

“Well, honey what was I supposed to do, stand there and explain it to him until he understood it?”

“That probably would have been the right thing to do.”

“That might have taken an eternity and I would rather spend that time doing something better,” he said giving me one of his mischievous grins, “If you know what I mean.”

“Oh you,” I said pushing him with my shoulder. When we got back to where everybody was, we were still holding hands.

“Well don’t you two look a little too cozy?” the director asked.

“Huh, what?” I asked absentmindedly; then I remembered his hand was in mine. I looked down at our hands and then I looked up into Nick’s eyes. Then I turned my head to the director and said, “Well I guess we have something to say.”

The director said, “No need, it was pretty obvious right from the beginning. We figured you two would tell us when you wanted to, if you wanted to.”

“You won’t tell anyone will you?” I asked.

“Of course not. It’s your business, not mine.”

“Thanks,” I said relieved.

“But to tell you the truth, most of the people here already have it figured out,” he stated.

“Well that’s good to know,” I said. “I just hope MTV doesn’t decide to air what they know. I think Nick and I would rather tell the world ourselves than having someone else start a rumor.”

“Don’t worry I’ll talk to them about it for you two. In the mean time you two need to get ready for the next piece. You’ll like it, it’s the kissing scene.”

Nick and I just smiled. It was so great how everyone was taking it. I don’t know what I was so worried about.

Wait, I remember, and this wasn’t it. Something else inside was bugging me. It was something that I wasn’t supposed to be worried about, but had good reason to be. I didn’t want to lose Nick, and I thought that telling people about us might cause it to happen. I don’t really know why. I guess I just felt that there were forces that were going to work to try and keep us apart. It was lucky for me that our love was just stronger.

Nick kept holding my hand and led me away to get ready. Whatever insecurities I felt, all I had to do was look into his big beautiful blue eyes to know that everything really was going to be okay. He seemed to melt my problems away with just one look. And I just knew, he was definitely the one I was supposed to be with.

We did the scene, which luckily happened to be the last for the day. It ended with the kiss which was also a good thing because once we got started we couldn’t stop. They yelled cut and we decided that it wasn’t enough. Luckily in talking with MTV they decided not to film that part. It was very fortunate for us that they respected our privacy.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 23~


After the shooting was done for the day the guys, Jeff, Justin, and Drew, and Lea, decided to take Nick and me out to dinner. It was a celebration for my first video getting started. I sort of protested their reasoning, but they still wanted to take us out anyway. I mean shouldn’t the dinner be saved for when the video was finished? I believe it was just an excuse to get to know me better.

Anyway, that night we went to dinner and Justin brought a date while Jeff brought his wife. Apparently their significant others wanted to meet me too. Honestly, it didn’t make any sense to me. When they saw me they started freaking out as much as Lea had, maybe not as bad, but it was close enough. I was beginning to fear that I was going to have to give a private concert. My fear was realized, but that comes later. Anyway we had a nice dinner. They all kept asking me questions, Drew as always was the first to start.

“So, why are you with my brother?” he asked as soon as we had settled down. Lea smacked him in the arm for the comment.

Still I answered, “Well Drew honestly I don’t really have an answer for it, except that I’m in love with him,” I turned my head to look at Nick as I said it. He looked down at me and gave me one of his amazing smiles.

“But why?” Drew pressed on. Lea stared at him sternly, but he seemed oblivious to it. Then he said “Ow,” I can only imagine what Lea did then.

“Do I need a why for being in love?” I asked him. As I looked out of the corner of my eye I could see everyone around us staring at us, but when I turned my head they made themselves look busy by looking in their menus.

“Well, I just don’t get it that’s all. I mean you could probably have anyone and you chose my brother?”

“Andrew John Lachey,” Lea said, “That’s enough out of you. What does it matter why she’s with your brother?”

“Because I never understand why anyone’s ever with my brother,” he said looking at her.

I had to stifle a laugh. Nick looked at me and said, “You think that’s funny?”

“Yeah, I do actually. I wonder myself sometimes.”

“Do you?” he asked slyly.

“Yeah, got a problem with that Lachey?” I asked him playing into his game.

“No, but maybe I can refresh your memory.” Then he pulled me in for a kiss. Nick was always up for “showing” me how much he loved me. And I loved making him do it too.

When we finished I said, “Oh yeah, now I remember. I can’t resist those luscious Lachey lips of yours.”

Drew’s jaw dropped and the three other females just stared at us. They didn’t even try to hide it this time. Then Lea and Drew as well as Trish, Jeff’s wife, and Jeff went into married mode, while Crystal, Justin’s girl said, “Justin, why don’t you do things like that to me?” Apparently, it didn’t seem to faze them that we did that. It was like they already knew. Maybe they were already told.

Justin tried to say something to her, but he couldn’t seem to find the words. Then he said to Nick, “Man, Nick, why do you always have to get me in trouble?”

Nick just sat there laughing at him. Then luckily the waiter came to take our orders. At that point I suddenly realized how hungry I had actually become. I was literally starving or at least really famished. I was tempted to order a plate of spaghetti, but Nick already got Justin in trouble, it just didn’t seem right. So instead I ordered a plate of lasagna.

When the waiter left Justin quickly changed the subject before Crystal could start again, “So Jenn.”

“Jenn, wait I thought her name was Isabel,” Trish proclaimed.

Oh no, here we go again, I thought. “Oh yeah it is, I’m sorry Isabel, I had you confused with someone else for a second there.”

“That’s okay,” I said and thought, Nice save Justin.

“So anyway, how do you like being in this business so far?” Jeff asked to keep Justin from getting into anymore trouble.

“It’s interesting. It’s nice having someone there to tell me what I need to know. But it’s just nice having him here. It’s a good way for us to spend time together this summer.” Nick hugged me tight as I put my head on his shoulder.

“Well I’m glad I could help in any way I could,” Nick said. Then he added, “When I first heard her sing I knew the world had to hear her too. She’s got an amazing gift. And she’s written so many songs. I couldn’t let that slip through my fingers.”

“Admit it Nick, you thought you were slipping,” Drew said, “That’s why you needed her, she’s gonna help you rise to the top.” Once again he said, “Ow,” but then said, “What d’ya do that for?” he said looking at Nick.

“What?” Nick said innocently.

“Drew, what’s wrong with you today? Why are you doing this to Nick tonight?” Lea asked him, making him look at her.

“Well I figured, if she can take this she definitely belongs with him.”

“Oh so that’s your plan, huh Drew?” I said, “Well throw whatever you want at me, I can take it all. But I wanna know, who are you testing really?” Drew shut up after that, while I kept smiling. Everyone looked at me like who is this girl?

Then Nick whispered in my ear, “You are amazing, in more ways than one. That’s the first time he’s ever really shut up. I think you won.”

“Well you won my heart. How do you expect me not to fight for the man I love?” I asked looking at him and giving him a smile. Then the food arrived. The conversation after that was pretty mild. Drew didn’t really make any more comments about his brother. But I did have a lot of questions to answer anyway. The girls wanted to know how it was that we came to be together in the first place. They imagined something a lot more romantic than I could tell them I’m sure, but it was certainly good enough for me. They thought it quite interesting when I told them that I was in love with Nick since I was fifteen. Drew might have finally understood something about the relationship.

When the dinner was over we went to the hotel that Nick and I were staying at. We all talked some more and then, Trish got a “great” idea. “I have a great idea,” she said, “I think that Nick and Isabel should sing their song for us. Kind of use us as a practice audience.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Yeah, it would be kind of cool to hear her sing live,” Jeff said, “Aside from that we never really got to hear her at all. We didn’t really get to hear the song at the shoot today.”

My nerves started playing with me. My face sort of went into shock at what they said. Was I ready to perform the song in front of an audience this way? That really didn’t make sense to me. I used to go around on Halloween singing for my candy to complete strangers. So why did it seem so hard? But then I realized it was because I didn’t know those people so if they thought I was bad I wouldn’t really have to worry about it, but these were people I was bound to continue seeing and I didn’t want to mess up. I know it seems as if my worries were probably for nothing considering the things people told me or the things people had to say about the song, but the song was on a CD anything could have been done to it. They wanted me to do it live.

I think Nick noticed my apparent fear so he squeezed my hand and said to me, “Honey, it’s gonna be okay. You don’t have to do it if you’re not ready yet. But if you are, I’m here for you. We’re doing this together, so just pretend that no one else is here and that it’s just me and you. But you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

I could hear the eagerness in his voice for me to do it, but I was just so scared. On the other hand as much as I wanted to politely decline I couldn’t let Nick down so I looked at him and said, “I’ll do it.”

“Are you sure?” he asked me, although I’m sure he didn’t want to afraid that I might change my mind.

I took a second to make sure and said, “Let’s do it. I wanna make you proud.”

He smiled and said, “Too late, you already have.”

I smiled back and we got up. I took a couple of deep breaths looked Nick in the eyes and started the song. Then he joined in and I suddenly forgot where we were and that there were people around us. I relaxed and just let the song go. I felt that song every time I ever sang it with him, but that moment was even more magical than one can imagine. I could feel the love surging through my body, empowering me to just sing and before I knew it the song was over and Nick was holding me in his arms.

Then a burst of applause broke our peace. I snapped out of it and turned my head to see six figures standing and clapping wildly. “That was awesome you guys,” Jeff said.

“Yeah, you really are as amazing as Lea said,” Justin exclaimed.

Then Drew said, “Nick I don’t know how you did it, but you really picked yourself an angel among men.”

Lea was beaming, “Isabel, you’re even better live. I can’t believe that one day I can say that I knew you, maybe even say that I’m related to you,” she said giving me a sly grin.

I just kept smiling. I should have said something, but the feeling was so overwhelming that it left me speechless.

Trish and Crystal were both gushing over me. They even asked for my autograph. I eventually found my tongue and said, “Yeah, of course, but I don’t think it’ll ever be worth much.”

“Girl you have got to be kidding me,” Trish said in disbelief. “You are going to be huge. And one day I’ll be able to say that I was at your first private performance. You should’ve been the first American Idol. Why didn’t you audition?”

“Well I guess I never really thought I had a chance.”

“You’re crazy, you are awesome.” I couldn’t help but keep smiling.

Then Nick said to me, “I knew you could do it beautiful. And one day, it’ll be millions of screaming fans.” Somehow the process of it all just eluded me. Could Nick be right? I wondered. It didn’t matter though, because to me if I even had a couple of loyal “fans” such as them, I would be happy.

For the rest of the night, I continued to give them a performance. I sang a couple of songs that were going to be on my album and just a couple of songs done by other artists. My favorite one was “My All” by Mariah Carey. That song used to get me through a lot when I thought about Nick. To me it felt like it expressed a lot of my emotions about how I was feeling about him. I also performed “You Don’t Know” I think they really liked that one. That was also a song that felt really close to home with me. To me it always felt like Nick didn’t know. But it also felt like he would never know, fortunately I was wrong about that part.

When the night was over everybody left and Nick and I were alone. But before Drew left he apologized to his brother for his behavior in the restaurant.

“I’m really sorry for the way I was acting in the restaurant.”

“Hey it’s okay.”

“I mean I still don’t get it, but I shouldn’t have been such an ass about it.”

“It’s okay, I kind of thought that it was funny, anyway.”

“Well, Lea didn’t seem to think it was so funny.”

“Well that comment about me slipping was a little out of line.”

“You’re right I shouldn’t have said that you were using your girlfriend to get you out of trouble.”

“I would never do that to her. I love her too much. Although I really thought it was funny when she got you to shut up the way you did.”

“Yeah, she really stumped me with that one. Anyway I know you love her, I can see it, she loves you too you know. You two are perfect for each other, just like me and Lea.”

“Thanks,” then they hugged and Drew left. I had a smile on my face when Nick came back into the room. I felt kind of bad for eavesdropping, but I was glad that I did. “And what are you smiling about, beautiful?”

“You.”

“Me? Really why?” he asked smiling.

I looked at him and said, “It still amazes me that this is the life that I live now Nick and it’s all because of you.”

“No it was always in you,” he replied, “I just helped you along.”

“But without your help I wouldn’t be here.”

“You would’ve made it anyway, I’m just lucky enough to have been the one to get to you first.”

“I love you Nicky.”

“And I love you Jenn,” then he kissed me again.

“Well it’s getting late now; we should probably get some sleep. We’ve got a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”

“You’re right, goodnight angel.”

“Goodnight handsome.” After one last kiss he departed and went into his adjoining room. It was a very good day and night for me indeed.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 24~


The next morning I woke up so refreshed, but I forgot where I was. I had forgotten about everything and then I heard a knock, “Come in,” I said.

And then Nick opened the door between our rooms, popped his head in, and said, “Good morning beautiful.”

And then all of a sudden flashes of the night before started to appear in my mind. I thought I only dreamt it, but with Nick standing there I thought, Well it wouldn’t have been impossible. Then I said, “Good morning Nicky.”

He walked through the door and sat down on my bed and gave me a kiss. “Did you sleep well?”

Stretching I said, “Very. How about you?”

“Hardly,” he answered.

“And why is that?” I asked curious as to why this handsome man of mine would have a hard time sleeping.

“I kept thinking you were a dream last night. I thought that everything that had happened never happened. It scared me out of my wits. And I didn’t want to come in here to check because I didn’t want to disturb you, and then knowing that you might be next door, but that I had to wait to see you, was driving me nuts.”

“Oh, baby, I’m sorry,” I said feeling sympathy toward him.

“Don’t be, there’s nothing you can do about it. I just get to feeling that you’re just one big dream and that one day I’m going to wake up and find that you’re not really in my life.”

“I know how you feel, but for now, it’s gonna be okay.” He smiled and my heart flew. I still didn’t know how he could be real. Then I asked him, “Nicky, what happened yesterday?”

“Don’t you remember?”

“Well my mind is being really fogged between reality and fantasy right now, if you know what I mean.”

“Okay, well we started the shoot, which we need to be getting to and then we had dinner with the guys and their girls, then we came back here and you gave us a performance.”

“So it was real.”

“Of course it was.”

“Well before I was beginning to think that I was never going to meet the guys so when I thought about it last night in my sleep I assumed it was just a dream, I didn’t really think that it happened.”

“Understandable. What time is it?” he asked me.

“Eight,” I answered.

“Well we have to be there in an hour, do you think you’ll be ready in a half an hour.”

“Nick I can be ready in fifteen minutes. I think it’s you, we have to worry about.”

“Hey, I can get ready just as quickly as you can.”

I smile crept over my face, “Is that a challenge, Lachey?”

“You bet it is, ready set ...” but before he could say “go” I was up and out of my bed fixing myself up.

Ten minutes later I was ready, “And look at that I’ve got five minutes to spare, I’m good,” I said to myself.

Nick came back to my room two minutes later thinking he was gonna beat me, but I was standing there waiting for him keeping an eye on my watch. “Dang it woman. How d’ya do that? You cheated.”

“Excuse me, I did not cheat, I’m just faster, admit it.”

“I’m not admitting anything,” he said with mock pride.

“Oh you’re not are you,” I said as I walked toward him. As soon as I reached him my hands headed straight for his stomach and I started tickling him. He couldn’t hold his fake haughtiness for long he broke out laughing and fell back onto my bed. Then he started fighting back. Stupid me, I should’ve known not to start a tickle fight with him. I swear I never learn my lesson. He ended up on top of me and this time instead of getting off he moved in very slowly for a kiss. Boy did it feel good. We eventually stopped, got up, and headed out the door, holding hands and beaming about the morning events. It definitely felt like it was going to be a good day.


* * * * *


When we arrived at the shoot we were five minutes early so we got to start early. It wasn’t by much, but even a little extra time is better than nothing. I wasn’t really used to the whole getting fussed over thing though, it felt a little unnatural and a little uncomfortable. But I stayed seated and waited for them to get done what they needed to do. Nick sat in his chair with a smile on his face the whole time and I could just see the make-up artists thinking, What in the world is Nick so happy about this morning? And I could see him looking at me in the mirror ‘cause I was doing the same thing.

When we finished getting our make-up on we had to pick out the clothing we needed for the day. I had no idea what part of the song we were doing for the day, but apparently the costume artists did. But the outfit they picked out for me was something I would never really wear. I had major problems with it.

They picked out a half shirt that looked like it would fit my five year old niece better than it would fit me. When I saw the outfit I said, “Are you kidding me? You don’t really want me to wear this do you? I’m sorry I don’t fit into the whole Britney Spears thing. I’m afraid you’re just going to have to find me something else to wear.”

“I’m sorry Miss,” the costume artist said.

“Please call me Isabel,” I said to her.

“Isabel, but this is what the director thinks will go better with this part of the song.”

“Look, I don’t care what part of the song it is, but I will not parade around in that shirt, if you can even call it a shirt, it looks more like a bra.”

Nick heard me and came in, at least he looked normal, “What’s going on here?” he asked.

“Well Mr. Lachey...” she started.

“Nick.”

“Well Nick, Miss Isabel...” she went on.

“Isabel, no miss.”

“Isabel,” she continued, “refuses to wear the outfit that has been picked for her.”

He looked at me, “Why honey?”

“Because,” I said pointing to the shirt, “look at it.”

“What’s wrong with it?”

“Nicky, it looks like a bra, you know something that should be worn underneath your clothes, not actually be your clothes.”

“Jess, never had problems wearing things like that,” I glared at him, realizing he did something wrong he said, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean that.” Then he looked at Tamra, the costume girl, and said, “Find her something else.” So Tamra walked away to try and look for something else.

“Thank you,” I said.

He looked at me again and said, “I’m really sorry baby, I really didn’t mean it.”

“Really? So you don’t want me to be like ‘Jess’?” I asked quite annoyed that he would even say something like that to me. I mean if he really had a problem with the way I felt like looking and wanted someone like “Jess” maybe he should’ve stayed with her after all.

“No, because if I wanted Jess I would’ve stayed with Jess. This is the way I want you. If you’re not comfortable with something tell me about it and I’ll make sure it’s taken care of. And I’m still really really sorry.”

“Well...” I had to ponder this a little, but then he gave me a puppy dog look and dog gone it I can’t resist that look, “It’s okay Nicky, I forgive you. It’s just that I don’t want to be like the typical female pop star. I mean I know how impressionable these young girls are that listen to us and how they see us as role models and I don’t want to be that way. Listen to me talking about it as if I’m already one of them. But anyway, if not dressing like that is going to make me not be one of them and not get the attention that they do then maybe I don’t want that attention. Does that make any sense to you?”

“Yeah, it does, and you know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way,”he said giving me a smile.

Then he was about to move in for a kiss when she came back and handed me a shirt that was slightly longer. I looked at it and said, “What’s this Tamra?”

“You’re new shirt Isabel.”

“Well it’s better I’ll give it that but...why don’t you tell me what part of the song we’re doing?”

“Maybe you should go talk to the director,” she said sighing.

I said, “I’m sorry,” to her because I could tell she was getting frustrated.

She took a deep breath before saying, “It’s not your fault, but you might want to go talk to the director.”

“Thanks,” then Nick and I walked out to go find the director.

“Mr. Isham,” I called out when I saw him.

“Please call me Wayne.”

“Okay, Wayne.”

Then as if just seeing me, he said, “Why aren’t you dressed, Isabel? We’re about to start shooting.”

“That’s what I want to talk to you about.”

“About what?”

“My clothing. You see Tamra gave me something that looked like it was more fit for a five year old than me. And then when she brought me a new shirt it was better, but it was only upgraded to a ten year old.”

“What, don’t you wear clothes like that? I thought all the pop stars wore clothes like that.”

“I wouldn’t be caught dead in them,” Nick said.

“I meant female pop stars,” Wayne stated.

“I know I was trying to lighten the mood.”

Looking at Nick I said, “Thanks Nicky, but let me take care of this.” Then I turned back to Wayne, “Look I’m not like the other females and if that’s going to be a problem we could always get someone else to do it.”

“I’m sorry we just assumed...” Wayne began.

I wouldn’t let him finish, “Well you assumed wrong. I like looking normal. I know this is a music video and most women don’t really wear what they’d wear in the videos in real life, but I wanna be different or at least comfortable.”

“All right, well then here’s the deal, in this scene you two are gonna go for a nice stroll. Go find something suitable for the stroll.”

I smiled at him and said, “Thank you.”

“No thank you, it’s nice to meet someone who does what she wants to do for once.”

I kept smiling and Nick and I walked back to the dressing room. Tamra said, “So what did Mr. Isham say?”

[Baby_Girl89]

“He told me to look for something I would feel comfortable in, well not exactly, but close enough.”

“All right well follow me,” Tamra said. So I followed her with Nick right behind me. We walked into a room full of clothes it was ridiculous.

“Have all of these things been worn before?” I asked.

“Actually most of it’s relatively new.” Then she pointed to a rack and said, “That’s the shirt rack, I hope you find what you like.”

“Um...what type of pants do I have to wear?”

“I suppose you could look for those too,” she pointed to another rack and said, “That’s the pants rack. Have fun, but don’t take too long, we’re really pressed for time now.”

“What about shoes?”

“I think the tennis shoes you’re wearing should be fine, but if not we’ll worry about it later.”

“Thanks,” and she left. “Well Nicky, wanna help?”

“Of course.” So we headed toward the shirt rack. Nick picked up a shirt like the one Britney wore in her “Crazy” video. “Hey you’d look good in this one.”

“Nick,” I said.

“All right, I was just kidding, well kind of.” I laughed at his last comment. Then he walked up to me holding out a baby blue shirt that said “Angel” on it. “What about this one?” he asked. “I think it really works for you.”

“Well it’s cute and it probably won’t show too much skin, I guess I could try it on. So should we keep looking or move onto the pants?”

“Let’s move onto the pants.”

So we walked over to the pants rack and I spotted something that looked vaguely familiar. When I got to it I suddenly knew why. I picked them up and walked them over to Nick, “Don’t these look familiar?”

“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe they have a pair of these here.”

“I can’t believe you wore them. Guys don’t usually wear jeweled pants Nick, at least not that tight, okay wait not at all. What were you thinking?”

“It was during my lapse of judgement time.”

“You mean like when you wore that pink shirt.”

“Don’t remind me.” Then he pulled a pair of pants off the rack and said, “Why don’t you wear these, their cute and I bet you’d look killer in them.”

They were cute I had to give him that. They were denim flares with butterfly patches sewn in on the bottom. So I took them and headed to the dressing room and changed while Nick waited outside to see his masterpiece. I thought it was kind of weird that he was the one to choose my outfit for me. I was beginning to wonder if maybe Nick might be well you know gay, but then again he was trying to put them on me, so I don’t know. After I changed I came out and said, “What d’ya think?”

“Gorgeous, as usual.”

“The shirt’s not too tight?”

“You’re asking the wrong guy,” he replied.

Definitely not gay, I thought to myself, especially with that goofy grin on his face. “Oh Nick,” I said.

“The question is though, how do you feel about it?” always the concerned one.

“Good,” I said.

“Then that’s all that matters.” What perfect timing we had because that’s when Tamra came to find us to tell us to get out on the set.

“Lookin’ good. I really like your style, very different, it’s definitely gonna get you noticed.”

“Thanks Tamra.” Then turning to Nick I said, “Well we better get going.”

“Ready?”

“I’m more than ready,” and we rushed out to the set.

The set was so beautiful. It was an image of a park that Nick and I were supposed to walk through, during a beautiful autumn day. They had the leaves fall from the trees to give it that fall look. It was gorgeous. If it weren’t supposed to be filmed and Nick and I were really going on a date, it would’ve been a great one. (I’m sure Nick thought the same thing because we ended up having a fall like date days later, but anyway.)

We were supposed to start from the back and walk toward everyone looking like we were having a conversation, or just enjoying ourselves. It was before the music started. Then Nick had to say something like, “There’s something I have to tell you.”

And then I say, “What is it?”

He says, “I’m falling in love with you,” and I sort of get a shocked look on my face as we conveniently stop in front of a bench and I sit down. He sits down next to me and says, “Are you okay, I didn’t mean to scare you. I know it’s only been awhile but...”

“No I’m fine,” I respond.

Then he says, “How do you feel?”

And that’s when the music starts and I begin to relay how I’ve been feeling. The beginning goes something like this:

“You ask me how I feel
Honestly I never really thought about it
But now here with you
I’ve begun to see
That you are the one for me.”

Then he joins in for the chorus and the scene ends there. Then we worked on another part of the song where we are at the park still. The song is sort of done in like flashbacks and like the fireworks/chemistry is shown through things that we did in the past “getting to know” each other.

Amazingly the video was finished by that night. We put the finishing touches on, that night, when we did shoots that involved working with nightly activities and they wanted it to look authentic so we did them outside. When we were done the video turned out great. MTV showed us what footage they got of us working on the video and then they showed us what they were planning on airing. Luckily they left out all of the parts that could incriminate Nick and me too early. We were very thankful. Next they told us that they wanted us to introduce it on the world premiere on TRL, even though the Making of the Video would already be aired.

It was quite the shock to me. The Making of the Video was one thing, but to be on national television live already, well that was quite another. I asked them if I could think it over first and they gave me some time. Nick was up for it, but let’s face it that boy’s always up for anything. But what was really nice was that he was being really supportive of me.

When we got back to the hotel he started our discussion about it. We spent the ride back in silence, I had to think and Nick knew it. But when we got back to our room I don’t think he could take the silence anymore. So as soon as we sat down he took my hand in his and said, “Honey, if you don’t want to go yet, it’s okay too. I don’t want you moving too fast. Take you’re time. They’ll be other chances.”

I looked him square in the eye and said, “But you really wanna go though, don’t you?”

“I won’t go without you.”

“But you really wanna go though, don’t you?” I asked again, forcing him to answer my question.

“Well yes, but I don’t wanna pressure you,” he answered honestly.

“Well you could always go on your own.”

“But I already told you I don’t wanna go without you. It’s your song too.”

“Yeah, but it’s really mostly yours. I mean if people really knew about me, or if I had my own single that would be a different deal, but most of the people there would be there to support you, not me,” I said looking down at our locked hands.

“That’s not true honey,” he said taking his free hand and tipping my face up so that I had to look at him, “Don’t you remember all those things that people had to say about your incredible voice?”

“Nick...” I started to protest.

“No, I mean it. You are incredible,” he said enunciating each of the last three words very clearly. “And you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” he said smiling at me. I smiled back, I couldn’t help it, his smiles always seemed to do that to me.

So I thought about it for a little bit, then I said, “When did he say we were gonna go?”

I saw another smile spread across his beautiful lips, “Does that mean yes?” he asked eagerly.

“No, it means maybe,” I said.

“It’s good enough for me. I believe it’s in about a week or two.”

“When’s the Making of the Video airing?”

“Well today’s Saturday, so probably Monday.”

“That fast? Don’t they usually need to show commercials for it or something?”

“Who knows, why?”

“I guess I just wanted to have a copy of it for my records.”

“I can get you one of those, easy.”

“All right I confess, I just wanted to see myself on TV,” I joked. “Just kidding.”

“I know, you’re not that conceited.”

“I could be,” I said mockingly hurt.

“No you couldn’t, not even if your life depended on it.”

“Shut up,” I said gently pushing him with my shoulders.

“Make me,” he responded.

“Is that another challenge I hear?”

“Could be.”

“Well...I’m not taking you up on it this time,” I said teasingly.

“You tease,” then he got this look of hunger in his eyes as he smiled slyly this time and pulled me in for one heck of a kiss. His passion is always oh so sweet. I was loving my life with him. For once I was actually loving life. He made me feel so special and so complete.

When we finished making out, it was about time to get some sleep, considering it was two in the morning. So after a bit of reluctance on both our parts, Nicky departed me and went into his room. I could hear him humming something again, no doubt perhaps a new song that was to be written. It didn’t matter to me, it was just a comfort to know that he was in the room next to mine. I got up, changed my clothes, and got back into bed. I fell asleep to the sound of Nick. After a while I couldn’t tell if it was him or just my head anymore, but once again I had a great night’s rest. I had a lot to still think about, but my head was working it out for me.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 25~

I woke up the next morning with a head hanging over my face. “Nick, what are you doing in here?” I whispered. I wasn’t quite awake yet.

“I wanted to watch you sleep.”

“What time is it?”

“Seven.”

“Seven? How long have you been in here?” I asked curious and maybe a bit scared. (Just kidding.) Actually I kind of thought that it was endearing.

He smiled as he thought about it and said, “Since about six, I couldn’t get back to sleep.”

“Why not?”

“Too busy thinking about you,” he paused then added, “and trying to figure you out.”

“Nick, you can spend your whole life knowing me, but you’ll never figure me out.”

“I know,” he said smiling at me. Then he bent down to kiss me. Nice wake-up call. I sat up and just stared at him. We kind of just sat on my bed in silence for a while. Then he said, “You’re beautiful, you know that?”

“Nick, I’m not as beautiful as you...”

“Don’t even think of finishing that sentence. You are the most beautiful woman on the face of the earth. In the universe even,” he paused, and then continued, holding my hand in his, “Inside and out.”

“I’m so lucky to have a guy like you.” I reached over to draw him into a hug as I continued, “I don’t know how it happened, but I really do believe now.”

“In what?” he asked as we released each other.

“Miracles,” I said.

“If anything, it’s probably made me more of a believer.”

“Really?” I asked curiously.

“Definitely,” his smile brightened as he continued, “it was a miracle that I found you before I made the biggest mistake of my life.”

“I’m sure it wouldn’t have been the biggest mistake.”

“Well I guess it doesn’t matter anymore.”

I suddenly got a serious look on my face as I remembered one of my very old dreams/nightmares, I’m not sure what it was, “Nick,” I said solemnly.

His smile faded as concern started to appear, “What honey?”

“Well, I was just wondering, do you think that we’re really meant to be together?” I asked looking him in the eyes searching for an answer.

“What do you mean?” he asked looking slightly worried and a bit confused. I’m sure he had no idea what he was getting himself into.

“I mean if you married Jessica, do you think we still would’ve ended up together?”

Without any hesitation whatsoever he answered, “Yes, I do. I think that if I met you after Jessica and I were married I would still want to be with you because I would have felt the same way that I do now. Why? What do you think would’ve happened?”

“Well...” I closed my eyes, turned my head, and took a deep breath before continuing. Nick was just about to find out the type of girl he was actually with, a crazy one. “Nick, there’s something I have to tell you.”

“Is something wrong?” he asked, his concern mounting.

“Not exactly, but do you promise to hear me out?”

“Of course.”

“Okay. Well I used to have these dreams or as I would sometimes call them nightmares, but in any case, I used to have these really strange dreams about us. At first they weren’t much, they were just dreams that were kind of like what we’re living now. But then I started thinking about other things that scared me so much. I started thinking that you were going to marry Jessica. The weirder part was you two were no where near even being engaged yet. But I started dreaming that I ruined your marriage and the worst part was that you two had this precious little girl that was thrown into the whole mess. Now you need to understand something. Those ‘dreams’ really scared me. I used to have this policy that I would never get involved with a married man or a divorced one and then I had that dream. To me it was like it was trying to tell me that no matter what, you would always be the one that I would want,” for some unknown reason, the story started to get to me and tears started welling up into my eyes, but I pushed on adamant on making sure Nick knew the whole story. “Honestly Nicky, I didn’t like it at all. I didn’t want to be the home wrecker and put a child through such a horrible thing. But I loved her Nicky, like she was my own, and she loved me too. But anyway, I must sound like a nut.” He just looked at me, “Nicky say something,” I pleaded with him. In those few moments of silence I thought to myself, Oh no, I’ve lost him now. He knows what an insane person I am. I shouldn’t have said anything. Me and my darn mouth.

Then he spoke up, “I don’t know what to say,” he said. This worried me, he must have thought I was a nut. I felt like he was slipping and yet somehow the bond felt stronger. I totally didn’t get it. Then he said, “Wait, I do know what to say.” I thought, Oh no, here it comes. Brace yourself Jenn, he’s gone. But instead he raised his hand to wipe away my tears and said, “You don’t sound like a nut. Jenn I think your dreams were trying to say something to you. Don’t you see we are meant to be together, and your subconscious was trying to tell you that nothing could ever stand in the way of our love. But you’re right it’s better that we’re together this way instead of the way your dream predicted. Just think if Jess and I had gotten married when we were supposed to, your dream might have come true.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked.

“Nicky, if you were married to Jessica, do you think you would seriously leave her to chase after a dream?”

“Yes, of course I would,” he answered still keeping his hand on my face, “especially if I knew in my heart that my dream was what I’d been waiting my whole life for. Can’t you see, you make me whole? I feel more complete with you than I’ve ever felt with anyone. I love you and only you.”

“But Nicky, wouldn’t you feel satisfied enough with Jessica to just stay with her. I mean what if I turned out to be something completely different from what you expected, who would you be with?”

“It depends on what you mean by completely different. Because in a way you are, but it just makes me want you more.” Before I could say anything he said, “Why are we talking about this anyway? What’s really wrong? Wasn’t it enough for your dreams to tell you that we should be together?”

“Nick...I…I...I just don’t ever want to lose you and I don’t want you to be with me if you have any doubts about our relationship.”

“If anything, baby, I’d say you have doubts,” he replied. “Look, I love you, let’s not worry about what ifs anymore. This is what’s happening. You are the one I truly want to spend the rest of my life with and I can’t wait to tell everyone that we’re together. Okay?” he asked giving me a smile. I couldn’t help but return it.

But then I said, “No, you think I have doubts?”

“Don’t you? I mean you keep asking and telling me all these things. Honey you have nothing to worry about. How many times do I have to tell you that you’re the only one that I love before you believe me?”

I looked at him and suddenly realized he was right. I was worried over nothing. He did love me. “I’m sorry Nick. I know I must sound insecure or jealous,” the tears started to arise again, “and although I’m trying not to be, maybe I am. It’s just that I never ever expected for something this wonderful to ever happen to me and I guess I don’t want to lose it and if I had to I guess I wanted it to happen now instead of later. So I guess I just wanted to make sure that this is really where you want to be.”

“There’s no place I’d rather be more,” then looking at me slyly he said, “except maybe in your arms.”

I sniffed and put a smile on my face as I said, “Oh really? Then come here,” I grabbed him and pulled him closer to me. He wrapped me in his arms and I knew that, that was where I was meant to be. It was where we were both meant to be. Nothing ever felt more right to me. “So are you happy now?” I asked him.

“More than you’ll ever know,” he whispered to me.

“Oh I think I have a pretty good idea,” I responded.

“I love you, I want to spend the rest of my life loving you.”

“Well that’s up to you, but I don’t know how much of me you’ll ever be able to take.”

“Another challenge? Well I definitely want to win this one, I’ll prove it to you too,” he said. I just smiled and snuggled my head onto his chest. He felt mighty darn good.

About after an hour of just lying there, we finally decided to move, “Nicky,” looking at him, I finally said, “I think we should probably get up now.”

“But I was just starting to get comfortable,” he replied.

“Just starting?” I said lifting my head.

“Okay, but I’m just really comfy right now,” he corrected while giving me a dazzling smile.

“Well we can’t just lie here all day,” I said.

“Why not, I think we could very possibly lie here all day,” he answered giving me a sly grin.

“Well don’t we have anything to do?” I asked. I mean we must have had something we needed to do.

“We could just lie here,” he responded.

“Nicky?” I said giving him a semi-stern look.

“What? Is it so wrong of me to want to spend some time with my girlfriend, alone?” he asked snuggling even closer to me, although I have no idea how that was possible.

“No, but we’ve gotta go sometime, don’t we? I mean what about food?” I asked, hoping it would strike something in him.

[Baby_Girl89]

“That’s what room service is for.” No such luck.

“But...but…”

“But nothing let’s just stay here.”

“That’s romantic,” I said sarcastically.

“Oh so it’s romance you want, I can give you romance,” he answered.

“I don’t even want to know what you could possibly have up your sleeve now.”

“Well I don’t have anything, but I’m sure I can come up with something. Besides, you don’t think spending time with me alone is going to be romantic?”

“Oh, Nicky, it’s just that we’ve spent so much time together alone for the past few months that I want to spend time with other people too. You know have a life outside of each other. It’ll be healthier.”

“But we’ve been spending time with other people for the past two days now, isn’t that enough?” he asked giving me a pout.

“Put that away,” I said.

“What?” he asked, giving me his sly little smile again. Then he pulled me in for one of his deep sensational kisses and I melted.

“You win,” I said, when I could speak again.

“Thought I would, now I don’t have to share you all day.” Well that’s what he thought, but apparently, Drew had a different idea.

He just kept holding me and said, “So tell me angel, what d’ya dream about last night.”

“Mmm, I dreamt about you.”

“I like it already. So what about me?”

“Sure you wanna hear it?” the wheels were turning in my head now.

“Of course I do.”

It was time to mess with his head. Hey if he was planning on keeping me away from the rest of world the least he could do was let me have a little fun. My voice became very sullen and ominous like and I turned my head looking away putting a distant look on my face, “Well,” I began, “I dreamt that you and I weren’t together and that I was with someone else and you were with someone else and we both harbored feelings for each other but were both afraid to say anything. So we were just friends and then you married her and I married him and we spent the rest of our lives just being friends, until one day you had gotten very sick and you asked for me and not your wife and that was when you told me how you felt, but by then it was too late.”

“Really?” he asked looking kind of shocked.

I smiled at him, “Nope.”

“Don’t do that to me,” he said. “Just imagine, that’s exactly what would have happened if I weren’t such an idiot,” then he smiled back.

“Nicky, you’re not an idiot, a little passionate and crazy maybe but definitely not an idiot. I’m so glad that you told me how you felt. I was the one who felt like the idiot. And when you told me how you felt, I was relieved that it was at least possible for you to return my feelings. I used to think that no one in this world would ever love me. But you proved me wrong. Thank you.”

“No, thank you, for coming into my life and showing me what true love is.” We started kissing again and then when our lips parted he started to move down my neck and I felt so good. I was really beginning to appreciate his suggestion. Then his phone started ringing in his room.

“Nicky,” I said

“Huh?”

“Your phone’s ringing.”

“Let it ring,” he said, then continued kissing my neck again.

As much as I wanted him to just keep going I couldn’t. What if it was an important call? “Nicky, go answer it.”

“I don’t wanna.” Just then it stopped. “Besides, they hung up already.”

“You better hope that wasn’t important Lachey.”

“They’ll call back, if it was.” Then my phone started ringing, “What in the world is going on here?” he asked, obviously annoyed.

“Well they must be calling back.”

“But no one has your number. I made sure of that.”

“Did you tell the front desk not to let anyone call?”

“Well no,” he answered.

“Then you didn’t make sure of it. Now I’m gonna answer it.”

“No, don’t,” he pleaded.

“Nick, it might be important. Please honey.”

“All right,” he conceded.

I picked up the phone, “Hello?”

“Jenn?” I heard a male voice ask.

“May I ask who’s calling?”

“Oh sorry, it’s Drew.”

“Oh, hi Drew.” Nick gave me a sour looking face at the mention of his brother’s name.

“I was wondering if you knew where my brother is?”

“You’re brother, you wanna know where he is?” I asked, Nick started shaking his head no. “I’m sorry but I can’t tell you that.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Oh I really need to talk to him, can you tell him I called?”

“Of course I can.”

“Um...Lea and I were wondering if maybe the two of you would like to go to dinner tonight with us. With just the two of us, to celebrate the completion of your first video.”

“Dinner, tonight. Umm...” Nick shook his head no, then he got a look of hunger in his eyes as he lunged for my neck and started kissing it. He was making it kind of hard for me to breathe. “Umm...I don’t know. I don’t really wanna answer without Nick here to help me with that.”

“Well then come by yourself. We don’t need my brother.”

“By myself? I think I might feel a little awkward about that. I don’t know.”

“Come on, it’ll be a nice way for us to get to know you a little better. I wanna try and figure out what you see in my brother.”

“I love him Drew, isn’t that enough?”

“Well let us get to know you then, how ‘bout it?” Right before I was about to answer Nick decided to kiss me on the lips. I swear that boy has no manners when he wants something, but then again I wasn’t really working on resisting him either. “Hello, are you still there?” Drew asked.

“Yeah,” I finally managed when Nick stopped kissing me, “I was just choking on something,” Yeah on your brother’s tongue, I thought, “Anyway, I’ve thought about it and you’ve convinced me, I’d love to have dinner with you and Lea,” I answered.

“Okay, we’ll come by to pick you up.”

“That’s okay, I’m gonna bring someone with me. Just call me later and tell me where my special friend and I can meet you.”

“Special friend? Sure, whatever you want,” he said confusingly.

“Okay, bye Drew, see you later.”

“All right, and don’t forget to tell my brother I called and I’ll call you again to tell you where to meet us.”

“Got it, bye,” then I hung up the phone.

“What’s this about a ‘special friend’?” Nick asked, in between kisses.

I made him look at me, with my arms around his neck I said, “How would you like to play a little trick on your brother?”

“Mmm, what d’ya got in mind?”

I told him about my plan and it was put into motion. Drew wasn’t the only one who knew how to play practical jokes on people, although mine was a little cruel. I couldn’t help it, it was the perfect opportunity.

Before dinner, Nick and I spent some nice quality time together. Then at about five Drew called again. “Hello,” I answered.

“Hi, I was just calling to tell you where to meet us.”

“Oh okay.”

So he told me, then he said, “By the way have you seen Nick yet?”

“Have I seen Nick?” I asked looking at Nick to help give Drew an answer, Nick nodded his head and reached out for the phone. “Yeah I have actually, he just got in, want to talk to him?”

“Yeah, thanks that would be great,” Drew answered.

I handed Nick the phone and I walked away, “Hello? ...Oh hey Drew what’s up? ...Where have I been? Out. Why what’s it to you? And what are you doing calling my girlfriend? I didn’t give you her number. ...Oh did you, why? ...Looking for me why? ...Fine don’t tell me why you’ve been looking for me. ...You’re taking her out? ...She’s bringing a special friend you say, interesting.” I could see Nick trying not to laugh because from what I could tell Drew was concerned. “Well I don’t run her life man; she can do whatever she wants. ...Yeah I know she’s my girlfriend, but she’s my girlfriend not my property. ...Do you tell Lea who she can and can’t see? ...I didn’t think so. So tell me why you really wanted to talk to me. ...You don’t remember? Must not have been important I take it. ...Well all right then, bye,” Nick said, and then he hung up the phone.

“So he didn’t tell you why he’s been trying to contact you?” I asked even though I already knew the answer.

“Nope, apparently he forgot, I think he got too caught up in this ‘special friend’ business of yours,” he said giving me a devilish grin.

“You know I was thinking about that, maybe we shouldn’t do it. It might be too cruel.”

“Honey, it’s not that bad. My brother has done worse. It’ll be fun to see his reaction. But I promise that we won’t let it go too far. Okay?”

“All right. It’s just that I don’t want your brother to think horribly of me because of it you know. But it’s just that he keeps asking why I’m with you and it’s getting to me so I just thought you know...”

“Baby, he deserves it. Besides, I think that he’ll think it’s funny when we reveal what’s real.”

“Really?” I asked still a little unsure of the plan.

“Yeah, come here,” he said motioning for me to go to him as he walked toward me too. Then he pulled me into his arms and held me tight, “Baby, I’m never gonna let anything hurt you.”

I thought about that holding him close to me. Did that line include people? I wondered. But all I said was, “Nick I love you, always have and always will.”

“I love you too, my angel.” He pulled me away and made me look at him, “Never forget that. You mean the world to me. I don’t think I could survive without you, now that I’ve found you.” A tear rolled down my cheek. He wiped it away asking, “What’s that for?”

“I’m happy,” I simply stated.

“Aren’t happy people supposed to wear a smile,” I chuckled at the comment, which put a smile on my face, “That’s what I’m talking about.”

“Well it was a happy tear Nick, one I’ve never really experienced before now. You did it, you’ve helped me find my happy place.”

“And you’ve helped me find mine.” I put my head back onto his chest as we just stood in the middle of the room holding each other.

Then I said, “We better get ready.”

“In a few more minutes, let me soak this moment up a little more, before we go make a fool out of my brother, or should I say a bigger fool.” So we lingered on a little bit longer and then went to get ready. When we were finished I was in a nice casual dress and Nick looked nothing like himself, which was exactly what we were going for. It was definitely going to be an interesting night.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 26~

When Nick and I arrived at the restaurant, Lea and Drew were already there. So we walked over to the table and I introduced them, “Drew, Lea this is my special friend Scott. Scott, this is Drew and his wife Lea.”

“It’s nice to meet you two,” Nick said.

“So what do you two have going?” Drew asked looking confused at his own question. I think he was getting suspicious and feeling exactly what we wanted him to feel.

“Oh, well we’re just friends,” I said.

“What, I thought we were more than that?” Nick said, then he gave me a kiss.

Pushing him away, I said, “Scott, I told you not in front of them.”

“Sorry, baby, it’s just that every time you tell people we’re only friends, it hurts a little,” he said sounding very sad.

I glanced over at Drew and saw a look of shock on his face, then I said, “But I told you already that I’d only bring you if you behave. I told you that these two are important in my career.”

“I know, but why do you have to pretend to date that bum? You’re my woman. I’m sick and tired of you hangin’ out with that geek.”

“Scott, you’re dining with his brother, now shut up.” I looked over at Drew and Lea. They both had the most shocked expressions on their faces. My guilt was starting to eat me up and I was about ready to burst, but instead I said, “I’m sorry about that.”

“This explains it,” Drew said. “You don’t really love my brother do you? You’ve just been using him to help your career,” he was getting pissed.

“I can’t believe that you would do such a thing,” Lea said to me.

“Look, I didn’t mean to, it just happened,” I responded. “Nick said that he loved me and I just had to take the opportunity to do something about it.”

“But that’s horrible. Does Nick know about Scott?” Lea asked.

“Yeah, he knows about me. He doesn’t know that we’re together though, obviously. He just thinks that we’re nothing but friends.” Nick answered.

“If you’ll excuse me I need to go to the powder room,” I felt I needed to get away to compose myself, so I got up and left, with Lea following me.

When we got to the restroom, Lea asked me, “Okay what gives? What’s going on? Why would you do such a thing to my brother like that?”

I was kind of trying to contain my laughter as well as hide my guilt. “Lea, there’s something I should probably tell you.”

“What, what could you possibly have to say to explain yourself? You know I’m usually a good judge of character, but I was so wrong about you. I thought you loved Nick and here you are out with another guy and...” a smile started creeping across my face I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “What’s so funny? You think this is funny?”

“Actually, yes. Look Lea, I’m sorry that I deceived you like this, but you weren’t wrong, I do love Nick.”

“Then what is all this? I don’t think a woman in love would cheat on her man like this, especially out in public.”

“I like your passion, I knew I liked you for a reason. Don’t say anything just listen to me.” She nodded her head and kept silent. “I love Nick with all my heart, but your husband would like to think otherwise, or at least pretend that he does. So Nick and I decided that we were going to play a little trick on your husband to make him see that he’s wrong. Sitting out there is Scott yes, but it’s also Nick.”

“You mean, that’s my brother?” she asked shocked.

“Yes, it is. We were going to tell you two eventually, but I guess I couldn’t take it anymore and you were getting so mad at me. I’m sorry.”

“No I’m sorry, I should’ve known better.”

“How could you? You haven’t known me for very long. I hope you’re not mad at me still.”

“No of course not. Drew may be my husband, but you’re right he does deserve this. And now that I think about it, it is kind of funny.”

“Will you still play along, like you don’t know anything?”

“Definitely. How are you planning on letting it out?”

“I’m not sure yet. I guess we’ll just have to go with the flow. Although I must say that I hope it happens soon, before this gets out of hand. We should probably get back now. Drew’s probably scared out of his wits. I think Nick’s having too much fun.”

We walked back out to see Drew, just staring at Nick. When we got back to the table Lea and I both sat down in our spots then I asked, “What’s going on?”

“Tell your boyfriend to give me back my phone,” Drew said.

I looked at Nick, “What, he was planning on calling the geek to tell him what’s going on between us. By the way we ordered for you, hope you don’t mind.”

I turned my head, looked at Lea and gave her a wink, it was perfect. Then I looked at Nick again and said, “No, now Scott give him back his phone, let him do what he thinks is right. Besides, I don’t think we should keep our love from Nick anymore. It isn’t right.” Nick just stared at me. I pulled his head and whispered to him what I was thinking. Then he handed Drew his phone.

“Make your call then,” Nick said. He was so cute trying to act all tough.

Drew took his phone and proceeded to call Nick’s cell phone. I was expecting Nick’s phone to go off so we could end the whole thing, but no sound came. Then Drew said, “Hello, Nick this is Drew, I have news for you so call me back when you get this message.” Then he hung up his phone. “It was his voice mail. But I’ll be sure to tell him all about this when he gets my message.”

[Baby_Girl89]

Nick and I looked at each other, his cell phone was off. Nick excused himself for a bit. While he left Drew said to me, “I can’t believe it. This whole time I was just joking around trying to make Nick nervous and this whole time you were seeing someone behind his back. How could you do that to my brother Jenn? He really loves you. You should hear the way he talks about you. I think that he really has the right to...” Ring, ring. It was Drew’s phone. “Hold on,” he looked at it to see who it was. “Good, it’s Nick, now he can hear what a real winner he has for a girlfriend. I can’t believe he left Jessica for you.” I saw Lea wince and she mouthed the word, “Sorry” to me. That hurt, I really wish Nick were there to hear that. “Hey, Nick. ...I have something to tell you. ...What no, you can’t go I have something important to say. ...No it can’t wait.” He closed his phone, “I can’t believe he hung up on me. Said he had something important to do.”

Just then Nick walked back and sat down. Then he gave me a big kiss. “I missed you, didya miss me?”

“Scott, what did I tell you?” I told him.

“That’s it I’m calling him back. Why he left Jessica to be with a two timer like you I’ll never understand.” I looked into Nick’s eyes and I could tell that he wanted to say something, but he knew that his brother was just about to eat his words. But those words were hurting Nick as much as they were hurting me, maybe even more, but I had to hear it twice. He called Nick and right on schedule the phone rang, “Hello,” Nick answered.

“Hey Nick, it’s Drew.”

“Yeah I know, what do you want? I’m trying to have dinner with my girlfriend and my jerk of a brother,” he said staring at Drew.

Drew dropped his phone, Nick put his away. Drew just stared at us and Nick “showed” himself. “Oh my gosh,” Drew said in shock. “You mean this whole time...you,” he tried to continue.

“Yeah, Drew. And I don’t appreciate you calling my girlfriend a two timer,” Nick looked at me and said, “I’m sorry baby, I let it get out of hand. I should have stopped him as soon as he mentioned Jessica.”

I forced myself to put a smile on my face and I said, “No honey, it’s okay, it’s not your fault. How were you to know that Drew would react like that. But it does put my heart at ease to know that you do have people who love you as much as I do and would want to protect you from anything like that ever really happening,” I said trying to convince myself of it all and trying really hard to hold back my tears.

Drew just kept staring, then he finally spoke up and said, “I’m so sorry Jenn. I ... I don’t know what came over me. I guess I care more about Nick than I thought.”

“No Drew, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that to you. I was just getting really annoyed with the fact that you didn’t believe me when I said that I loved Nick, or at least pretended not to believe me. So I thought that it would’ve been funny to see how you would react if you were right. I guess I should’ve thought it out more carefully.”

“I’m still sorry, I shouldn’t have said the Jessica comment.”

“The first or second time? Well I guess I deserve it, I mean at least she wouldn’t have openly done anything like this if at all.”

“Wait a minute, you said it twice?” Nick asked, with a certain amount of edge in his voice.

“Honey, forget about it,” I said. “He didn’t know what he was talking about. Besides look at it this way, you have something to hold over his head now.”

Nick backed down, “All right, but just listen to me Drew, this wasn’t all her idea. Don’t ever think of her like that again. We thought you’d be able to handle yourself better.”

“I probably would’ve thought the same thing. I never would have thought about getting so riled up about it. Thinking about it now, it was pretty funny. It would’ve been funnier had it happened to someone else, but you two got me good.”

“See honey, I told you he’d think it was funny.”

“Yeah, but I think it’s safe to say I won’t be playing that joke on anyone again. I don’t even want to think of what Jeff and Justin would’ve done.”

“Jeez Drew, I can’t believe you said those things to her like that. I didn’t think you’d go that nuts,” Lea commented.

Drew turned to his wife, “Wait a minute, you knew about this and you let me make a fool of myself?”

“I only knew about it after I followed her to the bathroom, besides I think you deserved it after the way you treated your brother. You just wanted to make him feel bad and well, you just deserved it that’s all. Now you know that you shouldn’t do that anymore and you can see that she really does just love him. Just like I just love you for some odd reason.” Then she gave a smile and he returned it and they gave each other a passionate kiss.

Then Nick feeling left out, no doubt, pulled me in for one too. Then he said, “I’m sorry,” and gave me another one. Man does he kiss like a maniac when he feels sorry. I was tempted to use it to my advantage.

Then the waiter came, “Ahem,” we all stopped our kissing, “I apologize for the interruption but I thought you might like to know that your food is here.”

“Thank you,” I said, being the only one able to speak for some reason. Then we were given our food.

And suddenly as if it were like magic the tension was gone. The night went on as if nothing had happened at all. Every once in a while Drew would just sputter out “I’m so sorry,” but aside from that it was nice. I vowed from that day on not to be quite so cruel, but in retrospect I think it was something that I had to do.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 27~

After dinner, we went back to the hotel. We all sat on my bed and talked for a while. Lea in Drew’s arms and me in Nick’s. But after it all, Drew was still apologizing. There didn’t seem to be a way to make him stop. “Jenn I am so sorry about what happened earlier.”

“Drew it’s not your fault,” I said.

“Well I shouldn’t have said that in front of you anyway. Besides, it wasn’t right for me to question why you’re with my brother.”

“I understand why you did it, I guess, but I think that after a while it just got really old and I wanted to come up with a way to get you to stop.”

“Well you definitely did that. It’s just I don’t know, I feel really guilty and all, especially since I was the one who invited you out to dinner. I’m gonna find a way to make it up to you one day, I will.”

“Drew,” I said, looking at Nick, “There isn’t anything in this world you could possibly get me to make me any happier than I already am. I have the world right here in my arms.” Nick smiled at me.

“And I’m not planning on taking that away from her,” Nick chimed in.

“You better not,” I said teasingly.

“Never,” he said right before giving me another kiss.

“Well I’ll figure something out,” Drew said.

“Drew will you stop worrying about it, already. I’ll tell you what just tell me that ...”

“Anything,” Drew said. I could hear the eagerness in his voice at what he could do to make up for it.

“Just tell me you’ll never do it again and that you believe me now, and we’ll call it even.”

“Done and done, but I don’t think it’s enough.”

“Jenn I don’t think you’re going to convince Drew otherwise. He always makes good on his promises that’s why I married him. He’s such a good man.” Lea put in.

“I believe you, but honestly, there’s nothing you can do for me, at least for now. So how about, when I need you I’ll call on you.”

“All right, I guess that’ll have to do for now,” Drew finally agreed. At that moment I didn’t really realize how much I would need Drew’s help anyway. He later, way more than made up for it.

“Well Lea, I think we need to leave these two love birds alone and spend some time alone?” Drew said to his wife.

“I think that’s a good idea honey.” They got up and then Lea said, “Well it was a pretty okay night, but I think we can have a better one. How about next weekend we go out without any problems?”

“Sounds good to me,” I said.

Then Nick said, “That’s fine with me too if...”

“If what Nick?” I asked him.

“I was just gonna say if they wanted to go to New York with us, but I forgot that you never really gave me an answer yet, only a maybe.”

“Well honey, I guess we could go to New York while I’m still deciding.”

“Really? That would be so great. I can show you all the sites. You still haven’t been there yet right?” he asked me.

“No honey, I haven’t,” I answered, like I would’ve told him that I had even if I had. He was just so eager to show me around, why disappoint him. I hadn’t been there anyway so I guess these lines don’t really matter.

Anyway, he looked over at Lea and Drew, “Well we’re going to be in New York next week but if you guys would like to join us, we’d love to have dinner with you again.”

“What about it Lea? New York next week?” Drew asked his wife.

“Oh I’d love to go to New York. Jenn and I can go to all the shopping sites while you guys have some manly time too,” Lea commented.

“Ooo, shopping. Girl you just said my favorite word,” I said.

“Hey,” Nick said, “I thought I was your favorite word,” and he gave me a pout.

“Okay my second favorite word next to ‘I’,” I said seeing if Nick would notice.

“That’s right,” Nick said, then just realizing what I said he said, “Wait, what?” By then Lea and Drew were laughing hysterically. “No what I meant was...”

“Nicky, I was just kidding, we know what you meant,” I kissed him on the cheek. “I love you goofy.”

“I love you too angel.”

“Well this is our cue to go. Well once again, I’m sorry and I will make it up to you.”

“Forget about it.”

“Well I can see why Nick likes you so much, but I’m sorry, I’m gonna have to make it up to you somehow.”

“Whatever, you say, Drew. Honestly you’ll probably forget about it in about a week anyway,” I got up to walk them to the door.

“Not likely Jenn,” Lea stated, giving me a hug, “Well I guess we should be going now. Come on Drew.”

“Wait, I want my hug too,” Drew said.

As I gave Drew his hug I said, “Don’t worry about it, okay. It doesn’t matter,” I said releasing him.

“Goodbye you two,” Lea said as she was taking Drew out.

“Goodbye Lea, Drew,” I called after them as they were leaving. Then I closed the door and locked it. Afterward I walked back over to Nick and sat back down next to him.

“Now that we’re alone,” Nick whispered in my ear.

“You know they really are so much in love,” I said.

“Remind you of a couple?” Nick asked me.

“I don’t know, should they?” I asked, looking up at him.

“Hmm, maybe this will remind you,” and then he bent his head down to give me a kiss. And I turned my body around to return his kiss putting my arms around his neck. I swear we could’ve kissed all night long the way we were going at it. When we finally stopped we just sat on my bed. He was holding me in his arms. And I was holding him in mine, with my head on his chest, “So baby, tell me about your hopes and dreams.”

[Baby_Girl89]

“Nicky, there isn’t really much to tell you. I don’t really...” then I thought for a second, as I pulled away, there was something he still didn’t know, I wanted to be a lawyer. “Well there is one thing,” I said looking up into his eyes.

“What is it?” he asked smiling at me.

Smiling back I answered, “Well just like you have the secret urge to be a sportscaster I want to be a lawyer.” Then I added, “That’s why I’m going to college, aside from just wanting a higher education.”

“Really, that’s amazing. I bet you’d be really good at it too. Have you thought about what law school you want to go to yet?”

“Yes and no. I’ve thought about what law schools are out there but I haven’t really decided on anything permanent yet, besides I still have two to three more years for that.”

“Well whatever you decide, I’ll be behind you every step of the way.”

“Thank you,” I said giving him a hug. We pulled apart and I saw the most magnificent smile on his face. “Nick I don’t know what I did to deserve you but I’m really glad that you’re in my life.”

“And I’m glad you’re in mine angel.”

“Nicky, tell me about your dreams,” I said, wanting to just hear him talk to me.

“Well what do you want to know?”

“I don’t know anything.”

“Well you already know about the sportscaster thing.”

“Yeah, but is there anything else?”

“Do you really wanna know?” he asked giving me a devilish grin before pulling me into his arms again.

“Of course, I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to know,” I replied snuggling into the crook of his neck.

“I dream about us.”

“Well I know that silly, but what’s your goal in life?”

“To make you my wife and have a family together.”

I was beginning to get tired, “That’s nice,” I said yawning. I don’t think I really processed what he had said to me. I couldn’t help it, he felt so comfortable.

“Really, I thought so too, but I thought that if I told you about it, I’d scare you away.”

“No honey,” I said yawning again, “That’s sounds wonderful.”

“I think you’re tired,” he said to me.

“No, no,” *yawn* “why would you say that?”

“Because, you’re yawning like mad.”

“I’m sorry baby, it’s just that you’re so comfortable that I just can’t help it,” I said as my eyes started pulling themselves shut.

“Maybe I should go,” he said.

“No, don’t go, stay,” I said.

“Honey, I should let you go to sleep, you’ve had a long day.”

“But...” *yawn*.

“No buts I’m leaving now,” he said.

“Just stay a little longer,” I pleaded giving him my own pouts.

“Now don’t give me that look...I...I…you know I can’t resist it,” he said smiling at me.

Even with half-open eyes I could see a twinkle in his eyes and that magnificent smile, “I know that’s why I’m giving it to you,” I said sleepily.

“All right I’ll stay a little longer.”

“Good, ‘cause you feel better than the pillows. Lie down with me,” I said to him. I must have been deliriously sleepy. I was acting in a way I’d never done completely conscious. I guess I was letting my guard down.

He gently laid us back. My eyes were getting heavier and heavier by the second. I know I should’ve let him leave when he wanted to, but it just felt so good to have him next to me, that I couldn’t bear to let him leave. With my eyes fully closed I just laid there feeling his chest heave up and down beneath me, and I could hear him humming a lullaby. It was such a wonderful night. It was hard to imagine that just a few hours before the night had been something like a disaster. Eventually I just blacked out.

I dreamt that Nick was still lying next to me. I didn’t think that he would be there when I woke up. I thought about what he had said to me. To make you my wife and have a family together. It seemed to echo in my mind, making it hard to concentrate on anything else. Did he really say that or was I imagining things again? For a while I was beginning to think I was in a coma or something and everything that was happening was some big dream I never wanted to wake up from. But then who could explain some of the stranger things that even I couldn’t have come up with.

I woke up and Nick was sleeping beside me. I looked over and thought I was dreaming. Then he woke up and said, “Good morning beautiful. How is my lovely wife this fine morning?”

“Wife?” I asked him.

“Of course, don’t you remember we got married last night? Don’t tell me you forgot about our wedding.”

“You mean to tell me this is real?”

“Of course it is beautiful. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“But I just remember you telling me last night that you wanted to make me your wife and have a family together.”

“Yes, and that’s exactly what we’re doing.”

“Nick, how long have we been together?”

“Almost a year, why?”

“Whew, then this is a dream.”

“Honey, what are you talking about?”

“Nothing, never mind.” Then flashes of “last night” came into my head. Nick and I were indeed “married” and we had quite the night if you catch my drift. “Last night was amazing Nicky,” I said.

“So you do remember?”

“Of course I just had to play with your head first as usual,” I said carefully.

“That’s what I love about you beautiful.”

“Well I love you Nicky,” I said.

“I love you too, and I’m gonna spend the rest of my life proving it to you.” Then he kissed me. The kiss felt so real I could taste it.

Then I woke up with a start. I jumped up with a shock, there was someone in bed with me. I looked up toward the face and I realized Nick fell asleep on my bed with me. What was I supposed to do? I didn’t want to wake him, it was my fault to begin with, besides he looked so peaceful and oh so adorable. My choices were to go back to sleep with him there or go to his room and sleep in his bed. Well naturally I should’ve gone to his room, but I was just too tired to move that far so I decided to just go back to sleep right there. Consciously knowing that he was next to me, made me feel really good inside. Nick had a tendency to do that to me. And then more sweet dreams followed as I knocked out again.

[Baby_Girl89]

~Chapter 28~

The next morning I awoke a little uneasy, and yet really good and refreshed. I’m a strange girl I know. Anyway, I woke up and truly realized for the first time that Nick and I had slept in the same bed. I looked at my clock it was nine in the morning. I figured it would be okay to wake him up. I whispered into his ear, “Nicky, it’s time to wake up.” He stirred a little but remained asleep. “Nicky, it’s time to get up sweetie.” He still kept sleeping, and then I started to run my fingers up and down his arm, that woke him up.

“What, what’s going on?” he asked me groggily.

“This is a first you’re usually the one waking me up,” I said.

He smiled before asking, “What are you doing in my room?”

“Correction, what are you doing in my room?”

He shot up, “What?” Then he started to look around and he realized I was right. “Oh my gosh, what happened what am I doing in here?” he asked panicking.

“Jeez Nick don’t sound so happy about it there,” I said sarcastically.

“I’m sorry honey it’s just that I don’t understand why I’m in here.”

“Nick, don’t panic, nothing happened.”

“Why aren’t you more worried about this? Do you know what happened?”

“I have a pretty good idea,” I said sheepishly.

“Could you fill me in?” he asked, still looking confused.

“All I can think of is that you must have fallen asleep in here last night, without realizing it when I asked you to stay,” I replied.

He gave a sigh of relief. “Whew, I’m glad you don’t think I planned this.”

“Of course not honey, I know you wouldn’t do something like that, even if you had, what a stunning performance,” I said giving a little chuckle.

“Oh so you think that was funny do ya?”

“Um...yeah. I realized you were in here last night at about three. I didn’t wanna wake you and I didn’t want to get up so I kind of let this happen too,” I confessed.

“Oh so it’s your fault,” he said giving me a devilish grin.

“Not exactly, I didn’t tell you not to leave at all or to fall asleep in here.”